Crazy Eyes Got Screwed!!!
Please go to your piggy bank, smash it to the ground, collect all the coins and immediately send them to YouTube Superstar Tricia Walsh-Smith aka Crazy Eyes. She got screwed in court yesterday! Even her crazy eyes are upset! Look at them. They are frowning.
Some stupid ass judge ruled that Tricia must get her crazy eyes out of the Park Avenue apartment she shared with her husband, Philip Smith. Even worse, Crazy Eyes will only get a lump sum of $750,000, the amount she agreed to in a prenup. She didn't know what she was signing! Her crazy eyes were acting up that day.
The judge also said that Crazy Eyes' infamous YouTube rants humiliated her husband and caused him great pain including heart issues. Oh please! He's acting! He is in showbusiness! The judge went on to say, "The posting of the defendant's first YouTube video was a watershed event in this marriage, elevating what was still primarily a private dispute into a public spectacle."
Crazy Eyes plans to appeal. She told the Post, "I thought it sucked. I'd be better off in Baghdad. President Bush is bringing democracy to Iraq. He should try bringing it to New York. I'm going to go down swinging."
$750,000?! That's not even enough money for her yearly supply of Visine! Crazy Eyes is poor and this angers me. Does Philip expect her to live on the streets, or worse - a studio apartment?!
Grab the popcorn and Fanta, because you know this insane bitch is going to deliver the performance of a lifetime on her next YouTube masterpiece. She's the Tallulah Bankhead of YouTube!