No, You're Retarded

People Magazine asked Parasite Hilton about the rumor going around that she wants to adopt four blonde babies. The ever poignant Paris said, "That's retarded. No, I'm not." Well put.

Paris also spoke about rumors that she's dating Adrian Grenier. She denied she was dating him, but said it was nice talking to someone on a deeper level. "We met a couple years ago [and] we've stayed friends. He's been like kind of a mentor to me, teaching me about the environment and what I can do. I think it's cool to talk to someone in L.A. who has more to talk about than all this artificial crap people talk about. It's nice to talk to someone who's real."

And by "teach her about the environment" she means he pisses and shits on her face. Hey, that's Paris Hilton's way of getting in touch with nature. Don't judge! We all must find ways of doing our part.

Just so you know she's also really taking this acting thing seriously this time! Paris is currently shooting a musical movie called Repo!

"I really tried hard to get this role. I rehearsed. I was the best at the audition. I got this part because I deserved it, and I'm going to make sure I do the best job ever."

Well, this time she swallowed during her "audition" which means it was a really good audition and she really wanted it this time!

Image: Splash