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Matthew McConaughey might have another reason to keep his shirt off. He has been offered the role of Thomas Magnum in the Magnum P.I. movie. Entertainment Weekly reports that Mattey is reading the script from the dude who wrote Dodgeball and will make a decision. As long as it's in his contract that he doesn't have to bathe or wear a shirt, he'll do it.

Magnum P.I. ran from 1980 - 1988 and starred Tom Selleck as a Navy Seal turned detective in Hawaii.

I wasn't allowed to watch this show when I was little. My mother would obsessively watch it though. She would go in her room and lock the door. I don't even want to know what went on in there. It was a bitch washing off the snail tracks from the TV screen the next day.

Yes, Hollyweird is remaking another TV show. They are running of TV shows to remake. It's only a matter of time before they start dipping into the 90s. Acapulco H.E.A.T. is totally next.

Britney Spears stopped by Ed Hardy's corporate offices today to speak with Christian Audigier about possibly doing a clothing line together. Christian told Star Magazine, "I have known Britney for a long time — she is a good friend of mine. We're talking about working together, designing a line of clothing."

Taco Bell and Starbucks should get in on the action. They can provide authentic stains for all the clothes. It wouldn't be a Brit Brit garment without some sort of food stain on it. She shouldn't stop there either! She should team up with Suave for a line of hair products and Smiley's Yarns for a line of weaves.

Brit Brit was also there to pick out some things to send to her knocked up sissy, Jamie Lynn. Her Birthday is tomorrow. Brit totally sent her a bunch of free shit in size XS with the note, "Happy Birfday Bitch! Hope yoos will be able ta wears these afta yo pop out Casey Jamie! Yo won't tho, on account of yo bein' a fat ass!"

They must have brought in the day and night crew to photoshop this shit. Airbrushers were working through lunch. There was so much airbrushing going on that they had to breathe from an oxygen tank.

These are the promo pictures for the Sex and the City movie due out this May. These women didn't even look like this in their baby pictures! Sarah Jessica Parker's hand doesn't look like it's reaching out from the grave the way it normally does. That is not right!

And that doesn't even look like Kim Cattrall! She looks like Arlene from Garfield. I can't even look at Kristin Davis anymore without thinking of her hairy bush from the past.

This is the new Justin Timberlake featuring Madonna (well...it is) video and I lasted the entire 4 minutes! Woo hoo! I will award myself by not listening to this song ever again. I had to watch the video with the sound turned to zero, because it reminds me of the time my high school marching band tried to do 2Pac's "California Love." Ugly memories.

The sun itself must have lit this video, because Madonna is wrinkle-free everywhere. Madge also wants to make sure we know that her thrusting 50-year-old crotch is here to stay. Basically, Madonna is turning into Sally O'Malley minus the sex appeal.

I just felt like I sat through a really strange, but hot biology class. Thomas Beatie aka the pregnant man was on Oprah today to discuss...well...the fact that he's a pregnant transman! The audience was shocked when Oprah announced that Thomas was knocked up. I don't know why! I've seen manlier woman. I mean...have you seen Chastity Bono lately? Speaking of, Thomas' wife has that total power lesbo look down. You can tell she wears the pants in the family. That's why he's the one carrying the baby. She's too manly for that shit!

So basically, this is what I learned:

Thomas' clit is like a mini-dick (like Chyna Doll's)
Thomas got pregnant through a donor...DUH
Thomas had his breasts removed...DOUBLE DUH
Thomas' baby is healthy
Thomas doesn't have a peen
Thomas' power lesbo wife has two daughters from a previous dude
Thomas' dad is not into him being a dude or being knocked up
Thomas is kind of hot and I'd totally hit it. Not pregnant Thomas! Although, that might be kind of freaky sexy.

I can't wait for TyTy's broke version of this. She's going to go undercover as a pregnant man to see what it's really like. She's going to cry and say it was the hardest time in her life. She's probably holding a meeting about it now.

Oh and I also learned that Thomas used to be a really gorgeous ass chick.....

Here's a clip from the show of Thomas and his wife going in for their ultrasound. I swear I thought their doctor was Linda Tripp for a minute.

You can also see clips of the entire episode here.

Jenny McCarthy was on Larry King last night to talk about Autism. Things got a little prickly when Jenny said that her son, Evan, would not be autistic if it wasn't for medical vaccinations. When one doctor dude started to say vaccinations are a boon to a lot of families, she cut him off and said it "Bullshit." Jenny went on to say that doctors are giving too many shots, too soon. She continued to tear into him while Larry King just sat there eating his oatmeal and scratching his diaper rash.

Click here to see the clip

While watching the clip, I just sat here thinking, "Damn, the girl from Singled Out has changed." Seriously, Singled Out host to Autism activist! I wonder what Chris Hardwick is doing?

Hooray! Rejoice! Let's throw a parade. The bra is bright yellow, but who cares?! She wore yellow, because it went beautifully with her orange skin. That's not self-tanner either. It's Cheeto dust. I will have a coffeetini (gross, but for some reason that tastes good) to celebrate. She's wearing a bra and her nails are clean. Focus on the positive!

In other Brit news, TMZ reports her new lawyer has filed papers challenging the legal fees she has to pay KFed. Her lawyer claims he lied about his income and hid a bunch of personal expenses.

According to the legal papers, Federline grossed $544,074.73 from his production company, "Gooseneck Productions" in 2007, and his expenses totaled $841,128.67. Phillips says Federline's so-called business expenses included "extraordinarily high tips for food and beverage services [e.g., $1,100.76 tip on $2,782 bill; $200 tip on $371.29 bill; and $2,000 tip on $365 bill].

KFed shouldn't be allowed to have business expenses. That's for people that actually do business. Smoking weed, getting chicks pregnant and watching court shows is not business. The tips were totally given in $1 bills through a g-string.

Here's more pics of Brit Brit at dinner last night and shopping during the day.

Anne Hathaway's beard, Raffaelo Follieri, was arrested by NYC police today for bouncing a $250,000 check. TMZ reports he's still in the chokey for one misdemeanor count. He's currently being booked. A source said his bank account was not even close to covering the check.

Annie, pull a Salma Hayek and get a beard that actually has some money. It's not hard. I'm sure Ryan Gaycrest is in the market for a beard of his own. The $250,000 check probably for something super douchey like a Maserati or a boat. I bet Raffaelo wears tons of Drakkar Noir too. He totally washes his briefs in it.

Actually, the douche probably wrote the check to himself, so he could get a few hundred dollars out of the ATM! We've all done it. We have! Sometimes pay day is too far away and those boots are calling your name today.

We all know how hard it was for JLo to have her Dragon Tales twins. I mean, she was forced to give birth in a regular hospital! I don't know how she survived. Skeletor knows this to0, so he went out and bought her $2.6 million diamond earrings as a "thank you."

He had their babies' initials engraved on each earring. One earring has the letter "M" and the other has the letter "E." That's pretty fucking funny that it spells ME! That's JLo's one and only true love. She gave him a pressie too! She gave him a coupon worth a dozen of her used tampons. Well, he needs the protein! He's been without it since she was knocked up!

In other JLo news, she's looking for a live-in nanny! I'm guessing she ran out of cousins who will accept being paid $5 a day for their services.