Does Spirit have cheap flights to the UK next month? The Spice Girls bus, the one they drove around in the seminal Spice World movie, is an Airbnb now! You can sleep in it! You can pretend to be Posh, or Baby, or Scary, or Butch, or the infantile one! The Tower of London ain’t got shit on The Spice Girls bus!
The 20-year-old (!!!) gameshow Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? has been canceled, according to TV Line. “That show is still on?” you’re asking yourself. Me, too. What about the weak links show with that mean British lady? And Howie Mandel’s models with briefcases show? Are those still on? This is what you get when you cancel cable. You have no idea what terrible bullshit is still airing on regular TV. General Hospital’s still on, right? *panicked face*
The residents of Watkins Glen, NY had probably already un-boarded their windows, cancelled their
panicked exodus planned weekend away to Niagara Falls, and torn the “Parking $150” signs out of their driveways when TMZ reported that Woodstock 50 was back on yesterday. That sucks that some of them probably had to pay the rental fee for the Porta Potty to host on their front lawns twice.
In his new memoir, Kardashian koven kastoff Lamar Odom admits he used someone else’s piss from a prosthetic dick to pass a drug test so he could compete in the 2004 Olympics. This is so disappointing. Someone who would date a Kardashian did something shifty? Why, it’s like finding out Kerri Strug was doping.
So what? Neither can I! I had to look it up to write this post! Spider-twink Tom Holland is out stumping for his new Spider-Man flick Spider-Man: Far From Home. So, he went on Jimmy Kimme Live! with co-stars Jake GYLLENHAAL, Zendaya, and Jacob Batalon and there was this whole air hockey thing. Celebrities must hate how they have to act even more like circus poodles for these irritating late-night hosts now with all the humiliating games and what-not. They should blame simpering kumquat Jimmy Fallon. He started that bullshit. Moving on, Kimmel pointed out that Tom doesn’t know how to spell Jake’s name.
But we didn’t need the second and third ones! According to The Verge, John Wick: Chapter 3 director Chad Stahelski says that Lana and Lilly Wachowski are working on a fourth installment of The Matrix franchise. This is a good thing for the Wachowskis because they haven’t had a hit since The Matrix Revolutions in 2003. And bad news for all of us who think The Matrix is one of the most perfect sci-fi/action movies ever made…and that the two follow-ups were…nice?