Wednesday, July 9th 2008

Morning Wood

Do not listen to Chris Martin! Naming your baby Chewbacca is not ok - Holy Moly!

Note to Brooke Hogan: Don't attempt the sexy - Popoholic

Crypt Keeper King gets his own street - Mollygood

The Hogan trash bags are still at each other - Celebitchy

Silly string bukkake - SOW

Kiki Dunst with some nerd - I'm Not Obsessed

Steve Carrell saves Anne Hathaway - ICYDK

Posted by: Michael K


solaia's picture

Brooke's gotta mustache!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(crying like Eddie Murphy did)

In the first pic she looks a scary lot like brother Nicky

Clio's picture

Eh, Coldplay has some good songs, but Chris Martin is a major dick. He and Fishsticks must stroke each other's egos all day long. I'm kind of surprised no one picked up on his quote that everyone in the world should be able to vote in a US election.

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The real LA? (on the right)- http://bp1.blogger.com/_p2jgVV2iZVs/Rwbyb01mwZI/AAAAAAAAAig/aetvoWN5Hbk/...

cadysmith75's picture

Someone mentioned that you met your woman on the famous celebrities/rich men seeking beautiful women site SugarbabyMeet.c Qm? True or not?? ...

cadysmith75's picture

Someone mentioned that you met your woman on the famous celebrities/rich men seeking beautiful women site SugarbabyMeet.c Qm? True or not?? ...

Submitted by BRADIFUL BITCH on July 9, 2008 - 7:41am.
Chris Martin has never had an original thought, EVER!
He's trying to be Bono and failing miserably, pretentiousness is not waterproof, fireproof or Fishstick proof, it's just proof he's a tool.

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I always thought he was trying to ape Thom Yorke (to which he'll never, ever come close), lol. I liked what Holy Moly said about him. At first you kind of brushed Coldplay under the rug since it was "inoffensive" and boring, now they just grate on my every last nerve. Every single station is playing that fucking lame song of theirs. I can't stand them at all, and it looks like being married to Fishsticks turned him into a colossal asshole. Gee, I wonder why...

I have a cunt of a cousin who married a dorky, mild mannered guy. Fast forward eight years later, and he is the biggest asshole I have ever personally seen. He exudes asshole-ness. Even my grandma thinks he's a prick.

TheBreakdown's picture

Miss Priss:

let me break it down for you:

Once upon a time in LaLa Land, the search was on for The Next Jodie Foster.

(don't laugh now, but it was Lindsay Lohan)

She's cute, they said.
She can act, they said.

Fast forward five years later?

She's a Hot Ass Mess!

Movies bombing left and right, too many trips to rehab to count, and now she's gone 'gutter gayelle'?

Enter Anne Hathaway.

Hollywood is looking for this generation's Pretty (Enough) Woman.

Anne fits the bill, she can act, and until her ex-boyf tainted her rep, she was scandal free.

Hire the right PR, put her in the right movies, add some smoke and mirrors?

Bada bing, ta to the goddamn da...

a quasi-star is born (or manufactured).

www.myspace.com/triston

Miss Priss's picture

Your mom ate...

Thanks. ANd that's true, true beauty comes from within...;0) She does seem like a nice girl

♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦
I say we get dangerous

Your Mom Ate the Taco's picture

Submitted by Miss Priss on July 9, 2008 - 10:50am.
Can someone explain to me why people keep saying that Anne Hathaway is gorgeous?
I mean, she's not ugly, not beautiful, but pretty. Not gorgeous. She's overrated...and I like her.

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I have a friend who used to work press junkets in NYC, and he happened to work the junket for The Princess Diaries 2. He told me he loved Anne Hathaway because she was friendly, she exhibited class, and seemed quite intelligent and very down-to-earth. I think that when someone possesses these characteristics and they shine through, it makes a person appear more desirable/beautiful/etc.

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In heaven, everything is fine. You've got your good things, and I've got mine.

Miss Priss's picture

Can someone explain to me why people keep saying that Anne Hathaway is gorgeous?
I mean, she's not ugly, not beautiful, but pretty. Not gorgeous. She's overrated...and I like her.

Steve Carrell is so great. Love that dude

♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦
I say we get dangerous

Miss Priss's picture

Are we sure Brooke is 19 years old? Really?!

Shit. Bitch is ruff lookin'

♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦
I say we get dangerous

kdracofan's picture

Brooke looks terrible and Chris Martin annoys me

Dirk Diggler's picture

Chris Martin turns out to be as annoying, pompous and delusional as his cold-fish of a wife. Can you imagine the whining that goes on in that house? The kids are gonna need therapy -- and not just because of their stupid names.

LongIslandLolita's picture

Steve Carell is a stand up guy. What a class act!

Silvara0428's picture

BTW Steve is just a big ole sweetie and why the hell can't I find a man like that WTF!!!!! Oh, yeah I'm bat shit crazy that's why!!!

Dea's picture

Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on July 9, 2008 - 12:05pm.

oh, my bad! it´s just that "Crypt Keeper King" fit so well, plus, i just finished reading an old book of his, The dark half. Guess i´m kingmatized... lol

**whatever**

Callan's picture

Submitted by Clarisse on July 9, 2008 - 9:38am.
I love Steve Carell almost as much as i despise Chris Martin.
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Agreed. Not only is Steve Carell funny, but he is also one of the classiest and hardest working people in Hollywood. Wish more celebs were like him.

Chris Martin is a fucktard.

KD's picture

Brooke looks like Shia LaBouf in that photo!

Your Mom Ate the Taco's picture

Submitted by Dea on July 9, 2008 - 10:01am.
omg!!!! i looooooooooooooove stephen king!!!! love, love, love, love, love *faints*

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I do too, but the article's on Larry King--not Stephen. Shelley Duvall was the featured birthday slut on Monday and I guess you missed our discussion on The Shining and Stephen King in that thread.

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In heaven, everything is fine. You've got your good things, and I've got mine.

Your Mom Ate the Taco's picture

Submitted by LoLo on July 9, 2008 - 9:54am.
_Taco Mom Times!!!!!!

That bag is a hefty sinch sack that leaks all over the hallway on your way out to the dumpster!

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a bountifully overflowing hefty cinch-sack! And THAT bag goes to the cum dumpster.

*******************************************************
In heaven, everything is fine. You've got your good things, and I've got mine.

Dea's picture

omg!!!! i looooooooooooooove stephen king!!!! love, love, love, love, love *faints*

**whatever**

PinkPostIt's picture

I don't get what all the fuss is about with Chris Martin. He is far from attractive, his music is boring as shit, and he's married to an a-hole who gives herself way too much credit.

Can someone please enlighten me?

joanne's picture

The Hogans need to go away. Move to France, they like american trash there. I was told the French looked down on America, just another lie from mom I guess.

Your Mom Ate the Taco's picture

Coldplay's new song, Viva La Vida (or whatever the hell it's called), is stolen. Well, the melody was stolen. Opie and Anthony played the original song from which it was stolen. It's by a band that Chris Martin's fond of, and they had a clip of the song from a live show that Chris Martin happened to be attending. Don't remember the name of the band, but gimme a break--it was seven in the morning!

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In heaven, everything is fine. You've got your good things, and I've got mine.

Snarkley's picture

Dammit Brooke! Now all the fish are gonna smell like that.

LoLo's picture

_Taco Mom Times!!!!!!

That bag is a hefty sinch sack that leaks all over the hallway on your way out to the dumpster!

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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!

Your Mom Ate the Taco's picture

Submitted by LoLo on July 9, 2008 - 9:41am.
chris martin needs to suck a bag od madonna dicks

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I hear that bag is humungous!

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In heaven, everything is fine. You've got your good things, and I've got mine.

If Chewy was balding that would totally be my hubby.

parissucksliterally's picture

Chris, you are making it VERY hard to keep defending you.

Brooke is trash.

Steve Carrell is awesome...i don;t think I have ever heard a bad thing about him.

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“the more I want you, the less I get....ain't that just the way things are...."
- Annie Lennox "Cold"

OXA's picture
putsomestankonit's picture

Chris Martin is boring, his band is boring and his wife is boring. Even the names Apple and Moses are boring.

Now if they do have another child and they name it Chewbacca, that's some excitment right there.

laurensav35's picture

aww i love steve carrell.

mcnightmare's picture

chewy's looking a little old, which is weird, since he's a big furry outfit. of course, he and harrison ford are the same age, but still....

botox for chewbacca.

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when a girl's an empty kettle, she should be on her mettle
and yet i'm torn apart
just because i'm presumin' that i could be *kinda* human
if i only had a heart

ImpertinentVixen's picture

Steve Carell is awesome, a down-to-earth nice guy, according to someone who went to college with him. Seems he really is that way. He's from one town over in Massachusetts from where I grew up.

Love him!

♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠♠
I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories. - George Carlin

ImpertinentVixen's picture

Chris Martin (Tartar Sauce) is an overinflated windbag who likes to hear himself talk. I don't need baby naming advice from someone who named their kids Apple and Moses.

Well, that's it for me today. I have to take little Bennie and the Jets and Tide with Bleach to their swimming classes. Ta!

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I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories. - George Carlin

ISprainedMyUvula's picture

Most of the time, I'm under the impression that Steve Carrel is an egotistical dickwad. Then he does something like that and it makes me doubt my convictions.

Asshole.

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Tell the fake captain that Air Marshall Carlin says "go fuck yourself"!

loozer's picture

For once I am glad that my access was blocked. I stupidly clicked on the Brooke link and couldn't access it. Judging from the comments that is a very good thing.
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And in the end the love you take
Is equal to the love you make

The C word's picture

Betcha Apple and Moses give their kids the blandest of names.

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Work is the curse of the drinking classes.

OXA's picture

COLD PLAY IS AN INSULT TO MY ASS.
Click here: The Complete Book Of Farting - Alec Bromcie - Review - More Tea Vicar

BRADIFUL BITCH's picture

Chris Martin has never had an original thought, EVER!
He's trying to be Bono and failing miserably, pretentiousness is not waterproof, fireproof or Fishstick proof, it's just proof he's a tool.

?&!
"Don't get me twisted with average fan losers you have encountered. I am not one of them."
"I am more of a manipulative bitch than a cunt"
"LOVE ANGELINA aka HEART ANGELINA aka ???"

laurensav35's picture

yeah, nerds are hot.

LoLo's picture

chris martin needs to suck a bag od madonna dicks and shut the fuck up with making all of his shitty pussy music sounding the same!

every song sound the same. Like the sound of paint drying!
______________________________________________
We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!

TheBreakdown's picture

Brooke also inherited her father's genitalia.

It's Hulk's fault that she looks like that.

Human growth hormone begat Hulkeesha!

www.myspace.com/triston

loozer's picture

Never underestimate a nerd. Nerds are often great in the sack.
*************************************************
And in the end the love you take
Is equal to the love you make

joe's picture

Brooke Hogan = butterface

LoLo's picture

That aint right that Hogan thing pulling her damn bikini down like that where people swim!

Why do people TRY SO HARD at being sexy?

Ohhh look at me some sickie will be spankin their crazy looking pocket monkey to ME and i feel so purdy!

gag!
_____________________________________________
We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!

Snoogle's picture

My cold dead heart melted just a little bit when I read about Steve saving Anne. Chivalry does still exist.

♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥
You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because I just farted.

islandgirl's picture

Chris Martin is an annoying, pretentious ass munch. In case you didn't already listen to it, here's the Holy Moly guy describing the music of Coldplay...

http://www.fart-sounds.net/fart_sound_board.htm

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Sláinte duine a ól.

Silvara0428's picture

Brooke: floating headed amazon...not cute at all!

Aunt Bea's picture

THIS coming from a man who named his kid "Apple"

Not to mention he married Fishsticks