Thursday, June 5th 2008
There's No Way This Ho Is Knocked Up
Wonky McValtrex having a baby is the final sign of the apocalypse. The Gods above would not do this to us. The world cannot end. I still haven't done the tango with Phoebe Price underneath a chicken cutlet canopy with Rojo Caliente playing the violin in the background.
Either Benji Madden has some super fatty jizz or Wonky is doing this on purpose for attention. It's probably both!
Wenn
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The thing I hate most about her is that the public obviously hates her. Loathes her, makes fun of her, didn't fall for her "oh, poor me in jail" bullshit or her promises to be a better person afterward. And she still simpers through life without any shame or apology for proving us all right- that she's dumb and empty and pretty much OVER. She will never have a tabloid reign like she did a few years ago. Now she just has to horn in on Nicole's life because of all the positive attention she's gotten from having a baby.
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I hate you all, your mom's a whore.
Submitted by QueenCharisma on June 5, 2008 - 9:54am.
Nicole should bitch slap her. Paris just can't let that girl have anything to herself, can she? So fucking pathetic.
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I agree....with all the crap she sells, she still had to go and "design" handbags- even though her SISTER does.....what a fucking asshole.
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“This feels like my first real marriage. The first one was a show, the second one was a con, and this one is the real deal."
- Charlie Sheen told guests at his wedding
It's just her crabs incubating!
She does look pregnant and she has an almost apologetic look on her face in one photo, but God, please no!
Nicole should bitch slap her. Paris just can't let that girl have anything to herself, can she? So fucking pathetic.
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"Tact is just not saying true stuff - I'll pass."
the world is going to end spend your children's college fund! thaw that turkey now! It's the end of the world! God loves you! he's going to kill you!
;p
All you need in this world is a dirty mind and someone to share it with
whore.
that's all. kthxbi
Could she BE any more pathetic?!
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It's like judging ducks before they become swans...its stupid. -LA
Submitted by poptart_starlet on June 5, 2008 - 9:45am.
from your mouth to God's ears....
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“This feels like my first real marriage. The first one was a show, the second one was a con, and this one is the real deal."
- Charlie Sheen told guests at his wedding
How is it possible to loathe someone that I haven't even met SO MUCH? She's an attention whore (and just a regular whore) without a shred of talent, intelligence, or empathy. But I don't think we have to worry...if she were to ACTUALLY get pregnant, I think her body would spontaneously abort, because it wouldn't be able to handle sharing the spotlight with anybody or anything else. Or the fetus would just say "F*** this...I'm outta here."
Either way...would someone just put her out of my misery already? Thanks!
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Laissez les bon temps roulez!
BABY WONK!!
I wish there was a god and he'd take paris hilton off this earth.
DiamondDawg,
According to Neil Gaiman, they are the 4 bikers now.
LoLo,
angeloonies DEF. Pestilence!
All recovered from your bad Chinese?
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Run! It's the clergy!
Submitted by parissucksliterally on June 5, 2008 - 11:36am.
Farrah, I guess my hair is safe too- I use Kerastase also!
I also avoid rubbing my hair on skank infested genitals, just to be extra careful......lol
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....and that is why i love you..
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ani l'dodi v'dodi li.♥
Submitted by DiamondDawg on June 5, 2008 - 11:32am.
whoa!!!! and then they found the Mark of the Beast - 666 - on the back of his head.
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if a big ole crow follows their car from the hospital after the spawn of Herpes has arrived, and Tinkerbell turns into a big, red-eyed monster dog, i think i'll be quoting Pink Floyd's "good bye, cruel world, i'm leaving you today..."
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ani l'dodi v'dodi li.♥
lol i wish i was paris
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“This feels like my first real marriage. The first one was a show, the second one was a con, and this one is the real deal."
- Charlie Sheen told guests at his wedding
Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on June 5, 2008 - 11:35am.
Yer darn tootin', girlfriend!
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I can say with about 99.54% honesty that I'd rather have a zombie apocalypse than have any spawn of Paris Hilton's roaming the earth.
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To Wong Foo - Thanks for everything.
Love Carrottopelina.
_Submitted by DiamondDawg on June 5, 2008 - 11:35am.
do you guys know who the Four Horsemen are? They are
Pestilence (check)
War (check!)
Famine (check)
Death (check)
You forgot the angeloonies in that list man!
Or is that Pestilence?
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Even Old Man Fonda is sick of this shit.
all you guys need to STFU or I'll throw my CRT at you!
J/K!!!!
Clarisse--sweet! Thanks!
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Cross over children. All are welcome. All welcome. Go into the Light.
Farrah, I guess my hair is safe too- I use Kerastase also!
I also avoid rubbing my hair on skank infested genitals, just to be extra careful......lol
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“This feels like my first real marriage. The first one was a show, the second one was a con, and this one is the real deal."
- Charlie Sheen told guests at his wedding
do you guys know who the Four Horsemen are? They are
Pestilence (check)
War (check!)
Famine (check)
Death (check)
yep. its here alright!
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on June 5, 2008 - 10:32am.
Well, I guess we're ready for those zombies now...
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Yer darn tootin', girlfriend!
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Cross over children. All are welcome. All welcome. Go into the Light.
Submitted by DawnieDawnDawn on June 5, 2008 - 8:31am.
Get back to work or I will rip you that new one we spoke of!
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Awwwww, ok....
[stamping feet]
-☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
“Why do some girls dress like boys?” I replied loudly, “Because of my huge balls.”
Submitted by parissucksliterally on June 5, 2008 - 10:30am.
Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on June 5, 2008 - 8:27am.
lol...Rocky....rooooooaaaad?
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I love the Goonies!
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Me too!
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Cross over children. All are welcome. All welcome. Go into the Light.
She can't even take care of the 17 pets she admitted to having on Letterman! I hate to wish for a violent, gory, leave-a-questionably-corpse DEATH on a bitch, but in this case....
Eh, isn't worth it. Her curse will be to live and be hated and ridiculed for her stupidity, vapidness, racist and elitist attitudes, and hypocrisy.
Rant over, Sluts. Carry on.
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WISH GRANTED! >:)
myspace.com/draya23
YMAtT / PSL,
The Truffle Shuffle, just for you!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltp-PPL_yeY&feature=related
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Run! It's the clergy!
Well, I guess we're ready for those zombies now...
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To Wong Foo - Thanks for everything.
Love Carrottopelina.
Submitted by YesterdaysTrashQueen on June 5, 2008 - 8:29am.
if she is then the kid will always
be able to brag that he was
"born from a jackal"
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whoa!!!! and then they found the Mark of the Beast - 666 - on the back of his head.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on June 5, 2008 - 11:18am.
"Keratin acts as a barrier for viral infections, thus preventing the spread of the disease"
That's why my hair stays infection free every time i'm in L.A! I owe Kerástase bigtime.
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ani l'dodi v'dodi li.♥
MRS. K:
OH HELLZ TO THE NAW.
Get back to work or I will rip you that new one we spoke of!
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We sit side by side in every class;
Teacher thinks that I sound funny
but she likes the way you sing
The world cannot end. I still haven't done the tango with Phoebe Price underneath a chicken cutlet canopy with Rojo Caliente playing the violin in the background.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
BWAHAHAHA, WORD. I still haven't done the tango with MK underneath a Jell-O mold canopy with La Pequena playing the skin flute in the background! This cannot be the end.
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Dlisted's a hellava drug.
"Paris is fucking lame. She's more offensive to me than anything. She's a total, raging, disgusting, rich, lazy party slut. I pray that my daughter will not turn out like her." - Dave Grohl
The first sign of the apocalypse was when she brought Benji over to meet her parents. She looks "knocked up" in these photos to me! Geez, the end is near :(
And in other news tonight....The Four Horsemen were seen galloping across the sky....
I hope not. If so she really piggy backed off Nicole big time.
♡☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆♥♡♥☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆♡
I don't want to be a miserable person who smiles. I really want to be happy when I smile.
Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on June 5, 2008 - 8:27am.
lol...Rocky....rooooooaaaad?
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I love the Goonies!
**************************************************
“This feels like my first real marriage. The first one was a show, the second one was a con, and this one is the real deal."
- Charlie Sheen told guests at his wedding
if she is then the kid will always
be able to brag that he was
"born from a jackal"
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"I love fast and I love hard."-MK
Say it ain't so. Bitch doesn't deserve motherhood. The world doesn't deserve the punishment of mini Paris.
Sign of the Apocalypse
Thursday 08th May 2008
Watch out world - Paris Hilton is getting broody!
The socialite – who has been dating Good Charlotte rocker Benji Madden since February – has revealed that she would like to be pregnant in the next year.
Paris reckons she’ll be a good mom because she has a lot of experience of looking after pets.
The UK’s Sun quotes her as saying, “I have a lot of beautiful animals that I look after and I feel I would have a lot to give my children.”
P.S. Dawnie--I know what I said, but don't,'K?♥
-☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
“Why do some girls dress like boys?” I replied loudly, “Because of my huge balls.”
Wow. This Madden is fuglier than the other one. What is up with this??? And what I really want to know is: Did this guy have herpes BEFORE he boinked Paris, or was he just willing to get them so he could have her love child and forever be attached to Hilton money.
She's not pregnant. It's skinny-girl bloat. Maybe she's on her period? Plus, that material is really unflattering on everyone.
I still find it soooo creepy how she's "in love" and "seriously" involved with her best friend's baby daddy's twin brother. It's kind-of sick how jealous and narcissistic she is, like she couldn't let Nicole have her own life and identity. I wouldn't be surprised if she was puffing out her stomach to incite media speculation of a pregnancy, she's THAT much of a media WHORE.
Wouldn't surprise me. Paris has always tried to one up Nicole.
Paris was ok with doing the simple life as long as Nicole was the sidekick. The moment that Nicole became more popular than Paris she didn't want to do the show anymore.
Nicole gets engaged to that DJ dude, and then all of a sudden Paris turns around and gets engaged to Starving Nachos.
Nicole breaks up with DJ batboy, and then Nachos is out of the picture.
Nicole starts dating Joel Madden and gets knocked up, and then all of a sudden Paris starts hanging out with Benji Madden and talks about wanting a family. This is the same chick who went on record and said that she dumped Starving Nachos because she didn't want a family because she felt as thoug she had plenty of years of partying left to do.
She's so pathetic.
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Cindy McCain...the Crypt Keeper meets Nazi Barbie
Awwwww....Wonky has missed us!!
Nice bloat!
The couple has already made up a myspace tribute page for the little one.
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendI...
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Actually, I'm just the President of the Dungeons and Dragons club here in town.
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lol...Rocky....rooooooaaaad?
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Cross over children. All are welcome. All welcome. Go into the Light.
Lolo:
just go to your happy place.....6/08/2007!
Best Day Ever.
this will be one ugly and fucked up baby....if God Forbid she gets pregnant.
Her jealousy of Nicole is so obvious....
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“This feels like my first real marriage. The first one was a show, the second one was a con, and this one is the real deal."
- Charlie Sheen told guests at his wedding
YMAtT!
Hey you GUYYYYYYYYYYYYS!
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Run! It's the clergy!
Submitted by madam s. on June 5, 2008 - 10:21am.
The lucky bundle of joy is going to be born with Madden's three chins, a saggy Wonk eye, and an STD. Awwww... babies are so precious!
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Madam S.--you mean like this?:
http://image.guardian.co.uk/sys-images/Football/Pix/gallery/2004/05/26/t...
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Cross over children. All are welcome. All welcome. Go into the Light.
Paris with a baby.
That is scary as HELL! She can't even remember she has starving puppies in her closets for fucks sake!!?!?!?!?!?
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Run! It's the clergy!
Submitted by madam s. on June 5, 2008 - 1:21pm.
Deliciously wicked. Yes yes please.