Troll Girl
45-year-old Ali Lohan is in talks to play the female lead in a remake of the 1986 movie "Troll." White Oprah has already snagged the title role No, she hasn't, but that's truly a shame. That was the roll (as Brit Brit says) she was born to play.
Marc Malkin reports that Ali auditioned for the role of Eunice St. Clair who helps some boy named Harry Potter Jr (not that one) fight an evil troll. One of the Olsens better play the evil troll. I mean, they don't even have to shoot them. They can just use old footage from their shitty movies and "Full House."
The director had this to say about Ali, "The camera loves her. She's a really good actress...I am personally going to fight for her." The camera loves her? I know the camera adds 10 pounds, but does it also take off 20 years, because Ali cannot pass for a teen.
The original movie starred Sonny Bono and Julia Louis-Dreyfus.
Oh and when I said "she auditioned last week" I really meant "White Oprah gave all the producers blumpkins."
Thanks Derek
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Her nose looks like a shrivled dick. Her mom is so desperately trying to create similarities to Lindsay, the whole "asthma attacks" the "mean girls" on the show, and didnt this bitch have brown eyes years ago, next move red hair
"YOU'D BLEED ME DRY IF YA COULD, NOW TAKE THAT TEN POUND NOTE BUY THAT KID A BONNET AND TIE IT OVER ITS FUCKING FACE"
Noooooooooooooooo! No more Lohans! Hey, Hollywood: Here's an idea -- quit fucking hiring them. Maybe they'll go away.
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"I'm intellectual & stuff." "You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue & stuff."
http://www.myspace.com/dramaqueen365247
@DevilGirl,
Is your coworker's wife now vieing for the new reality show on the "Real Horsewives of Long Island?" I hear that they are taking appli-blumpkins.
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Tattoo free since 1952!
She looks kind of strange. It's like all the parts on her face just don't go together. Cutlet cheeks, odd nose, no upper lip. I think I'm going make a Mii that looks like her now.
DevilGirl. Like, how could he satisfy her after that? And why would he want to have sex w/ her again after a horse had been in her.. *shudders* *flushes puke* Funny about her eyes almost popping out!!
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I'm a soldier, I done told ya, don't Make me Fuck you up! Leave your head bust, I'm a head busta, man, I don't give a Fuck!
OK, I knew blumpkin. I had to look up Pasadena Mudslide...(you don't wanna know) but I can't find Compton Carwash.
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"His name is not 'fat shit cat,' it's Meatball...and he's eating your crab cakes."
♥♥ If you don't talk to your Cat about Catnip, who will? ♥♥
something must be done about that beak on her face
Speaking of old, according to MySpace (yeah, I went there), someone has a birthday...MK...
@Okla- The pictures were pretty unreal. I had heard of that stuff going on down in Mexico, I just never knew tourists took part in the action. I can only imagine the pain of it all. Let me say, in one of the shots she looked like her eyes were going to shoot out of her head. The whole thing was just wrong on a multitude of levels. What a husband!
Hey, WO! Whoring out Lindsay worked out nicely for the family, didn't it? This family is the epitome of Long Island white trash.
Submitted by cat777 on June 19, 2008 - 10:07am.
I had to look up 'blumpkin' - wish I hadn't now :-P
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Ditto.
Submitted by devilgirl on June 19, 2008 - 10:06pm.
@Okla- Yeah, true story. The guy was fired for showing the photos around the work place. I don't know if the horse called, but he may have sent her a bale of hay and an oat.
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True story?? You mean it's not a joke?
God, I envy your workplace. Wifey horseporn? Nothing happens here.
This reminds me, the first porno I ever saw was that classic one, Cicciolina getting fucked by a horse... I was like seven. No wonder I'm a nutjob.
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"Aren't we just a little ray of fucking sunshine!"
DevilGirl.. If she did eff an horse, I'd be pissed that he showed those pics.. WTF. Damn, poor bitch prob couldn't walk for a fucking month! I bet that dick went in and she could lick the tip w/ her tongue it was so far up.. That is just creepy.. Horse dong is gross to watch even if its w/ another horsey..
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I'm a soldier, I done told ya, don't Make me Fuck you up! Leave your head bust, I'm a head busta, man, I don't give a Fuck!
Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on June 19, 2008 - 7:03am.
Do I even want to know what a blumpkin or a Pasadena Mudslide is?
How bout a Compton Carwash?
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I don't find (Beckham) sexy, but I think he's a grower, like most guys. (Dlister, 6/18/08)
She looks a bit like Kevin Spacey in drag.
I had to look up 'blumpkin' - wish I hadn't now :-P
@Okla- Yeah, true story. The guy was fired for showing the photos around the work place. I don't know if the horse called, but he may have sent her a bale of hay and an oat.
**snifling, wiping tear from eye** Gee. It seems like only last year when this girl looked like she hadn't turned a trick yet. My how time flies.
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Tattoo free since 1952!
14?
That thing looks so aged.
DevilGirl.. No WAY *mouth drops* You're funny!! I hope that horse called her the next day..
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I'm a soldier, I done told ya, don't Make me Fuck you up! Leave your head bust, I'm a head busta, man, I don't give a Fuck!
Do I even want to know what a blumpkin or a Pasadena Mudslide is?
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TimTams Rule!
Submitted by devilgirl on June 19, 2008 - 10:01am
ROFLMAO EEEWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!
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"His name is not 'fat shit cat,' it's Meatball...and he's eating your crab cakes."
♥♥ If you don't talk to your Cat about Catnip, who will? ♥♥
I wonder how much coke she's done already.
I once worked with a guy, who decided to bring his honeymoon photos from Mexico to work one day. He was showing them around to some of the guys who worked with us and asked if I wanted to see them. I trot over to have a look, and you had your basic beach shots, nightclub shots and then the last 10 or so photos were of his wife getting effed by a horse. I told him that the photos didn't speak well of HIS performance on the honeymoon, but the horse and his wife sure looked happy together.
This is what teens look like nowadays. Sad.
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"Aren't we just a little ray of fucking sunshine!"
They should remake "Godzilla". Dina can play the thunder lizard.
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WISH GRANTED! >:)
myspace.com/draya23
I'm guessing the Olsen's turned it down first.
?&!
"Don't get me twisted with average fan losers you have encountered. I am not one of them."
"I am more of a manipulative bitch than a cunt"
"LOVE ANGELINA aka HEART ANGELINA"
She needs to get her "Alice the Goon" nose fixed.
LoLo.. LMAO.. I hate when i have to laugh when I'm at work. Its like, "these reports are so wrong, its funny?"
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I'm a soldier, I done told ya, don't Make me Fuck you up! Leave your head bust, I'm a head busta, man, I don't give a Fuck!
Remake Troll? With Ali Lohan??
"Omigoddddddddd!!!!!!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyophYBP_w4
B.B.,
Scary.
"she's beautiful~ seems like i once saw her personal profile on a horsey people dating site _Riderlove.com_ and she turned out popular there!!haha"
There was an episode of Bones that centered around horsey love!! I thought it was fictional...guess not!
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If I had a dick, I'd go get laid!
She looks OLDER than Lindsay Lohan, and she could probably play Kristin Davis' stunt double for any future 'SATC' movies.
This is her true calling.
www.myspace.com/triston
Stacyfung on June 19, 2008 - 9:45am.
she's beautiful~ seems like i once saw her personal profile on a horsey people dating site _Riderlove.com_ and she turned out popular there!!haha
- This must be where Heidi Montag and Sarah J. Parker found their mates.
?&!
"Don't get me twisted with average fan losers you have encountered. I am not one of them."
"I am more of a manipulative bitch than a cunt"
"LOVE ANGELINA aka HEART ANGELINA"
There is noway Ali is 14, she looks like her moms, slightly younger, chain smoking, ex whore sister!!
~*~I will be
Strong on my own
I will see through the rain
I will find my way
I will keep on
Traveling down the road
Till I finally reach my dream
Till I’m living, and I’m breathing
My destiny, yeah yeah ~ CA, I Will Be~*~
ha for some reason I started reading this as if it was about Alli Sims (Brit's occasional cousin). To be fair, when you think about it, there are many similarities.
Submitted by oklahoma on June 19, 2008 - 9:47am.
StacyFung.. do you have sex w/ animals?? Freak!
i so just peed!
" A horsey people dating site"
im gonna get in trouble laughing this hard shit
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I love you, Cheetos. Mmm Cheetos, I love you so much!
Hopefully, she's playing the "troll," she's got the mug for it.
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MK! I'm here to make all your birthday wishes come true! ~Love, Andy.
She has that haunted look of an alcoholic chain-smoking pill-popping Tri-State Area soccer mom.
StacyFung.. do you have sex w/ animals?? Freak!
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I'm a soldier, I done told ya, don't Make me Fuck you up! Leave your head bust, I'm a head busta, man, I don't give a Fuck!
Oh Blumpkin Tree
Oh Blumpkin Tree
How beautiful your branches is
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I love you, Cheetos. Mmm Cheetos, I love you so much!
Woof woof!! Jesus!
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If I had a dick, I'd go get laid!
Too. Much. Make-up. How much longer until she dyes her hair that unflattering shade of blond that her mom and sister have?
Looks like someone rode her hard but forgot to fling her in the ditch.
www.myspace.com/triston
I finally saw a clip of the Lohan's show, and I couldn't believe the strong Long Island accent. There's nothing wrong with accents, but can Ali speak without it? I frankly can't see her getting very in acting if she cannot.
I think it's safe to say Ali's been doing all her own casting couch stunts.
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"His name is not 'fat shit cat,' it's Meatball...and he's eating your crab cakes."
♥♥ If you don't talk to your Cat about Catnip, who will? ♥♥
she's beautiful~ seems like i once saw her personal profile on a horsey people dating site _Riderlove.com_ and she turned out popular there!!haha
White Oprah must be stopped. I can't take anymore of her hideous spawn. My greatest fear is that the youngest son is next in line to become a star. I want to know, who thinks that they are box office draws? I watched "I Know Who Killed Me" the other night, and it was even worse than I had been told it was.
These girls have no talent.
*Counting weeks until Ali gets her nose done.*
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Shoes are the exclamation point at the end of the fashion statement.
-Laurie Schecter
45-year-old Ali Lohan...
HAHAHAHA!
At first glance, I thought this was one of the Sex In The City broads or a hooker from the Governor of NY scandal.
She should use some Prep H under those eyes.
?&!
"Don't get me twisted with average fan losers you have encountered. I am not one of them."
"I am more of a manipulative bitch than a cunt"
"LOVE ANGELINA aka HEART ANGELINA"
Sure she didn't give em a Pasadena Mudslide?
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I don't find (Beckham) sexy, but I think he's a grower, like most guys. (Dlister, 6/18/08)