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Open Post: Hosted By This Holy Mural Of George Michael In Australia

January 15, 2017 / Posted by:

The Music (via Queerty) reported on this lovely new mural of the late, great George Michael. It’s by Australian artist Scott Marsh and depicts George with a saintly halo, wearing white and rainbow-hued clerical garb, and bearing weed and poppers. I’m pretty sure this beautiful and holy vision has been experienced by many a Provincetown or Fire Island summer partier after partaking too freely of… what have you.

It’s George Michael as “patron saint of the gays!” (An equally dead Bea Arthur would like a word, Scott.) Scott explained his work, which he had permission to paint from the building’s owners who were friends with George.

They were telling me stories about him and their times with him in Sydney and he sounded like a pretty incredible person, so I just sat down with them and threw some ideas around. The idea we stuck with was him as the patron saint of the gays. They love it.”

Important detail: Since patron saints tend to cradle some sort of magical talisman, Marsh thought it wise to paint a joint and big bottle of amyl into Michael’s paws.

“[His friends] were like, ‘I don’t think we ever saw him without a joint in his hand,” he says, “‘and put amyl in his other hand,’ and I just thought, that’s too funny.”

This seems like the sort of thing George would have loved.

Pic: Instagram

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SNL Took On Donald Trump’s Alleged “Golden Showers”

January 15, 2017 / Posted by:

Alec Baldwin as Donald Trump started last night’s Saturday Night Live cold open by noting “Yes, this is real life. This is really happening.

Truer words and all that! It was revealed this week that US intelligence agencies were given info that our incoming president allegedly might have been compromised- sorry, “kompromated-ed,” by the Russians. With what, you ask?

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Ringling Bros. Circus Is Closing After 146 Years

January 15, 2017 / Posted by:

Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus, the biggest circus in the world and self-styled “Greatest Show On Earth” is packing up the big top after 146 years. 146 years! That’s A LOT of assuredly depressed animals. NBC reports that the circus is calling it quits due to low ticket sales they’re blaming it on not using elephants any longer. Oh, sure, blame it on Dumbo!

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Uma Thurman’s Ex-Boyfriend Accused Her Of Mixing Alcohol And Pills In Court

January 15, 2017 / Posted by:

Agonizing custody battles” has become an unfortunate trend with our celebrity friends lately. Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have reportedly been scrapping over their hundreds of children (how do they even keep track of them, there’s so many). Yesterday, we watched a dismal video of law enforcement at Paula Patton’s house on behalf of Robin Thicke (he was trying to leave with their son, but no dice). Today’s the day we learn that Uma Thurman and her ex-boyfriend, French financier Arpad (Arki) Busson, have been yanking on either arm of their 4-year-old daughter Luna like she is a child-sized wishbone.

Arki publicly accused Uma of mixing booze and pills to battle mental illness during their custody trial on Friday. One, how Valley of the Dolls. Two, who doesn’t?

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Open Post: Hosted By Tom Hardy’s Kind Of Penis-Resembling Autograph

January 14, 2017 / Posted by:

Tom Hardy is so dreamy with his DSLs and his sweatshirt and beanie and the smile and the actually being nice to dickkick-level annoying paparazzi. Sigh.

What? Oh, yeah. Uh, so this dude at TMZ observed to Tom Hardy that his signature looks like a dick. Watch the video and then judge for yourself:

Thoughts? Maybe? I’m kind of seeing sperm. And no, I’m not just typing that because I want to make a Junior reboot with Tom in which he makes me pregnant. I’m not even going to delete that. What’s done is done. Why do all my Tom Hardy posts end up underneath the gutter, in the place where the alligators writhe around and the scary clowns live? You can’t blame me. Have you seen that pic from his new show? #loincloth

Pic: TMZ

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TV Land’s “Heathers” Reboot Is A Go

January 14, 2017 / Posted by:

Shannen Doherty had damn well better be the lynchpin of this project. If they’re going to take my adolescence out back and shoot it in the head with this Heathers reboot, they better salvage all they can from the original version. And I don’t mean Veronica Sawyer with her annoying tendency to journal and her disingenous friending of Martha Dumptruck! I’m talking a red scrunchie back on Heather Duke’s head!

Deadline Hollywood reports that TV Land has definitely picked up the new Heathers, with a 10-episode order for next fall.

Heathers, TV Land’s first hourlong series, was originally developed and ordered as a half-hour pilot. It came in long, 38 min, and when TV Land brass found it nearly impossible to cut, they decided to make the series hourlong instead.

The show is going to be an anthology, ala FX’s Fargo, spotlighting different characters in different episodes. The core group of Heathers, however, appears to still be an overweight girl, a lesbian, and a gender-queer kid. Honestly, it won’t be Heathers without a quartet of snotty white girls, but I’m all for progress.

And yes, tv royalty Shannen Doherty will be involved. But, her involvement so far is mysterious!

Original Heathers cast member Shannen Doherty will guest star as a pivotal, unnamed character in the series.

So, obviously she’s going to be someone’s mother. Or the DJ who hosts Hot Probs. Either or, is fine.

Pic: TV Land

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