Michael Lohan Is Just Jealous
Michael Lohan is totally jelly that he doesn't have a "Father of the Year" plaque from the 99 cent store hanging over his broken radiator. White Oprah was honored for her superb parent skills by Mingling Moms earlier this week and Michael thinks it's a joke.
He blasted off to Page Six about it, "Are you kidding! Top celebrity mom? Look at her off-screen antics, her lack of morals and how she conducts herself. I guess they forgot to mention how this top super-mom leaves her kids alone at night and even parties in their presence. Just wait until we go back to court. She comes stumbling out of Butter at 3:15 a.m. with bloodshot eyes and a red runny nose, yelling 'Oh, [bleep],' when she saw the paparazzi."
Um...that's exactly what a top celebrity mom does. I'm sure there's a handbook somewhere that states you must come stumbling out of a club with bloodshot eyes, cursing at the paps at least once a week.
White Oprah pulled out the jelly card when she responded to Michael's rant, "He's jealous that I got the award. He even called the organizers and tried to talk them out of giving it to me." The organizers probably responded with, "Sorry. We already cashed her check." Take that Michael!
She also said she has a restraining order on his ass until 2011, but she's afraid he will break the order by trying to contact her directly. "I'm getting nervous. Lindsay came to town two weeks ago and wanted security guys there in case he showed up. His parole officer needs to see what he's doing and realize that he cannot address me directly or indirectly. He wears a tracking device and they'll know if he comes anywhere near me. He's on a mission to destroy me."
Paranoid much? Sweetie needs to lay off the white grains. It's effing with her brains and her nose. Seriously, I could shove a Hummer up those nostrils.
Here's some pictures of Mother of the Year, White Oprah, with her 35-year-old daughter at the Candies Foundation Benefit in NYC last night. Ali Lohan looks like she had a little filler put in, but I'm sure it's natural. White Oprah put a little coke on her lips to plump them up a bit. There's no way she'd let her daughter get injected with filler. She's a top mom!
Wenn
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looks like they've BOTH had nose jobs.
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http://www.myspace.com/naervana
i just love dina's nose -- it's the funniest thing !
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http://pocagentesabe.com
She should load up on laxatives and see if she can squeeze out a baby sister for Lindsay.
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Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
Submitted by BeigeBaby on May 8, 2008 - 8:14pm.
Thank you.
Just so we understand each other young lady, Bunny Kravitz doesn't change her avie for anybody but herself.
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DEEDLE DOOT DOO DEE DEE, LET'S ALL GO TO CAT TOWN
Mrs. Kravitz, I must say, your new avie rocks
DEFINATE left eye wonk! Also, whats up with WO's michael jackson nose job? SCARY! Also, poor Ali she already looks like a used up old coke whore...guess the apple doesnt fall far from the tree....
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Thank you for flying Church of England, cake or death?
Look, White Oprah, you are WAAYYYYYY too old for that hair. Give it up.
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"Ahhhhh....youth is wasted on the wrong people!"
That she has chewed her cuticle to the point of bleeding makes me think that Ali's Alligator mouth has overloaded her hummingbird's ass.
Dina will NEVER let the new meal ticket go...
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As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two...
Is it just me or do i detect a hint of wonk in Ali's left eye?
How does a 15-year-old get wrinkles like that? I hope she doesn't have that weird aging disease. Wait a minute, yes I do.
do they wear thrown away clothes from What Not To Wear? I mean that dress - are they trying to hide the skank? Or does Momsy tell Ali that she has to dress older so Momsy can look younger? They don't have to worry about a career for Ali, they just pimp her to hard-up Six Flags execs (b/c the Disney execs get the b-list hos).
I want to smack all that make up, fake contacts and restalyne off of Ali's face. I can't even feel sorry for her because I know that being that cheap at 14 is genetic, not learned.
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Submitted by Stock Broker on April 25, 2008 - 12:13pm.
Angeloonie looks like a giant lemon.
Which is fitting since she's a bitter, egotistical wench.
It looks like Ali Lohan has already had lip injections. White Oprah is a disgrace to humanity to say the least.
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on May 8, 2008 - 1:43pm.
yeah, like virginity is still on the table there
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True dat
Submitted by City Barbie on May 8, 2008 - 1:37pm.
Why doesn't White Oprah just take her out on a street corner and sell her virginity to the highest bidder?
yeah, like virginity is still on the table there
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"Keep on runnin' through the gates of the city.
To give up now would be such a pity.
Don't you wanna see the ship go down with me?"
Aliho is already slutting it up for mama. Why doesn't White Oprah just take her out on a street corner and sell her virginity to the highest bidder? That's what she's doing here anyways!
Oh Sweet Jesus Lord....
lindsay's sis is prettier than her.
dead fish eyes and a nose like Michael Jackson. ewww. throw it back!!
He blasted off to Page Six about it, "Are you kidding! Top celebrity mom? Look at her off-screen antics, her lack of morals and how she conducts herself. I guess they forgot to mention how this top super-mom leaves her kids alone at night and even parties in their presence. Just wait until we go back to court. She comes stumbling out of Butter at 3:15 a.m. with bloodshot eyes and a red runny nose, yelling 'Oh, [bleep],' when she saw the paparazzi."
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wow, Michael Lohan is so spiritually enlightened
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"Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke."
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
MK, can you start using pictures of fuzzy little pussies in your Dina Lohan posts? I know you enjoy reporting on her, but damn she's hard on the eyes.
Submitted by Bossy on May 8, 2008 - 10:23am.
Ali needs to take out those fake contacts. The look sooo obvious
*shiver*
I live in the dark underworld and even *I* think it's creepy. She's totally a zombie.
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.o.we're all pink on the inside.o.
a tergo ad libitum
White Oprah really needs to stop with the fake as tracks. God forbid she gets too close to a ciggy; bitch would go up like a Roman candle. ==============
Cindy McCain...the Crypt Keeper meets Nazi Barbie
Imagination is more Important than Knowledge
Her nose job looks awful, it makes her face look pinched and her ringlet hair.... shes just too old to be sporting ringlets. That woman is Nasty.
I wonder how much money Dina has stolen from Linds. Dina probably didn't put any of the money in a trust for her.
That's a lawsuit waiting to happen.
I think maybe the whole issue is that the real name of the org should be "Meddling Moms"
Then, everyone would be satisfied.
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.o.we're all pink on the inside.o.
a tergo ad libitum
Id be Benecie's Ho but then i would be conflicted as to if i liked it or not!
I will tell you, i dated an ugly man who could *&^&*^*&* like a %other *ucker and he totally %$$#@@### my socks off!
Sometimes ugly is fun! ha ha ha
awwwww that was so wrong!
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"Go stuff that pie hole you fat idiot Tyra!"
4/29/08 Random kid on the train.
I wonder if Dina has her latest cash cow on birth control.
Actually, Ali will need "Barf Control" for that gag reflex while she's working hard on her "career".
LoLo - ME TOO! What is it about him that is so weirdly yummy???
<(*.*<) ^(*.*)^ (>*.*)>
I'm only going to heaven if it feels like hell.
@ Viva
I know I know.
Its like me and Benecio.
I fuckling love hate his beautiful ugly ass.
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"Go stuff that pie hole you fat idiot Tyra!"
4/29/08 Random kid on the train.
You hear that folks? I TELLS THE TROOF! No but really, I hate the ringlets with a passion and the Lohans are shitheads. I have a sick perverse love/hate thing for Lindsay, that's my personal cross to bear, but the rest of her family are just disgusting.
<(*.*<) ^(*.*)^ (>*.*)>
I'm only going to heaven if it feels like hell.
_Submitted by Viva La Lohan on May 8, 2008 - 12:06pm.
It's gross and offensive.
Baby, that is the BEST way to describe the entire family! Truth Teller!
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"Go stuff that pie hole you fat idiot Tyra!"
4/29/08 Random kid on the train.
LoLo all of those Lohan hoes sport that look. It's gross and offensive. I haven't seen a real-life person with that shit in a looooong while.
<(*.*<) ^(*.*)^ (>*.*)>
I'm only going to heaven if it feels like hell.
_Submitted by Viva La Lohan on May 8, 2008 - 11:59am.
what's up on those ringlets?
Classic Lawn Guyland tramp hair.
Gum snappin nasal talkin trash
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"Go stuff that pie hole you fat idiot Tyra!"
4/29/08 Random kid on the train.
what's up on those ringlets?
<(*.*<) ^(*.*)^ (>*.*)>
I'm only going to heaven if it feels like hell.
She looks like Asslee Simpon's much older sister.
Ali looks like an ex-wife of a drug mule.
Look at this photo of Ashlee Simpson, http://www.imdb.com/media/rm446994432/nm1249883
she looks just like Ali
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"Money is the magic wand that turns many a frog into a prince" - ChubbyWubby
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They both look like drugged out dudes in drag. Rough.
Chubby maybe a little but Ashlee never had her hair that long before the nose job. So about half and half.
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Et tu ne le comprends pas
Tu le gardes satisfaisant
Et tu apprends l'accepter
Tu sais que c'est assez pathétique. - Local H
QUESTION TO BOARD:
Doesn't the third thumbnail of Ali look just like Ashlee Simpson BEFORE her nose job????
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"Money is the magic wand that turns many a frog into a prince" - ChubbyWubby
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chola lips, 7 dollar walmart extentions...
xxx
well, just like Lindsay, Ali's gonna need those lips for a career.... what does she think? Dina's gonna do EVERYTHING for her?
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"Keep on runnin' through the gates of the city.
To give up now would be such a pity.
Don't you wanna see the ship go down with me?"
Ali's got Loretta Lynn hair.
"You Ain't Woman Enough (To Take My Man)"
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No one can defend me, because I am so out there no one would ever see things from my point of view.
Alli got the Miley Cyrus make over in box.
Next, a tramp stamp and re-hab.
?&!
"I just watch porn I don't masturbate."
"Just be advised Nicky half of these bitches are mean so be careful dear."
"LOVE ANGELINA"
i refuse to believe either one of these things is under 40...
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that's twice you called me stupid...well that's twice you answered...
She comes stumbling out of Butter at 3:15 a.m. with bloodshot eyes and a red runny nose, yelling 'Oh, TAKE MY PICTURE' when she saw the paparazzi."
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No one can defend me, because I am so out there no one would ever see things from my point of view.
Ali's hair is cute though. I love it.
♡☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆♥♡♥☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆♡
Et tu ne le comprends pas
Tu le gardes satisfaisant
Et tu apprends l'accepter
Tu sais que c'est assez pathétique. - Local H
Both are sporting fugly, budget waves.
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Rise against $cientology - MAY 10th - worldwide protest. Also in your city.
http://www.enturbulation.org/
http://forums.enturbulation.org/82-may-10th-protest/
It's tough to choose who is the grossest in this family. It's such a tight race.
And mike... "Diddling Dads"!