White Oprah Is Hysterical, Blohan Is A Moron

Maria Menounos is currently on "The View" where she said Billy Bush called White Oprah and she was apparently "hysterical" and was unable to speak. Meaning she was drunk. Just Joking! TMZ spoke to Michael Lohan who blamed himself.

He said, "I want to withdraw everything -- court wise -- sit down with Dina as Lindsay's parents and figure out how to help her. Lindsay can't do this on her own ... when we were together, none of this was happening."

LASTLY! Us Weekly has the story on the "car chase."

Passengers in a black Cadillac Escalade said they were being chased by a white Denali SUV, driven by Lohan. Police met up with the SUVs in the parking lot of Santa Monica's Civic Center.
The passengers in the other vehicle apparently knew Lohan, police said, but did not realize she was the person chasing them. Police said Lohan had two passengers in her vehicle, and there were three people in the other vehicle.

Lohan, 21, was taken into custody at 2:15 AM after failing a field sobriety test. A breath test was conducted and her blood alcohol was between .12 percent and .13 percent, Talbot said. California's legal limit is 0.08 percent.

She was was booked on two misdemeanor charges of suspicion of driving under the influence of alcohol and driving on a suspended license and two felony charges of possession of cocaine and

Lindsay drove into the police station parking lot?! HOW FUCKING DUMB IS SHE?! Cocaine kills brain cells!!!!