The Grinch is working overtime this year and is trying to ruin Christmas already even though it’s still only November. Instead of crawling on his belly like a snake and stealing gifts, this year he’s trying to hit us where it really hurts: by working us over with a decidedly UN-festive gut punch. The Grinch gave Mariah Carey the vocal clap!
In America, we have a few utterly pointless annual traditions that people like to make a fuss over but that nobody actually cares about. We have the Super Bowl, we have Christmas and we have the annual Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show. Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news but Christmas and the Super Bowl are still on as far as I know. However, there is a ray of light… the VS Fashion show is in danger of being a clusterfuck this year!
Satan may be calling home one of his favorite little buddies. Multiple outlets including TMZ are reporting that coo-coo crazy cult leader Charles Manson is ailing in a bad way. It’s really unfortunate timing for the swastika foreheaded grand pappy to lose his grip on life just as his predicted Helter Skelter race war seems like it might actually be happening. I never thought I’d say this but Charlie might just have earned himself his first and only “I told you so!”.
Here’s a really scary idea that is also terrible. Deadline reports that Paramount Players is going to remake the already terrifying Nancy Meyers movie What Women Want starring Mel Gibson, only this time it’s gender reversed and stars Taraji P. Henson and is called What Men Want!
Kim Kardashian has a lot of balls in the air right now. She’s got a smell coming out (KKW Crystal Gardenia), she’s got a shopping app in the works and on top of all that she’s got a human child growing in a surrogate that’s about to be born! Kim says they used a surrogate for their third, because she had medical issues with her first two, and she told Entertainment Tonight that deciding to use a surrogate for her latest product launch has turned out to be harder than she thought it would be.
The new trailer for the upcoming season of Ryan Murphy’s true crime anthology, American Crime Story 2: The Assassination of Gianni Versace, is finally here. I have a feeling Donatella Versace‘s long skeletor finger has raked itself across Ryan’s face and warned him to “keep it classy, dahling”. I know she’s not supposed to be the star but Donatella is clearly the funnest character up in this bitch. And if you’re competing with Gina Gershon and Maya Rudolph in The Battle of The Network Donatellas, bleaching Penelope Cruz’s eyebrows, slapping a blond wig on her head and saying “presto chango!” does not a Donatella make. It makes a weird looking Penelope Cruz with a bizarro accent. She’s still basically Penelope Cruz but with itchy looking contacts and hasn’t she been through enough already?