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Birthday Sluts

June 22, 2017 / Posted by:

Meryl Streep (68)
Anwar Hadid (18)
Dinah Jane Hansen of Fifth Harmony (20)
Overly Attached Girlfriend (26)
Portia Doubleday (29)
Bob The Drag Queen (31)
Douglas Smith (32)
Porsha Williams (36)
Jai Rodriguez (38)
Donald Faison (43)
Lecy Goranson (43)
Carson Daly (44)
Mary Lynn Rajskub (46)
Laila Rouass (46)
Kevin Aviance (49)
Emmanuelle Seigner (51)
Uwe Boll (52)
Amy Brenneman (53)
Dan Brown (53)
Randy Couture (54)
Erin Brockovich (57)
Tracy Pollan (57)
Bruce Campbell (59)
Cyndi Lauper (64)
Lindsay Wagner (68)
Klaus Maria Brandauer (74)
Michael Lerner (76)
Kris Kristofferson (81)
Prunella Scales (85)

Pic: Cloudpix

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Night Crumbs

June 21, 2017 / Posted by:

Celine Dion was back in Paris looking like the most successful and richest Mary Kay saleslady in history. That is a look that screams “$100,000 worth of Magic Masques sold and I got the pink Cadillac to prove it, dahling!” – Lainey Gossip

After watching this preview clip from the second season of Real Housewives of Dallas, I’m wondering how in the hell did Bravo cancel Real Housewives of Miami, but yet renew this boring mess? – Reality Tea

Johnny Depp’s ex business managers are now saying that they also heard stories about him abusing Amber HeardCelebitchy

Halsey got done up like a third-tier Pink impersonator for Paper MagazineDrunken Stepfather

THE QUEEN vowed to protect LGBTQ people and also shaded Trump by not mentioning his (possibly canceled) visit to her land – Towleroad

I don’t know why this keeps happening, but someone cast Blake NotSoLively in another movie – Pajiba

Hello, welcome to the Vampire Bordello Bar & Grill, my name is Olivia and I’ll be your server tonight.” – Popoholic

Ariel Winter’s ass cheeks are smiling at you again – The Nip Slip 

Bella Thorne did a social media bikini photo shoot on Scott Disick’s lawn. Will somebody please replace that burger with a gallon jug of water since she’s obviously suffering from thirst and not hunger – Hollywood Tuna 

But where is the scene in the new Dance Moms trailer where Abby Lee Miller and the moms get arrested for child abuse? – SOW

After already coming out as trans, Charice has announced that his new name is Jake ZyrusOMG Blog

The Directioners probably don’t know whether to cheer their arms off or call the authorities and let them know that Tess Ward is obviously mentally insane since she dumped Harry StylesPopsugar

For one second, I got the tingles thinking these were pictures of a shirtless current day Luke PerryJust Jared

Pic: Wenn.com

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19-Year-Old Tom Cruise Was All About The Bible And Blowjobs 

June 21, 2017 / Posted by:

Somewhere Ted Haggard is reading that headline and falling in love with 19-year-old Tom Cruise.

Curtis Armstrong is best known to me as Bert Viola from Moonlighting, but he was also Booger in Revenge of the Nerds was in Risky Business with a then 19-year-old Tommy Cruise. Curtis wrote his memoir, Revenge of the Nerd, and an actor can’t put out a memoir unless they fill it with juicy shit about other actors. So Curtis wrote about working with Tommy and said that he was a strict square who never wanted to go to the bar with them. Before Tommy was the Jesus of Scientology, he was reading about the real Jesus. Curtis writes that Tommy was a born again and like any good born again, he balanced his bible study with getting his dick sucked by randoms.

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Open Post: Hosted By The Cast Of “American Crime Story’s” Versace Season 

June 21, 2017 / Posted by:

If you’ve been following the making of Ryan Murphy’s latest bewigged dramatic extravaganza, The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story, then you’ve probably already seen Darren Criss (Andrew Cunan), Edgar Ramirez (Gianni Versace), Penelope Cruz (Donatella Versace) and Ricky Martin (Gianni’s partner Antonio D’Amico) in character. But Entertainment Weekly got the first official picture of all of them together. That cover is a tacky, opulent 90s fever dream of Day-Glo messiness, and yes I’m going to force my family to recreate it for our 2017 Christmas card, and we don’t even do family Christmas cards! And yes, hair will be pulled and faces will be scratched as we fight over who gets to be the “Donatella.”

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Peen Break Time Courtesy Of Milan Christopher From “Love & Hip Hop” 

June 21, 2017 / Posted by:

I’m pressing pause on my regularly scheduled program of making bad dick jokes and slobbering at the mouth about dick like dick is the only thing that matters (it is) to bring you pictures of an actual dick!

Milan Christopher is an out and proud hip-hop artiste, model and Love & Hip Hop: Hollywood cast member, and he decided to celebrate Gay Pride Month by bringing out the Wienerschnitzel franchise on his crotch for Paper Magazine. Milan tells Paper that he decided to let his south-pointing lubed-up salchicha hang out for the sake of activism. Milan feels like it’s time for society to be okay with the sight of a greased-up naked man. Sure, Milan bared his perfectly pruned dick shrub (which is giving me Kid from Kid ‘N Play meets Bart Simpson) and oily peen for attention, but he is still my hero. Anybody who uses his big dick as a sledgehammer to break down barriers and pave the way for more dicks in photo shoots is a real vanguard to me. Milan is putting the PEEN in pioneer. NSFWness ahead.

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