MiserAlba As Charlie Chaplin
MiserAlba dressed as Charlie Chaplin for June's Allure magazine. The hell? That's like Michael Vick dressing as Scooby Doo or Paris Hilton dressing as a condom. MiserAlba looks more like Skeletor than Chaplin.
People has a few quotes from the interview:
On Sex Before Marriage: "I never believed women had to be virgins when they got married, or that a woman has to fall in love with a guy just because they're having sex. I don't think sex is a big deal. I hated the hypocrisy of it. Men can do whatever, and it's acceptable."
Translation: She's a slut!
On Her Steamy Public Image: "[Hollywood] always play[s] up your sexuality, because that's what gets men into the theaters. And I never really gave a shit about all that stuff! It's nothing to be ashamed of. But it is definitely not what I am about by any means!"
Translation: She's a grouchy slut!
On Owning Her Sexuality: "I don't think I was comfortable with my sexuality until I was an adult, probably, like, 22 – that's when I stopped apologizing and stopped feeling ashamed. I did the Vagina Monologues in L.A. That made me proud."
Translation: She's a deep-thinking, grouchy slut!
Oh, the ripe old age of 22, huh? What a dumb slut.
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A video movie could improve your life.
Jessica never has anything intelligent or interesting to say. Boring!
In Fantastic Four Part I and II piece of CGI craps, she wears a horrible blond wig and blue contacts and talks like super white bread. Plus her brother in the movie is a blond wasp. Her acting sucked as usual. Once again I saw why some in the Latino community think she's a sell out hack.
Why didn't they ask her what does she think about a woman that gets pregnant, just to keep her douche boyfriend?
Submitted by walker
My boyfriend and I lived by the "don't be here when the sun comes up" code for years and it was great. Got to wake up w/o the instant worry of morning breath, could scratch ass and lay in bed for no reason if I wanted, and the bathroom didn't depend on who got to work first!
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Lampwick, hmph! Lampwick! Burns me up after all I tried to do for him. Who's his conscience, anyway? Me or that hoodlum Lampwick? Well, I've had enough of this. I'm takin' the next boat outta here... ~Jiminy
Ok we get. You're a slut c*ck tease, but you don't want to be considered sexy even though you're quick to pose half naked in all the guys magazines and accept sexy movie roles where you flash your underwear and talk about having threesomes.
Yeah I see what you mean Alba. I hate the hypocrisy of...YOU actually!
thesun.co.uk — Actress Jessica Alba says she is up for a one-night stand —as long as the man leaves the next morning. She told Cosmopolitan magazine:
"I just wanted to see what it was like to be with different people. I don't think a girl's a slut if she enjoys sex."
“I could have a one-night stand, and I’m the kind of girl who looks over in the morning and is like, ‘Do you really have to be here?’ I don’t need to cuddle and do all that stuff because I know what it is and I don’t try to make it more.
========This bitch is just so full of herself. She sucks. You just have to read between the lines in her interviews. She just oozes arrogance.
Here's this other quote from her.
"I'm excited for my baby to be brown. I just have to believe the dark gene is going to survive. Cash and I are like, please."
Translation: I'm half white. Not 100% latina. I just had to bring that up, since I am an arrogant, hypocritical b*tch who is trying to not be to obvious about it.
What she captures is Cantiflas not Charlie Chaplin..this chick is a beaner like me, she can't escape it... eDataJob.com
"I did the Vagina Monologues in L.A. That made me proud."
And it made Eve Ensler weep.
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Everyday is a winding road
I get a little bit closer
Everyday is a faded sign
I get a little bit closer 2 feelin' fine
She's not a slut, but she is a pretentious, self-involved, talentless starlet. Her body was her fortune.
Sensimina, I am forseeing a Demi Moore-esque naked heavily pregnant shoot for a magazine..only with that porno expression she loves to pull.
What a cunt! It's bad enough that she dressed up as Mia Farrow in Rosemary's Baby and Janet Leigh in Psycho. Stop it, you emotionless scank!
What a cunt! It's bad enough that she dressed up as Mia Farrow in Rosemary's Baby and Janet Leigh in Psycho. Stop it, you emotionless scank!
It looks like Melissa Milano more than Alba.
~~The world's largest sink hole~~
EmmaB - You are exactly right. But you know she's never gonna do that. Two days after she pops out her brown baby, she will be busting ass in the gym preparing for her next FHM shoot.
This girl really gets off on herself.
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http://www.myspace.com/rainbowsrule
Your [sic] an idiot. How is putting a scorpoin [sic] down your pants being a slut? IDIOT
Submitted by Jesus on May 13, 2008 - 11:15am.
She looks nothing like Charlie Chaplin nor does she capture his spirit in this photo. What a terrible choice.
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Just like the Blohan/Marilyn Monroe shoot
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Sensimina, I see what you mean. I was thinking more of all that money she has makin crappy movies, if she hated Hollywood that much she could buy a house in the middle of nowhere, stop making movies, stop taking 'sexy' pictures and spend her days getting fat in front of the TV. Good times.
EmmaB, somehow I don't think MiserAlba is that lucky. My ass isn't as nice as hers and I've never posed for Maxim, but at least I have a stand-up man that doesn't cheat on me, and whom I don't have to trap with a pregnancy to get him to hang around. Oh yeah, and I don't have to financially support him. That's just me, though.
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http://www.myspace.com/rainbowsrule
Your [sic] an idiot. How is putting a scorpoin [sic] down your pants being a slut? IDIOT
No problemo, missy. I'm usually all for sisterhood and supporting my fellow woman...but this laydee needs a big slap and to realise just how lucky she is to have what she has.
She is my favorite actress. Her blog and photos were found at milllionaire and celebrity datingsite -"W e a l t h yR o m a n c e .c o m"---- last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is seeking on that site.
Submitted by EmmaB on May 13, 2008 - 11:23am.
I'm a sex symbol and I hate it, even though I pose for all male masturbation fodder magazines! No-one takes me seriously as an actress, even though I do thought provoking Academy Award worthy stuff like Good Luck Chuck and Honey!
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Thank you for the telling and accurate translation, Emma
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"Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke."
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Submitted by EmmaB on May 13, 2008 - 11:23am.
I'm a sex symbol and I hate it, even though I pose for all male masturbation fodder magazines! No-one takes me seriously as an actress, even though I do thought provoking Academy Award worthy stuff like Good Luck Chuck and Honey!
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Thank you for the telling and accurate translation, Emma
_____________________________________________
"Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke."
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
I'm a sex symbol and I hate it, even though I pose for all male masturbation fodder magazines! No-one takes me seriously as an actress, even though I do thought provoking Academy Award worthy stuff like Good Luck Chuck and Honey!
She looks nothing like Charlie Chaplin nor does she capture his spirit in this photo. What a terrible choice.
I'd like to give her the benefit of the doubt, but she really does seem like a miserable cow.
I don't think MiserAlba's face is that pretty. She has a sick body, but so do a lot of women with prettier faces. Maybe I just find her face hideous because she talks about herself like she is cursed with such extreme beauty that she can barely live her life, and that's a huge exaggeration.
She's no Shauna Sand.
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http://www.myspace.com/rainbowsrule
Your [sic] an idiot. How is putting a scorpoin [sic] down your pants being a slut? IDIOT
Submitted by parissucksliterally on May 13, 2008 - 11:26am.
well, so much for lunch... thanks, PSL!LOL!
OT: oh yeah, and her "acting" is atrocious
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"Someday I'll wish upon a star.
Wake up where the clouds are far behind me.
Where trouble melts like lemon drops,
high above the chimney tops, that's where you'll find me."
ESE:
like your women more of a Norma Stitz type- eh?
hehehhehhehe
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“Why? Why? Why?... Be more constructive with your criticism.”
-Jemaine. 'Flight of The Conchords'
Submitted by parissucksliterally on May 13, 2008 - 11:20am.
nope, just doesn't do it for me
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"Someday I'll wish upon a star.
Wake up where the clouds are far behind me.
Where trouble melts like lemon drops,
high above the chimney tops, that's where you'll find me."
Can one fucking day go by where this girl doesn't bitch about how "sexy" she is? PLEASE. Why doesn't she ever bitch about her loser golddigging errand-boy boyfriend who cheats on her everytime she turns around? For someone who is supposedly so sexy and desirable, she really has an embarrassingly pathetic lovelife.
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http://www.myspace.com/rainbowsrule
Your [sic] an idiot. How is putting a scorpoin [sic] down your pants being a slut? IDIOT
From the looks of that picture, bitch best start being ashamed again.
Really ESE?
Not even her fabulous ass?
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“Why? Why? Why?... Be more constructive with your criticism.”
-Jemaine. 'Flight of The Conchords'
Why does she keep giving interviews?
its annoying
http://www.momsword.org
never understood the fascination of this woman, nor do i understand how someone soo dense keeps being interviewed for their opinion
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"Someday I'll wish upon a star.
Wake up where the clouds are far behind me.
Where trouble melts like lemon drops,
high above the chimney tops, that's where you'll find me."
"Paris Hilton dressing as a condom"
that would be the closest Paris gets to one
I agree Bradiful. For someone who doesn't want to be only seen as sexy, she sure struts around in a bikini a lot.
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“Why? Why? Why?... Be more constructive with your criticism.”
-Jemaine. 'Flight of The Conchords'
According to MK:
Miseralba looks like Skeletor....
Skeletor played Hector Lavoe in El Cantante
one of Hector's album covers looked like this:
http://images.coveralia.com/audio/h/Hector_Lavoe-Comedia-Frontal.jpg
She seems to care a lot about what men think about her.
The Vagina Monologues, is that supposed to be a badge of honor and validate and excuse her hypocrisy?
?&!
"I just watch porn I don't masturbate."
"Just be advised Nicky half of these bitches are mean so be careful dear."
"LOVE ANGELINA"
Ooh! Miseralba's got an opinion on sex. I'm so excited.
*crickets*
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"If time had a place, a space for your past/Like a little novel I wanted to read again and again/Would I be in your novel?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MVGgGW1ZalY
last translation: 100% liar
Frankly my dear, I don't give a Damn!! "Rhett Butler"
Where's her pencil cup so I can drop a few nickles in it?
Having her dress up like Charlie Chaplin is a insult to all silent movie actors...but, on the other hand, she would make a great silent actress. She should NEVER, EVER speak.
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Stock Broker is now Stock BrokerLINA.
“We are not convinced that this individual has anything to offer in the way of insightful reflection.”
Translation:
We don’t give a flying latina baby on what comes out of your mouth.
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Note to dumb illiterate skank: Don't were a scarf as a top and call it a custom made dress - Lor 12/05/2008
push grouchy wentch in moat
and laff at her
she sey oh help me!
we say NO! we laff at you in moat! HA HA
i dont think alba is a "slut" but she is partly responsible for her sex pot image.
case in point, all those men's magazines alba posed for- that was HER choice.
alba did sue playboy for using her image for one of their issues, but she willingly posed for maxim and some other crappy men's magazine.
i hardly think a meryll streep would pose for a maxim magazine when she was young and firmer!
i do not believe the men who read maxim are very much interested in jessica alba's career development as an actor.
alba looks like prince in the chaplin drag.
Jesus H. Twirly-Cane Christ, this abomination should shut her gaping pie hole.
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The world is full of little people like you
They have to read a book to learn what to do
Whatever. She talks a lot of shit
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The greatest woman in history is Ms.Pacman.
For 25 cents the bitch swallows balls until she dies. Now that's a bad bitch!
She gave up the coochie when she was probably 12 or 13
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"Money is the magic wand that turns many a frog into a prince" - ChubbyWubby
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She is my favorite actress. Her blog and photos were found at milllionaire&celeb datingsite ------"W e a l t h yR o m a n c e .c o m"---- last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is seeking on that site.
Parissucks
WORD!
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"This IS Marge's bra! I brought it for her boobs!"
Homer S.
Shut up.
Just SHUT UP.
Why does she get interviewed? It's not like anone wants to hear her speak- she's just eye candy.
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“Why? Why? Why?... Be more constructive with your criticism.”
-Jemaine. 'Flight of The Conchords'