Friday, February 15th 2008

Kirstie Alley Is Out Of A Job

Kirstie Alley is no longer working for Jenny Craig. She's been their main bitch for the past 3 years. The VP of marketing of Jenny Craig told People, "Although Kirstie will not appear in future advertising endeavors for us, she does remain on Jenny Craig's maintenance program and is confident that our program has helped her incorporate positive lifestyle changes that should last a lifetime." Uh...huh. He should've just said, "She's a crazy alien bitch." That would have been a more believable response.

Queen Latifah will now be the main bitch along with Valerie Bertinelli. Jenny Craig claims Kirstie has lost 75lbs with the program. Yeah, but she's still a fat bitch on the inside. She needs a snow ball. No! Not the sex act. The delicious ghetto pastry that's covered in coconut. It might make her a happier person.

The company went on to say, "She's proud to have been able to participate in the creation of Jenny's award-winning, integrated advertising campaign, and says she's thankful for the opportunity to help so many other people lose weight and keep it off."

I love press releases like that one. They never tell us the real reason. They just fill it with cotton candy fluff. It was either money or they couldn't take working with that loon. I'm guessing it was a little of both.

Image: Fame Pictures



  • Dumbasses