Natasha Richardson passed away at the young age of 45. Natasha never recovered after falling during a ski lesson in Montreal on Monday. Her family issued this statement today:
"Liam Neeson, his sons, and the entire family are shocked and devastated by the tragic death of their beloved Natasha. They are profoundly grateful for the support, love and prayers of everyone, and ask for privacy during this very difficult time."
I really don't know what to say, so I can only offer condolences to her family and friends. May Natasha Richardson rest in peace. She will be greatly missed.
This is Vadge and Fishy at a Valentino party at the Oak Room in NYC last night. The Oak Room was temporarily renamed Lucifer's Tomb when these two assholes were there.
What in macrobiotic hell do these two smug cunts talk about? A better question would be, how did that room survive their ridiculousness? The insane amounts of pretentiousness blowing through that room is enough to strip the finish off all that wood. The wine in that glass probably quickly tried to evaporate itself, so it wouldn't have to listen to these two British rejects blather on about their perfect bowel movements, taut vaginas, GOOP and Kabbalalahahhaha. Even the terra cotta on Valentino's skin is about to crack off all over Anne Hathaway.
And I really think that Vadge is eating fetuses, because her skin is looking so toddler-like. That some Dumplings shit right there.
Kenley Collins, the screechy tugboat captain's daughter from Project Runway 5, was arrested in Brooklyn yesterday morning after she went fucking insane on her fiance and woke him up by throwing a cat at him! Only this looneytard....
The New York Post says that Zac Penley woke up to a pussy in his face and it wasn't the one he was having a wet dream over (Heidi Klum). The pussy was just the grand opening. Kenley also threw her laptop, three apples (FRUIT ABUSE) and water at him. Zac crawled to a phone and called 911. After the attack, Kenley reportedly told him, "You're lucky, it could have been worse."
TMZ says Kenley was charged with a bunch of shit including "2nd degree assault, 3rd degree assault and criminal possession of a weapon in the 4th degree."
After she was released without bail, Kenley told The Post, "It was a miscommunication. Fights happen, And that's that. There is no case." Yeah, tell that to the poor pussy who was thrown across the room. I really hope that before that pussy quit that bitch, it pissed and went caca in all of Kenley's stupid hats.
You know, Kenley probably realized that if she married Zac she would become KENLEY PENLEY. That's what drove her over the edge.
Kenley Penley the pussy thrower is like the worst person ever.
Big ole' girl was trolling through London last night when he pulled the breaks on his boots after seeing a big penis in the window of a store. Luckily, Kevin's friend got him away from the store before bitch jumped through the window to sit on that book. Kevin had that look in his eye like his ass was ready to pounce. His donut hole was definitely making cream.
Jenna Jameson's twin boys slid down her Drop Out coochie on Monday in Newport Beach and we finally know their names. Well, InTouch claims they know anyway. According to sources, Jenna and Baby Huety named their boys Jesse and Journey Jett. Journey fucking Jett. I guess Old Milwaukee Trans Am and Natty Ice Pinto were already taken in her family.
I mean, was Journey Jett born with a mullet and wearing a cut-off monster truck t-shirt? Poor kid probably already has a police record thanks to his name. That's a name a judge was meant to say. Damn, Jenna! And I bet you Sunbeam Bread stock is going to go through the fucking roof!
But then again, Journey is the greatest band ever. "Don't Stop Believing" can be played in church or at a strip club. It's the theme song of our lives!
The restraining order Brit Brit's masters filed against Adnan Ghalib has just been extended until 2012. Daddy Spears and his bitches originally asked for the order when they found out that Brit Brit was talking to Adnan and Sam Lutfi on a pre-paid cell phone. Daddy Spears claimed Adnan was trying to fuck with the conservatorship, so that he could get more shit out of his little Cheeteroni.
At a hearing today, Adnan failed to show his landing strip in court, so a judge stamped a big "fuck yes" on the extension and called it a day.
I'm sure Brit Brit is making an oh-so-sad face since I think she was landingstripmatized by Adnan's ass. Hey, don't knock the pubie runaway. Adnan can eat and exfoliate the coochie at the same time. Brit Brit will get over it. Daddy Spears can give her a piece of velcro to rub her bits on when she's missing Adnan. And now Adnan can slide into the gutter again so we don't have to hear from his ass anymore!
Why can't the city of L.A. just let Kanye West be great?! Why did they have to go and charge him with three misdemeanors for busting up a paparazzi's camera at LAX last September? Why did they have to do that? Besides, if you ask Kanye, he'll probably tell you he was doing the pap a favor since the camera was an old model.
The L.A. City Attorney's office charged Amber Rose's sugar daddy with misdemeanor vandalism, battery and grand theft. Kanye's road manager, who was also involved in the bust up, was charged with the same shit but twice. Double the fun!
If convicted if all charges, Kanye could get two and a half years in the chokey.
The charges came from an incident at LAX on September 11th. Some pappies were taking pictures of the voice of this generation and he wasn't having it, so he had himself a little camera-breaking party.
Can I laugh now or will I get slapped with a CAPS-LOCK key? Seriously, this bitch isn't going to prison. There isn't a prison big enough in the entire universe to house Kanye and his ego. That's an ego that will bust through bars!
And I'll be right back, I need to go keep refreshing his blog. I'm waiting for the blog post that will finally break HIS MACKBOOK AIR!!!!11!!!11!!!!!!111111!1
What in massive nostril hell did Faye Dunaway to her face?! Somebody throw me a wire hanger, because she's scaring me (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather
One of the founders of Facebook likes the peen? He's "buy me the Mother's Cookie factory" kind of rich, right? Move over Mah Boo... - Towleroad
This can't be hygienic - Hollywood Tuna
Katherine Hagel got her ass pushed out by Beyonce - Lainey Gossip
Our Lady of Cheetos is getting death threats. It's totally the Nabisco bitches - Hollywood Rag
Is there a naked Clive Owen app for the iPhone? - Popsugar
Emmy Rossum tries the sexy and it's a little uncomfortable - Egotastic!
Virtual Beer - Cityrag
That has to hurt. Belinda Carlisle got served by The Woz!!! - Rickey
Ceiling Eyes is getting her own reality show - Just Jared
You may have a new book to help your bowels move along while you're trying to drop some shit in the toilet. Star Magazine says that John Mayer is yapping to friends that he ready to write a tell-all about his relationship with Jennifer Aniston for $10 million.
A source tells Star, "John just can't keep his mouth shut. and he's telling friends that he's thinking of going public with all their juicy secrets."
John apparently thinks that people give a moldy shit about Jenny's obsession with yoga, her weird TV habits, obsession with astrology and her epic tantrums. Yup, sounds like a hard piece of caca that will come in handy when you need to level a table. And what's so weird about her TV habits? I'm sure the only channel her TV stays on is TLC. All the BABY and WEDDING shows she'll ever need.
The source also said that John was shocked when she called him "Brad" during grossy times. I think the source heard this wrong. John was probably shocked the one time she didn't call him Brad while rubbing his douche stick.
And John is already publishing a tell-all.......on fucking Twitter! Seriously, it's all fucking there. You won't have to pay cent and you'll walk away with a squeaky clean vagina after reading it!
Nothing compares to the broke down hos of Atlanta, but hopefully this fuckery right here will come close. Bravo has rolled out the new skanks of The Real Housewives of New Jersey premiering on May 12th. They could have also titled this The Real Pre-Ops Of Trannytown, because four of these tricks look like they've got excellent dick tucking skills. The fake ginge on the right just looks like she's just going to whine like a toddler on speed through the whole season.
My Tivo is really ready to quit this bitch, but I will have to force this mess upon it. Based on these hags' bios alone, this is going to be a pile of Aquanet vomit. I bolded the bestest parts:
Jacqueline Laurita: A former cosmetologist, she is now a stay-at-home mom, but still loves to pamper herself. She has a teenage daughter from her previous marriage and a 6-year-old son with her husband Chris, who owns wholesale apparel businesses and is brother to Caroline and Dina.
Teresa Giudice: Born and raised in New Jersey, her husband Joe owns a successful construction company. Together they have three young daughters, who take up much of her time. A friend of Dina and Caroline, she also loves to shop, get spa treatments and spend time at her beach house on the Jersey Shore.
Danielle Staub: “You either love me or you hate me, there is no in between,” says the single mom of two daughters. She prides herself as one of the first female American Express Black card members in New Jersey. She is also active in her local parish and regularly attends mass. She and Jacqueline are friends.
Dina Manzo: Founder of the nonprofit Project Ladybug, which helps children with cancer, she’s also an interior designer, an event planner, mother and best friends with her sister Caroline. Her husband Tommy works with his brother (Caroline’s husband) at their family’s catering business.
Caroline Manzo: She’s a mother of three and owns a real estate firm and a line of children’s accessories. Described as a “feisty spitfire,” she’s Dina’s sister and is on the board of Project Ladybug. She’s married to Albert Manzo, brother of Dina’s husband Tommy. Dina and Caroline’s brother is Jacqueline’s husband Chris.
Survey says? TRASH!!!!! Bravo better have shot this shit in HD, because how else would they get all the big hair and fake nails in one shot?
And if you haven't seen the brilliance below, please watch it. You will definitely agree with me that every bitch in this video needs to make at least a 30-second cameo in The Really Trashy Housetrannies of Jersey.