It’s time again for another chapter in the ongoing saga titled: How Serious Are Jennifer Garner And That Burger-Flipping Tech CEO. Today we’re talking about what title Jennifer Garner has bestowed upon John Miller, the guy she’s reportedly been seeing for about seven months. Seven months is definitely long enough to call someone the b-word. But according to People magazine, she’s not calling him that. A source says that Jen is keeping it casual:
“She doesn’t call him her boyfriend. But she loves getting attention from John. They have fun together and it’s easy. She only sees John when she isn’t busy with her kids. He understands that her kids are her number one priority.”
The source adds that John still hasn’t met her three kids, which might contribute to how casual Jen is keeping things. She also appears to be enjoying how quiet and un-public this relationship is.
“As far as dating goes, Jen very much enjoys it. For so long, she couldn’t see herself dating. Her friends are very excited that she is dating. She is very much trying to get things private though.”
The source also says that Jen is happy that both her’s and John’s divorces have finally been wrapped up. But who cares about that? What matters here is what she’s calling John when she gets white wine drunk with her book club. Is she going with the standard “my man“? The much more gag-triggering “lover“? Personally, I think she should play off his job as a burger chain CEO and call John her all-beef patty daddy.
For the past ten years, Gwyneth Paltrow has run a multi-million dollar business, and she’s clearly got a formula that works: find any existing product, get creative with the medical claims, then watch gullible rich ladies spend too much money on it. You’d think investors would be banging down her door to get in on the action. But according to Gywneth, she’s practically had to beg for Goop.com investments, and it’s all because she’s famous.
Reports estimate that the California wildfires are only about 35 to 40% contained, with some evacuees able to return home. The lucky ones get to come home to houses that still look like houses instead of still-smoking charred remains. TMZ says that the Woolsey wildfires forced Pink and her husband Carey Hart out of their Malibu home a few days ago, and they’ve since been able to return. And after returning, Carey has formed a neighborhood militia that will shoot anyone trying to loot his neighborhood.
Quite a few of the allegations against human-shaped nightmare Harvey Weinstein happened outside the statute of limitations. But some didn’t, like those from Paz de la Huerta. In November, Paz came forward with two allegations of rape, and was working with the NYPD. Now Paz has decided to take it one step further by filing a lawsuit against Harvey.
Back in August we learned that the latest TV show from the ’80s that was about to get the reboot treatment was ALF. It made sense, since ALF ran for four seasons from 1987 to 1990 and spawned a cartoon, a late-night talk show, and Milhouse Van Houten’s favorite Pogs. But according to TV Line, the proposed ALF reboot is dead.
ALF was proposed to be rebooted by Warner Bros. Television with original writers Tom Patchett and Paul Fusco. It stands to assume we’d find out what happened to ALF after he skipped town for the colony of New Melmac at the end of the 4th season. That’s still up for interpretation, as TV Line reports that the reboot “is not moving forward at this time” after it failed “to attract a suitor.”
That’s fancy TV insider talk for not being able to land a network or a production company.
I can’t imagine it’s done for good. Just done for right now, maybe. And that’s a smart choice, because I just don’t think ALF could really work in 2018. ALF’s whole thing was being a high-maintenance menace while hiding out in The Valley from the U.S. Military’s Alien Task Force. A narcissistic alien with boundary issues like ALF would blow his cover the second he discovered the iPhone and how much attention he could get on Instagram by posting selfies with the family cat.
Regardless of whether she is or isn’t a member of Taylor Swift’s girl squad, Lorde is probably going to get a call from Big T herself today. Because I’m sure the thought of helping Lorde prove that genius Kanye West isn’t as original and creative as he thinks he is has really put some pep in Taylor’s slither. Lorde has performed in a floating glass box, and so has Kanye and Kid Cudi. But according to Lorde, she did it first and Kanye and Kid are blatant copycats.