It's Good To Be MiserAlba
MiserAlba is smiling! Hell, we would all be smiling too if we were laying in the pool, pissing and farting as we pleased. Pregnant hos can piss and fart on themselves without judgment.
Speaking of pissing in the pool, when I was a little kid, my friend's pool had water jets in it. Pissing in the jets was one of the greatest things ever. Unfortunately, his dumb bitch of a mom found out that I was giving golden showers to the jets. She told me that they put this special liquid in the pool that would turn my piss bright red, so I shouldn't even think about doing it anymore. That shit scarred me for life!
To this day, I can't even piss in my own bath tub (don't judge) without thinking the water will turn red. Damn her! Okay, that pool story really happened last weekend.
Here's more of MiserAlba pissing in the pool.
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to triscuit...
I recently saw something on tv where they asked people who worked in the swimming pool business if pee activated dye exists. they all said it did not but that people call every year asking for it. :)
Boring.
I loved your pool story!
She looks beautiful. I saw her profile on millionaire&celeb dating site ----"AffluentBachelors.com" ----last week. It is said she is dating young billionaire on that site.
This fucking whore needs a piss enema and a hot mug of farts - or at the very least they could be the nicknames of her children.
well she looks like she's having fun. :)
Submitted by madam s. on June 2, 2008 - 11:30pm.
Your corn flakes are fine though, didn't piss on your corn flakes at all.
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
ahhahahhaa Team V.!
Fucker. On the bright side you helped me find a weak spot in my legal contract... I'm going to update that to be a little more all-inclusive.
On the other bright side... that frozen margarita I made you? Well... I used "your" tray of ice cubes.
I pissed in your ice cube trays.
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Actually laughing out loud.really.that was fucking FUNNY!♥
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"I bet the chief has a bushy moustache. They all do."~~~MK~~~
Submitted by madam s. on June 2, 2008 - 10:39pm.
I pissed in your ice cube trays.
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
Is the "turning the water red/purple" thing true?
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"I bet the chief has a bushy moustache. They all do."~~~MK~~~
If I had a pool I would only let a few of my best friends in it, and I would make them take a lie detector test swearing they would never, ever pee in my pool. I would also make them swear on the Bible, Quran, and Torah while rubbing the belly of a Buddha statue. Also a box set of all 6 seasons of Northern Exposure for the atheists. And then I would make them sign a legally binding contract. I would also have bouncers stand around the pool while they swam keeping their eye out for any suspicious behaviour.
And don't even get me GOING on public hot tubs. *shudder*
i'm disappointed because i wanted alba to be alot fatter than this...
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my new ringtone...hotness...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xsW58hO8Mok
For some strange reason I can't pee in a pool, ocean, nothing, unless i sit on a toilet...I'm such a freak!
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"Hahaha....you are eating my caca and paying for it. Meeeeow." No gracias. MK
Ugh. Hate them. Why couldn't she find someone who's at least hot to freeload off her ass? Cash is a fug.
And may I just remind everyone that while people refrain from peeing in pools (it must be that "special pee-detecting chemical" story, because everyone knows it), the ocean is a HUGE toilet/graveyard
....I really try NOT to think about that, thanks!
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yeah, I said it! what?
She looks so pretty and large sexy. ♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥ She is my favor. I saw her new sexy privacy pho0tos in site ‘’W e a l t h y L o v I n g . c o m ’’. So wonder. She is always dating young billionaire on that site.
Ah to be preggers and pissing in your own seat...!
Your face!
Submitted by yolie on June 2, 2008 - 6:39pm.
And here with that guy she was engaged to:
http://a1259.g.akamai.net/f/1259/5586/5d/images.art.com/images/-/Jessica...
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That would be the man i like to call Starfukker. He so used her to try to further his own career.
http://fuzzygalore.buzznet.com
Submitted by Hekki on June 2, 2008 - 2:19pm.
And may I just remind everyone that while people refrain from peeing in pools (it must be that "special pee-detecting chemical" story, because everyone knows it), the ocean is a HUGE toilet/graveyard. Even if the water is crystal clear, you know that little kids and old people pee in it, and what about all the animals and people that die and decompose in it?
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Very true. In some long-ago Matthew McConaghey thread someone posted here that they prefer washing their hair in the ocean than use shampoo in a shower. Right. Like the salt, seaweed, and everything mentioned in your post is going to clean your hair, not strip it of essential oils and make it smell funky. That post has bothered me ever since!
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The world is full of little people like you
They have to read a book to learn what to do
She looks like a little cholita in this Dark Angel pic. I will never understand this chicks appeal:
http://artfiles.art.com/images/-/Jessica-Alba---Dark-Angel-Photograph-C1...
And here with that guy she was engaged to:
http://a1259.g.akamai.net/f/1259/5586/5d/images.art.com/images/-/Jessica...
Sorry to say, MK - my mom told neighborhood kids and my friends that the water would turn red if they peed in our pool, too. It was a lie to scare them from doing it!
Hell, looks like fun to me, except for the being pregnant part!
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"You better start thinking happy thoughts!"
Submitted by Clarisse on June 2, 2008 - 1:31pm.
Missy,
Didn't Shitney change clothes with people in bars all the time when she was on her bi-polar express rampage?
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Bi-polar express! hahahahhahah
Clarisse, I love your posts...you truly belong here at DListed....lol
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"My ex-wife [Kim Basinger] reaches an almost sexual level of satisfaction when she's in a room full of highpriced lawyers."
- Alec Baldwin
Pissing in pools is never okay--even if it is chlorinated. If you are an adult (or over the age of 5), you have to be a sick, lazy piece of trash to do that. Why do \ome people insist on acting like animals?
There's nothing wrong with pissing in pools...that's why they are chlorinated!! :)
And Jessica is a super bitch. I just hate the sight of her.
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Welcome to White Oprah's School of Puppetry.
Por favor, mantenganse allejado de las puertas.
You see JA around town and she's all sunshine and light (she has a really pretty smile, let me tell ya). The only time she looks miserable is when the paps are crawling all over her.
Kiss,
Fifi
"Self improvement is masturbation. Now self-destruction..."
I think her body looks great........ she's all belly with big boobs!
*Smile Bitches*
Missy,
Didn't Shitney change clothes with people in bars all the time when she was on her bi-polar express rampage?
On point, I'm not wearing anybody else's shoes!!!
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If you've never seen an elephant ski, you've never been on acid.
hahahaa psl :D
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
rickilake:
WHAT? "You MUST give Jessica your shoes?"
How about my 4" stiletto heel up her ass?! Does that count?
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"My ex-wife [Kim Basinger] reaches an almost sexual level of satisfaction when she's in a room full of highpriced lawyers."
- Alec Baldwin
that looks so relaxing! I am so jealous!!
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yeah, I said it! what?
It's a shame that he appears to be a free loader living off of J.Alba. He should be out at least looking for a job instead of floating on his back in a pool. ok! so I'm jealous it ain't me doing the floating in the pool. lol.
http://fuzzygalore.buzznet.com
ricki lake: That's a disgusting story. Thanks for sharing it, though. I LOVE those little tidbdits about celebs I hate.
And may I just remind everyone that while people refrain from peeing in pools (it must be that "special pee-detecting chemical" story, because everyone knows it), the ocean is a HUGE toilet/graveyard. Even if the water is crystal clear, you know that little kids and old people pee in it, and what about all the animals and people that die and decompose in it?
Wow, she doesn't look fat here. I thought her ass and thighs had blown out.
Man, being in a pool when prego is HEAVEN!
Submitted by ricki lake on June 2, 2008 - 2:06pm
OMG you have confirmed suspicions of mine of Alba beig a grade-A twat....
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Submitted by Stock Broker on April 25, 2008 - 12:13pm.
Angeloonie looks like a giant lemon.
Which is fitting since she's a bitter, egotistical wench.
ricki - seriously? how in the fuck do you go around demanding the shoes off peoples feet?!?!
Shit, I need a posse...
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
aw MK! what a cunt that lady was!!! cunty larue!
I told a story the other day about getting kicked out of a hotel for using a fog machine to fog up the hallways and the person I was telling it to was like: "hahahahaa, how old were you when you did that??" and Im like "it was 6 months ago"
water jets in general are fun. no pee required :)
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
LMFAO @ MK's pissing in pools/tub story! I thought I was the only sick bastard who did that.
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"Tact is just not saying true stuff - I'll pass."
So which one was pregnant again?
God Jessica. You'd think if you were going to get knocked up by and marry a moderately-hot, no-name intern/assistant dude off of one of your movie sets, the least you could do is pick one without a gut.
PS Jessica Alba sucks. My friend ran into her and her people at a club a long time ago, while she was on Dark Angel and before she was a household name. Apparently Jessica complimented my friend on her designer shoes, then ASKED for them. As my friend continued to say no (they were her mother's shoes), Jessica's people got involved, telling her "You MUST give Jessica your shoes, or we'll have you thrown out of the club." Neither happened, and, well...Jessica's still a cunt. Fin.
Man, I hated being on my back when I was pregnant. The baby just presses on everything even more that way. Just looking at these photos makes me feel uncomfortable. But being in a pool when you're prego is the BEST.
Can this girl ever NOT be in front of the camera in a bikini??
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A worthy cause: http://dogsindanger.com/ or http://hua.org/
Why oh why did i waste my time commenting on this??
Miseralba = :(
I thought she had on floaties.
If i were in a preggers type of way, id be naked in my pool the entire time.
Like on the weekends.... when im not preggers and naked.... never mind.
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Even Old Man Fonda is sick of this shit.
Jessica Alba bores me to the point where i can't even move myself to comment abou.....DOH!
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If you've never seen an elephant ski, you've never been on acid.
I'm not gona lie, I'm feeling real jealous of them right now sitting here in my cubicle. :(
she looks good and happy, now have her stay at home pregnant and barefooted like all the Mexicans she criticizes and disappear. Who is with me?
Frankly my dear, I don't give a Damn!! "Rhett Butler"
PSL - I doubt it was a shoot. Alba probably paid a pap to take pics of her.
~*~"It's time to make history. It's time to rock the vote." Christina Aguilera in the new Rock The Vote ad that airs in 2 weeks time~*~
Rock The Vote
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5y0bdOqL3AI
Way to start that baby off on the right path to skin cancer, MOM.
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♥♥ If you don't talk to your Cat about Catnip, who will? ♥♥
Okay, that pool story really happened last weekend.
LMAO