And The Valtrex Award For Lead Actress In A Shit Show Goes To.....
A Shot at Shit 2 spoiler alert! Keep moving on if you don't want to know who won the plastic key to Tila Tequila's hard-on.
So.... Last night's season finale, was like a scene out of the Lifetime movie version of SamRo and HoHan's love story. Pint-sized ladyboy, Tila Tequila, once again got her fake-bi-sexual heart torn to shreds on a reality TV show! Tila chose ogre hooker Kristy as her final choice. Kristy turned down Tila, because she's "scared and confused." The writers really should have just made her say, "Um...Sorry piggy, but I'm strictly dickly."
Their awful acting was truly amazing. Obviously, they are both graduates of "The Heidi Montag School of Shit Acting."
The crotch shot of Kristy in the limousine was a fitting ending. The fun and games didn't end there! Tila later posed a riveting poem on her Myspace:
BITCHES AIN’T SHIT BUT HOES AND TRICKS!
Thunderfuck my mouth is shut. Been a while, feel like a cunt.
Can't wait for this drama to pass.
Oh the joy.....fuck you. My ass.
Live a lie.
Tell my mind.
Over soon. I can't deny.
You will all soon see, the truth in my eyes.Smile on my face, the loving embrace....but instead I'll punch you in the face.
For a long time coming....I let you touch me....now that it's over bitch....You better start running.
Pent up inside....telling these lies....this has gone too far.....the world will soon die.Only 1 more day. To feel this way. Tomorrow I smile....brings another day!
Back to myself. Nobody else. Fuck all this bullshit. I'm back to myself. Yes. Thank the fuck God.
Tila
She's definitely the next Emily DICKinson.
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the cum guzzling Tiguana Tequilla
Whatever you do: Don't Feed The Celebs
Submitted by get serious on July 2, 2008 - 2:08pm
i think it was american society that created tila tequila, heidi montag and all the other dumbasses of their kind...
**whatever**
I wonder what you would have to be on to find her attractive
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If you're gonna reach for a star, reach for the lowest one you can.
Heh. It's all fun and games until there's a vagina in your mouth.
Kiss,
Fifi
"Self improvement is masturbation. Now self-destruction..."
fuck this tranny vietnamese hooker trash. cristi is hot. shot a hep is just a way for this bitch to pass around her herp. she is just pist because she got played.
'guyliner-wearing, walking vagina known as Pete Wentz'-MK-july 1,2008
Karma is a bitch, and I guess her name was Kristy! But I can't fault her, If your gonna prettend to be bisexual just to be a TV star, than Kristy has a right to use you also!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Submitted by menyc on July 2, 2008 - 1:50pm.
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Ha! I turned it off right when she said: "What am I doing wrong...?"
♥ ThreadKilla! Cheeto-Loving Redneck. Lean Like a Chola
tila: "i don't know why (sniff) i keep getting my heart broken"
maybe because you make these "love interests" eat pig vaginas.
Is there a list anywhere of all the peeps whose 15 minutes is OVER ??
Forget Dorothy Parker, I'm writing a thesis on the writing of Tila Tequila instead. My God, she's a literary genuis.
I hate this fucking E.T. looking Asian midget. I thought I was watching an episode of Passions. So cheesy and over-the-top.
My brothers partied with her the other day, or not so much partied as she tried to get with one of them, even invited him back her hotel room. When he turned her down she tried the other who's a majour slut but said no thanks. I never thought the day would come when he would turn down a whore, but apparently she looks like a 10 y.o. asian boy IRL - they weren't having that.
Seems it was just a couple of weeks ago you were posting clips of the season premiere. I guess if you saw the one guy head-butt the other guy that was the highlight. This clip was too stupid, My Sweet 16 is more riveting.
haha I loved that show last season. I didn;t even know she did another season
Submitted by Saltypretzel on July 2, 2008 - 12:47pm.
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hahah love that reference. it must be dimitri day. i just learned of that douchbag today and now here i see it again. brilliant.
I have never watched any of those celebreality VH1 shows as I believe they are the first sign of the apocalypse. I have however seen clips of this ho on "The Soup" and "Best Week Ever" and she looks like a cross between a fetus and a Thai LadyBoy. And, I love how she's coined the expression "Thank the fuck God"... Classy.
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When Kristy kissed the key and put it back on the giant heart, the hubby and I just rolled our eyes. It was just so fake and cheesy.
What a shocker that she chose a man last time and a woman this time. Way to keep that bisexual charade alive.
Whoever said she looked like a cartoon ant nailed it big time.
I hate that I watch this show knowing how fake it is. My favorite parts are when Tila 'cries' and her voice gets really high and incoherent. I wonder if they put that shit under their eyes that they used on ANTM to make the models cry during a photo shoot. How else would all these fake people cry on this fake show!
I loathe Tila,she is so fake,her show sucks,she is ugly and her music blows.I wish she would quietly disappear.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
Awww...BOO HOO. A douchebag fake bisexual vietcong hooker media whore got her feelings hurt on her stupid fake show, and she had to post her insane, uneducated, incoherent ramblings on her myspace page to "cope with her pain". Boo F-ing Woo. Someone should take this fake AC/DC vietcong hooker & the douchebags who created this piece of crap TV show out to the desert & put them in a hole; do an old school las vegas deal on them. American society will be much better off for it...
If you watch this show consider yourself a FUCKING IDIOT!!! Who the fuck wants to watch this melon headed midget try to 'find love' with the trash losers of america...FUCK GET RID OF THESE FUCKING SHIT SHOWS AND PUT MUSIC BACK ON THESE CHANNELS!!!
the world will DIE because someone fake broke up with tila nguyen. right.
BORING!
that clip was too long, and when i looked up to see if it was almost over, there was still 4 1/2 minutes left.
*GUNSHOT!*
angel-i:
Thanks. I think I peed a little whilst typing it.
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A good dick will make you punch a guppy in the face. ~MK 01/07/08
Submitted by tired of rumers... on July 2, 2008 - 11:45am.
LOL. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, that goes on one of the trashiest reality shows currently on TV is too good for Tila Tequila, Dani included.
Saltypretzel:
That made me laugh twice!
♥ ThreadKilla! Avvie courtesy of Viva La Lohan. Lean Like a Chola
Fake tears, fake drama, faux lesbian. Am I missing anything here? Nope. Moving on.
will someone please tell me the premise here? there are men and women on this show? why would a woman be there if she wasnt into women?
soooo glad I dont watch this shit!
☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★
Tila,
You are so elegant. Please email me at www.saltypretzeltimes.com. I will give you until 3:00 Thursday or I will be deleting this post.
The ball is in your court.
Oh, and by the by, if your Mom has cancer or if you are mentally unstable then I am not interested. Let the romance begin.
xo
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A good dick will make you punch a guppy in the face. ~MK 01/07/08
that bitch looks like a litle turtle penis
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
Submitted by -ohmy- on July 2, 2008 - 12:44pm.
Uh she should have choosen Dani from Season 1...
the end
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nah, dani's too good for her.
Uh she should have choosen Dani from Season 1...
the end
I wonder how many takes it took to get that final scene just right? That Kristy bitch doesn't know how to deliver lines without making them sound like they're being read off of a cue card.
I just watched that mess.
What a bunch of fucking losers.
That is all.
hearts; ThreadKilla! Avvie courtesy of Viva La Lohan. Lean Like a Chola
ANAL FISSURE
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"I'm allowed to complain that my fucking butt hurts every now and then." - Lolo
She should have had Kanye write it for her.
Ring around the rosey,
pocket full of poseur,
ashes ashes,
the hwore went down...
?&!
"Don't get me twisted with average fan losers you have encountered. I am not one of them."
"I am more of a manipulative bitch than a cunt"
"LOVE ANGELINA aka HEART ANGELINA aka ???"
The sad part about whores like Tila Tequila is that they tend to be completely deluded. I'm sure think's that she's amazingly deep and thoughtful, her wisdom flowing through her fingers while she types her fucking MySpace blog. Well ho, sorry to break it to you, but you're retarded, untalented, and ugly enough that all of my friends call you Anthead. Sucks to be you - a big fucking joke.
This bitch is never going away.
Fifteen buck, little man, put that shit in my hand. Nong, nong, ning-a ning-a nong nong!
And The Valtrex Award For Lead Actress In A Shit Show Goes To.....
Shit on a slimy green lizard M.K.!!!! I thought Wonky got ANOTHER show!!!!
PHEW!
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Religion and philosophy, philosophy and religion – they're two words which are both … different. In spelling.
"Why did you put me though this?!"
Umm, sorry to break it to ya bitch, but it was you who whored yourself out to MTV. Pay the consequences dumb slut.
Tila's fame....t-minus 15 minutes....
What's wrong with you Tila? Only the fact taht you breathe.
~♥~my little boy breathes new life into me~Xtina to Glamour~♥~
~♥~Rather than change who I am for Max, I bring the life lessons I've learned to the table~Xtina to Glamour~♥~
She's so classy.
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"There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls."
Stands-To-Piss aka Tila always looks like a bad scan - it's like someone didn't have all the controls right in Photoshop and they gotta stop using the effects like "twirl" because his mouth is on the side of his face.
Tick, tick, tick...BOOM!
Hey! Where did Tila go?
♥ ThreadKilla! Avvie courtesy of Viva La Lohan. Lean Like a Chola
She said ``Kristy used me to get on TV``...no fucking shit!
Fifteen buck, little man, put that shit in my hand. Nong, nong, ning-a ning-a nong nong!
yay I love that song.. Also. NO one is gonna want to be w/ her anyways.. She fucks/slurps/jumps/hurdles/lays/bites all thru the whole show w/ EveryONE.. So Gross!! Goodbye Love times, Hello Herpes/Aids Times.
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So that's what your after... A Farter?
I have no words for any of it!