Thank You Rebecca Miller

At least someone got the damn memo! Last night Oscars was a red carpet filled with oatmeal, but thankfully Daniel Day-Lewis' wife, Rebecca Miller, stepped up to the plate to be the evening's worst dressed. She has saved the day! It's like she had nothing to wear only hours before the ceremony, so she ran into Michael's crafts and bought everything in sight and then superglued that shit on a tablecloth. Her shoes were made out of a picnic blanket.

The black crystal thing on her breasts would make the best Christmas tree topper. It probably IS a Christmas tree topper.