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Gross. They already annoy the fuck out of me and they haven't even been together for a month. I'm surprised they've lasted this long. Can't they just keep their nastiness indoors and spare us all! Kate Hudson and Lance Armstrong arrived in Monaco together for the Formula 1 Grand Prix.

The two sluts bags left their hotel today and got on a boat. Unfortunately, the boat didn't sink. I know, such hate. I can't help it. This is what they do to me.

Kate really needs to spend a few hours in the mirror, examining her laugh. Bitch looks fug when she laughs. She looks like she's smelling a rancid fart that she created. We all should examine our laughs in the mirror. Shit, I have spent many a night working on my "laugh face," "eating face" and "yawn face."

Here's more pics of Kate and Lance skeezing it up in Monaco.

Blaaaake's favorite crackie, Amy Wino, has confirmed that she is working on the Bond theme for "Quantum of Solace." It was reported that bosses were in talks with Beyonce instead, but Wino insists she's the one. She said, "I've written the song. If they like it, they like it. If they don't, they don't." If they don't, Wino will cook 'em up, cut 'em and smoke 'em up!

Wino went on to say that she's sort of pissed at the Bond bosses. She told the Daily Star, “I’ve done loads of Bond songs, there are loads of good ones I’m really happy with. I don’t know what is wrong with them or what the problem is, to be honest. It’s there, ready and done, and it’s up to them if they want it or not.”

She's done loads alright! A source close to the Bond bosses claim it's a delicate stage, “Amy is still seen as damaged goods – she will have to prove she’s on the road to recovery before she’s signed up.”

Too bad the road to recovery is lined with crack houses. They need to just let her do the song! She's the only that can do. Well, besides Chloe Lattanzi, but she's busy. They also need to make sure Wino wears the outfit above in the video. Hot crackie mess!

Lindsay Lohan's rep has once again denied that her client is Lezzy Lohan. Lezzy sounds better than Lindsay. It just does. When asked about Lindsay's relationship with Sammy Ronson, her rep said, "They are close friends." Deeeeenied. What is her pr bitch supposed to say?

I mean, they totally look like they are giving each other moustaches. Actually, I'm sure Sammy is the only giving a moustache. Lindsay is probably clean shaven down there.

Here's some pics of Lindsay at the pool in Cannes yesterday. Sammy is not around. She was back in the room trying to get Lindsay's tan grease off of her chode. Sammy, use Dawn. It cuts the grease!

Jakey Poo is totally checking out some hot ass in the picture above. Reese is thinking, "Why won't Jakey Poo play with my panty hamster?" Sigh.

Here's Jakey and his main fag hag cuddling outside of a restaurant yesterday. Reese is looking like a little pregnant in the belly. This is obviously impossible. You can't get pregnant from "tickle and giggle" sessions. It's just Shirley Temple bloat.

WHICH serial celeb- dating model is a little harsh on the men she sleeps with? She gave a titanic male star a measly "4" for his prowess in the sack. (Page Six)

Gis Bundchen?!!!

This married Golden Globe winning television actor from a network drama is older. Doesn't stop him from having guys nights out with his guy friends. Sad to say though those poker games he says he's having. Oh, he's having them, but with a group of strippers at a condo he owns. The only money changing hands in the game is what he pays for them to act out his fantasies. (Crazy Days and Nights)

William Shatner?

This celebrity couple have several children. The problem is that one of the kids is not the biological son of the male in the relationship. Daddy thinks he's the daddy but he isn't. Mom slipped and told the real dad who now wants to see his child. This should get very messy, very soon. (Crazy Days and Nights)

The Duggars?!!! Ha.

Which divorcing hubby is now asking for his sparkly engagement ring back? Problem is, he didn't exactly pay for it himself. (Full Disclosure)

Gay Al? He likes sparkly things!

Birthday: December 13, 1941
Age: 66
Birth Name: John Hamilton Davidson Sr.

Original Date of HS of the Day: May 22, 2008
Claim to Fame: John does it all! He's an actor, singer and game show host! His ass is best known for hosting Hollywood Squares in the 80s and The $100,000 Pyramid in the 90s. He was also in "Edward Scissorhands."

Where is he now? Bitch has been doing the Civic Light Opera circuit. He's been in "Man of La Mancha" and "Kismet." Theater queen.

Why is he HS of the Week? Because he needs a major comeback! Here's a clip of John playing a female impersonator in an episode of "Streets of San Francisco." Pure talent!

Here's a video of Daddy Spears and Brit Brit having the time of their lives at Christian Audigier's Birthday party the other night. When Daddy Spears notices they are being videotaped, he quickly moves the booze away from Brit Brit. I like seeing DS take control. I know, lame. Well, it's the little things in life!

It's Sunday afternoon anyway! What did you expect me to serve you? A deep fried French toast sandwich?! Mmmm...... Yes, please.

Source: Hollywood Bubble

TMZ reports that Ass and Pete pocketed $1.4 million from People for exclusive pictures of their trash bag wedding. However, there was a catch. Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo had to be at the wedding. That's why they put a little picture of Jess and Romo on the cover, because they sell.

Papa Joe reportedly took all the pictures, so they could get even more money. Yeah, right. He only wanted to be the "official photographer" so that he could take pictures of Asshole getting ready. Barf.

Jess and Romo attended the wedding together even though it was reported they had broken up. So did cold hard cash bring Romo to the party? Doesn't that bitch have enough money on his own?

The bigger question here is, how much money did Hemingway the bulldog get? He's suffered the most in all of this. I mean his name is Hemingway and look what he was forced to wear!

Yesterday, I posted pictures of Marcia Cross wearing some hideous ass Suri Cruise wig. Thankfully, she didn't wear that shit while getting coffee with her hot pepaw husband yesterday. Nothing good can come out of wearing that wig. I'm sure Tommy Girl already asked her to come in for an "audition."

Marcia, don't ever cover the ginge again. EVER!

I'm still convinced Marcia goes home every night and does this:

These two should really be home rocking bat baby to sleep NOT out partying. They look like they were chewed up and spit out! They probably don't even have a good time at the club. They sit in the corner like two Debbie Downers, sipping on their Sex On The Beaches and nodding at each other every now and again. Bat Boy probably locks himself in the bathroom, turns off the lights, hangs upside down on the ceiling and tries catch a few zzzzzzs. Stay home!

And that lipstick on Xtina should be illegal. Shauna Sand and Barbie circa 1987 are the only two bitches that can pull off that shade.