Sunday, May 11th 2008
Wino Of The Woods
For just a dollar a day you can sponsor a child in need... I wish I could sponsor this child! I would take her ass on a Michael K eating tour. We would hit IHOP, Outback, Bennigan's and Cracker Barrell. You know, all the fine establishments. The girl also needs a few days in the tank followed by a couple of coffee enemas to bring down that tweeker bloat.
Here's Amy Wino and her friends were hanging out in a park near her recording studio in London yesterday. They look like a bunch of mangy children of the woods that wait behinds trees to attack the innocent and steal their coins to buy candy. They totally communicate through grunts.
Pacific Coast News, Splash
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She only eats food that she hunts down and kills herself. The pretzel kicked her ass.
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Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Submitted by ESE on May 11, 2008 - 11:14pm.
AAAHHH!!! D-A'S SWEARING!!!.... *curling into fetal position in corner*..... i didn't hear it.. i didn't see it...
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Oh, shit! *lifting skirt slightly* Don't peek! *kicking you lightly with my stiletto* Get up off the floor, ESE. It's not the end of the fucking world. Yes, I said TWO swear words! LOL
"Anything you can't get out of a bottle of vodka, you don't need."..........
Ava Gardner......
Okay, this bytch is scurring me now! Somebody call the Health Department!
www.jhazzaisworld.wordpress.com
Submitted by Team Valtrex on May 11, 2008 - 11:15pm.
I understand now why she's so emaciated. In the 3rd thumbnail, shirtless druggie loser #1 is eating the pretzel rod that was supposed to feed her for the next 3 weeks.
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She didn't want it. It wasn't coated with "crack" sprinkles!
Hello, TV.
"Anything you can't get out of a bottle of vodka, you don't need."..........
Ava Gardner......
I understand now why she's so emaciated. In the 3rd thumbnail, shirtless druggie loser #1 is eating the pretzel rod that was supposed to feed her for the next 3 weeks.
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Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Submitted by dead-actress on May 11, 2008 - 11:11pm.
AAAHHH!!! D-A'S SWEARING!!!.... *curling into fetal position in corner*..... i didn't hear it.. i didn't see it...
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"But I would not give you false hope,
on this strange and mournful day.
When the mother and child reunion,
is only a motion away."
Why the fuck (yeah, I said it) is she running? She doesn't need to burn any calories! Does crack have calories?
"Anything you can't get out of a bottle of vodka, you don't need."..........
Ava Gardner......
come on, wino... you took the Kate Moss look too far... Doperty will hang with ya if ya got an extra hit, settle it down now
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"But I would not give you false hope,
on this strange and mournful day.
When the mother and child reunion,
is only a motion away."
Wino was on the phone trying to set up an interview with Skeletor Magazine. They said she was too skinny.
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Submitted by Manimal5 on May 11, 2008 - 10:57pm.
She has a guest appearance coming up on "Bones" and "COPS" and "Intervention" and "Women Behind Bars" and "Dancing With The Stars". Yeah, I made the last one up.
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Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Submitted by Team Valtrex on May 11, 2008 - 10:47pm.
I'd have to worry about the giant, mutant earthworms that are resistant to every type of chemical warfare and high on PCP.
if they take after wino, just put a bar of soap outside any doors or windows... you're good
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"But I would not give you false hope,
on this strange and mournful day.
When the mother and child reunion,
is only a motion away."
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on May 11, 2008 - 10:45pm.
I'd have to worry about the giant, mutant earthworms that are resistant to every type of chemical warfare and high on PCP.
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Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Submitted by FritoDorito on May 11, 2008 - 10:40pm.
Wino is now among a select group of women who have the power to make straight men consider homosexuality.
~~~~~~~~
Hello, sweet girl!
ON T: One group of men might actually be attracted to the boy body for those reasons and another will be so repulsed by this female form...they'll turn..gay.
"Anything you can't get out of a bottle of vodka, you don't need."..........
Ava Gardner......
Submitted by Team Valtrex on May 11, 2008 - 10:42pm.
My dog wants to bury her in the backyard, but I'm concerned about contaminating the groundwater
at least everyone would get a free buzz
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"But I would not give you false hope,
on this strange and mournful day.
When the mother and child reunion,
is only a motion away."
She's actually running AWAY from the ice cream truck.
***********************************************
Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Wino's not really running in the main pic. She was just practicing her flamingo routine.
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My dog wants to bury her in the backyard, but I'm concerned about contaminating the groundwater.
***********************************************
Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Wino is now among a select group of women who have the power to make straight men consider homosexuality.
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Geez Banana shut your friggin' gob, okay?
Submitted by Team Valtrex on May 11, 2008 - 10:32pm.
What? I'm confident that you checked too.
HAHAHA!! that's just wrong on soo many levels!!!
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"But I would not give you false hope,
on this strange and mournful day.
When the mother and child reunion,
is only a motion away."
hehehhehehe...tv!
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"Just to show him how it feels, I walk past his desk in heels- One leg resting on the chair, from the side he pulls my hair"
-Amy Winehouse
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on May 11, 2008 - 10:30pm.
What? I'm confident that you checked too.
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Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Submitted by Team Valtrex on May 11, 2008 - 10:28pm.
*checking Florida age of consent*
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lol
"Anything you can't get out of a bottle of vodka, you don't need."..........
Ava Gardner......
Submitted by Team Valtrex on May 11, 2008 - 10:28pm.
*checking Florida age of consent*
yeah, thanks for the vote of confidence there, TV!
-----------------------------
"But I would not give you false hope,
on this strange and mournful day.
When the mother and child reunion,
is only a motion away."
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on May 11, 2008 - 10:23pm.
now, if this is the dumb shite "normal, everyday" people are doing... where does that place the good ol' wino in the scheme of things?.... yeah, i got back on topic, oh yeah, i'm that good!LOL!...
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I trust you to always connect the dots and make it all about staying on topic...yeah, right!! lol
As for the kiss on the hand...FINALLY!! I thought I'd have to re-emphasize I used a lint brush or adjust the derringer under my garter!! *wink* Ha!
"Anything you can't get out of a bottle of vodka, you don't need."..........
Ava Gardner......
*checking Florida age of consent*
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Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on May 11, 2008 - 7:26pm.
Because we know the fine citizens of Seminole do not allow juvie crime.
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To all the kids out there who sometimes don't get along with their moms: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJRqJl_-tJY
Submitted by Sheeps on May 11, 2008 - 10:20pm.
When ESE says she used to work for him, he means tricks.
HEY!!... do the math Sheeps!!!... she worked for me when she was 16!!!... no checkin' the wool at that age!!
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"But I would not give you false hope,
on this strange and mournful day.
When the mother and child reunion,
is only a motion away."
Submitted by Sheeps on May 11, 2008 - 10:20pm.
Umm, she was 15 years old 7 years ago. Is her last name Cyrus?
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Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Sheeps, I was wondering what she "did" for ESE when she was 15 yrs old.....lol
TV- please, please can I read it? I'm very curious now....
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"Just to show him how it feels, I walk past his desk in heels- One leg resting on the chair, from the side he pulls my hair"
-Amy Winehouse
Submitted by dead-actress on May 11, 2008 - 10:18pm.
now, if this is the dumb shite "normal, everyday" people are doing... where does that place the good ol' wino in the scheme of things?.... yeah, i got back on topic, oh yeah, i'm that good!LOL!...
BTW, *kiss on the hand*.... DAMNIT!! off topic again!!
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"But I would not give you false hope,
on this strange and mournful day.
When the mother and child reunion,
is only a motion away."
Submitted by parissucksliterally on May 11, 2008 - 10:16pm.
I love reading stories about elderly people who kick ass. It's great.
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I'm not letting you read my diary.
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Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
When ESE says she used to work for him, he means tricks.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
To all the kids out there who sometimes don't get along with their moms: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJRqJl_-tJY
Submitted by ESE on May 11, 2008 - 10:04pm.
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Oh, ESE! That story made me laugh out loud! Wow. The people you know. lol
"Anything you can't get out of a bottle of vodka, you don't need."..........
Ava Gardner......
I love reading stories about elderly people who kick ass. It's great.
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"Just to show him how it feels, I walk past his desk in heels- One leg resting on the chair, from the side he pulls my hair"
-Amy Winehouse
She came back without the stick, I guess "fetch" isn't among her "talents".
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Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Submitted by Sheeps on May 11, 2008 - 10:08pm.
ESE: At his age, that old guy needs a handgun and some hollowpoints. No rolling around with intruders.
that was the HIlarious thing, i saw him interviewed on the evening news, he said somthing like "I just tapped her, I didn't want to kill her" and they asked him "What lesson do you think she learned?".... funny as hell!... he said "Don't mess with the seniors"!!
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"But I would not give you false hope,
on this strange and mournful day.
When the mother and child reunion,
is only a motion away."
ESE: At his age, that old guy needs a handgun and some hollowpoints. No rolling around with intruders.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
To all the kids out there who sometimes don't get along with their moms: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJRqJl_-tJY
Submitted by parissucksliterally on May 11, 2008 - 10:01pm.
i'm tellin' ya!!... i checked up on her a while ago and she's (of course) screwed up on dope shootin'(this makes it on topic) and been arrested like 6 times in 2 years!!
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"But I would not give you false hope,
on this strange and mournful day.
When the mother and child reunion,
is only a motion away."
ESE, that is hilarious. I especially love how they printed her address and vital statistics. Dumb bitch is right!
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But then again, what do I know?
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on May 11, 2008 - 9:56pm.
Hahaha.
Those rubber gloves must have tasted pretty good.
I don't think I would touch Wino even with rubber gloves.
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ESE, that is so funny- you know some crazy bitches....
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"Just to show him how it feels, I walk past his desk in heels- One leg resting on the chair, from the side he pulls my hair"
-Amy Winehouse
why has Wino never made "Dumb Bitch of the Day"?.... speaking of dumb bitch of the day...
http://www.tampabay.com/news/publicsafety/crime/article499085.ece .... added bonus.... she used to work for me about 7 yrs ago!
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"But I would not give you false hope,
on this strange and mournful day.
When the mother and child reunion,
is only a motion away."
Submitted by Manimal5 on May 11, 2008 - 9:18pm.
I didn't know skeletons could run like that.
Someone get her on an IV. Stat!
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When she runs - you don't hear her gasping for breath, you hear her bones rattling & knocking up against each other around inside that skin.
"Anything you can't get out of a bottle of vodka, you don't need."..........
Ava Gardner......
Submitted by Team Valtrex on May 11, 2008 - 9:27pm.
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Seriously. One of my girlfriends saw Iggy last year and said she was exhausted just watching him perform. I doubt we could say the same about Wino, unless you count swaying from side to side.
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But then again, what do I know?
Golly gee, she sure is pretty!
"I've got hampers of ironing to do and my diet pill is wearin' off."
Submitted by islandgirl on May 11, 2008 - 9:26pm.
Except Iggy saw his 30th birthday.
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Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
It's probably been said before, but she's the female version of Iggy Pop. Only Iggy's hair is healthier.
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But then again, what do I know?
In other news, Keira Knightley called Amy a "fat cow".
***********************************************
Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
I didn't know skeletons could run like that.
Someone get her on an IV. Stat!
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teea in da win
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"In other news, a bubble gum wrapper blew across Santa Monica Blvd."-Deb