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The Internet Hates The Car Kendrick Lamar Bought For His Sister

June 5, 2017 / Posted by:

Sometimes the people of the internet can be that catty, judgmental frenemy with nothing nice to say EVER. Even when there is a positive story, they feel the need to crack their knuckles, sit on their toilets with their phone and talk shit (I imagine that’s where most of those fuckfaces do their dirty work). Just ask Kendrick Lamar’s sister, Kayla Duckworth.

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Halle Berry Says She’s Not Trying To Tell Us She’s Knocked Up

June 5, 2017 / Posted by:

Halle Berry is one of those sneaky types of attention whores. The kind that, when the paparazzi accosts her, she pretends to be annoyed and starts throwing shit and yelling at them like the crazy cat lady who lives on your grandmom’s block. But whenever she needs them for publicity, she tones the crazy all the way down. For example, at Saturday nights Chrysalis Butterfly Ball in Los Angeles, Halle arrived with her plus one either being a new baby friend forming in her belly, or the remains of a gigantic steak burrito from Taco Bell busting out of her gut.

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Kanye West Wants Kim To Fix Her Ass ASAP!

May 26, 2017 / Posted by:

Kim Kardashian West’s ass-tronomical booty is an entity all its own. Of course we all know it’s faker than a $9 bill. But still, her butt has become her calling card. Unfortunately after years of filling it with all kinds of chemicals, that shit is starting to look like a drunken third graders science project. So Kim is taking measures to make sure her poop chute remains among the elite of hot messes, and her husband Kanye West is 100% on board with Kim’s reconstruction plans.

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1980’s Singer Rockwell Arrested For Battery

May 26, 2017 / Posted by:

Nepotism is a time honored tradition in any business industry, and the entertainment world is no different. Take for instance, media mogul Berry Gordy (think of him as the Sean Combs from your grandparents’ generation). He had a shit load of kids (8, to be exact) who knew if they wanted to sing, they had the ultimate hook up.

Case in point, one of Berry’s sons, Rockwell, cooed into our ears during the 1980’s with his only hit song, Somebody’s Watching Me. Well, no truer words have ever been spoken, because now the only people watching him are the cops.

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Another Teen Mom Might Be Doing Porn

May 25, 2017 / Posted by:

A million years ago (in the 90’s, to be more specific), I knew a lot of teen moms growing up and none of them got paid to be on their own damn TV show. Honestly, the only checks they received came from WIC. That all changed in 2009 when MTV’s reality series Teen Mom introduced a bunch of girls with babies into our lives.

Fast forward to 2017 where one of the moms, Amber Portwood, may be following in fellow Teen Mom alum (and Dlisted patron saint of bad decision making) Farrah Abraham into the lovely world of having protein slurpees chucked into her face (AKA porn).

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Jamie Foxx Is Still Denying His Relationship With Katie Holmes

May 25, 2017 / Posted by:

I’ve never understood why people in Hollywood get so secretive about who they’re fucking. At some point, just by six degrees of separation, they’ve all fucked each other at least once. Case in point, everyone pretty much knows that Jamie Foxx has become Katie Holmes’ dick of choice for a while now, but they still like to keep shit on the hush hush tip, because we’re all idiots, apparently.

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