Apparently high schools are tired of boring, predictable plays with salesman deaths and songs about a somewhere over the rainbow. That’s no fun! If you’re going to do drama bring the DRAMA! This is the lesson being taught by New Jersey’s North Bergen High School Drama Club because they decided to celebrate Halloween early this year by performing a staged version of the classic sci-fi horror film Alien.
I wonder if these are the kinds of antics we should prepare ourselves for as the impending union of Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez threatens us off in the distance. The couple, who will probably strap mirrors to each others’ faces when they read their vows, are already starting with the name dropping by claiming former presidential couple Barack and Michelle Obama have sent them well wishes for a long and happy marriage, which probably made JLo chuckle in her soul.
Every time I see Tionne “T-Boz” Watkins and Rozonda “Chilli” Thomas of TLC, it makes me sad because it reminds me that third member Lisa “Left Eye” Lopes is no longer with us. However, their story has been told many, many times before to the point where I don’t necessarily need to hear it again so I can bust out in tears around the part where Left Eye dies. In other words, please stop depressing us. Well, that’s not happening. However, this time they’re changing things up by bringing the drama to Broadway.
Cardi B’s lawyers are busy, because not only are they trying to get her the trademark to “Okurrr,” they’re also going after bloggers who claim part of her money moves include selling coked-up cooch.
If you ever wanted to play a game of Analyze The Crazy with members of Beyonce’s stanbase, the Beyhive, you should show them Rorschach tests and await the degree of answers ranging from Beyonce in a monsoon to Beyonce slapping Solange with her weave. Because they are absolutely the reason why therapy was invented in the first place. They do not play when it comes to their Queen and they will let any bitch have it who says something displeasing to their ears. Need proof? Go ask Tamera Mowry-Housely, who is probably one of the most non-threatening celebrities on the planet. She’s been catching hell from the Beyhive about some comments she made when she met Jay-Z back in the early-aughts and claimed she was charmed by him. Those sounded like words of appreciation to sane people, but what the Beyhive heard was “Jay-Z is my man now!!”
I LOVE (eye roll) Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez because they’re both shameless attention whores and using their soon-to-be marital union to make money and get more attention. While other folks would still be lying low after completely destroying classic music forever JLo is hopping back onto the money train and dragging A-Rod along for the ride so they can both cut a few checks for their upcoming wedding by releasing a line of his and hers sunglasses.