Is He Fucking For Real?

Paris Hilton's Birthday isn't until next week, but dumb bird bitch threw her ass a pre-Birthday party last night. Paris had Oompa Loompas perform, so I'm hoping she made her publicist, Elliot Mintz, dress as King Oompa Loompa or something. You can't tell me that's not some sort of costume. That looks like diarrhea was smeared all over his face. He was probably fixing Paris' stocking down below when she accidentally queefed and sprayed him with her toxic juices. He should get a raise for that.

Ali Sims also attended the party. She's looking for her next bitch to hang on to since Brit is out of commission.