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Sandra Bullock and her hubby, Jesse James, were hit head-on by a drunk driver in Gloucester, Mass. last night. The drunk driver was the woman above, Lucille Gatchell. Luuuuuucccccy!

Nobody was injured, but 64-year-old Lucille was arrested. She blew a .20 on the breathalyzer - two and a half times the legal limit.

Sandy and Jesse were in a rented SUV. They were not driving. The Gloucester Police Lt. said, "They were fine – he was hugging her. Jess and Sandra were hugging. They said they were fine, they didn’t need medical attention. There were quite a few people snapping pictures of them."

Lucille's face in her mug shot says it all. Her eyes are telling me, "I can't believe I hit the star of Love Potion No. 9."

Seriously, that movie fucking rules.

Source

Madonna is leading the revolution of women over 45 spreading their crotches in photo shoots. Julianne Moore joined the revolution by letting out her crotch for the cover of May's Vogue Paris.

Julianne Moore could spread her ass cheeks and I would still be all over it. This woman can do no wrong. Although, I see a little copper wire popping out of her panties. Joooking.

She has a look on her face that is telling me she needs to push a queef out. Release it! The panties can take it. Even if they can't take it, a little strawberry panty pudding never hurt anyone.

And I thought Anderson Cooper was the kinky bitch at CNN. Yesterday, I posted about CNN's Richard Quest getting busted in NYC's Central Park for being in there past park curfew. The genius also told the cop he had meth in his pocket. Brilliant move.

Well, police found some other shit on his ass. Well, the stuff they found was probably IN his ass at one point. Anyway, they found a rope around his neck that was tied to his genitals. They also found a sex toy in his boot. I'm guessing it was a dildo or possibly some anal beads. Richie strikes me as the anal bead type for some reason. This was in addition to the meth in his jacket pocket.

The New York Post reports he was charged with with loitering and criminal possession of a controlled substance. The judge told him that if he finishes a 6-months of drug counseling, his case will be dismissed.

Richie was with an unidentified companion who was given a summons for not carrying identification.

Richie's lawyer issued a hilarious statement on why his client was in the park, "Mr. Quest didn't realize that the park had a curfew. He was simply returning to his hotel with friends." Full of shit!

And let me guess, the rope around his genitals was something his doctor prescribed for his severe erectile dysfunction. The sex toy in his boot was actually his hotel room key. Those zany hotels and their weird keys! The unidentified companion was the tooth fairy coming back from his night run.

Anderson Cooper is LOVING this mess.

Thanks Toni Ann

Al Gore may have just found his most powerful warrior in the fight against global warming. Phoebe Price talked to Hollywood Bubble about the things we can do to save the environment. It's all things we've heard before, but who cares?! PP is just the crusader we need to save the world. She's going to do it one chicken cutlet at a time!

She should totally be Vanity Fair's cover girl for their "Green Issue" next year. She must!

Here's the video of PP's plea to save the environment and some pics of her looking like Pocahotmess at a movie premiere and lunch.

Neil Patrick Harris recently denied that he ever said he didn't want Britney Spears back on "How I Met Your Mother." I don't believe his ass. He's pissed that Brit Brit, because she wouldn't watch his "Oops! I Did It Again" routine. Well, maybe she'll watch it this time, because People reports that she's coming back to the show for a second round.

A source said, “She had so much fun the first time around she really wanted to come back. It was a mutual decision to work together more.” On an episode that aired March 24th, Brit played a receptionist who falls in love for Josh Radnor's character. Fox Studios would not confirm that Brit's coming back.

In more important Britney news, who is that hot dude she's with in the picture above?! The girl needs to have him around more often. He's a little on the short side, but he can borrow Tommy Girl's Lady Footlocker platform sneakers (see below).

Here's pics of Brit Brit leaving Bally gym the other day with her mom. Lynne looks so....happy. That's weird, because the woman is never happy. She must have been celebrating 420 early. She has that "green glow" about her.

Suri Cruise celebrated her second year alive with an alien themed Birthday party yesterday. It wasn't really "alien themed," but there were tons of Scientologists there, so it's the same thing. I see that Tommy Girl wore his special platform white sneakers for this occasion. You know he got those at Lady Footlocker.

Tommy also brought Connor and Isabel out of hiding to attend the Birthday party. Nicole Kidman couldn't make it, because she doesn't give a shit.

How much do you want to make a bet that Tommy is going to try and pass off Suri's little doll as his next child. They are made from the same parts. Could be believable.

Dreamboat's life is in danger! Alert the A-Team, V.I.P and Cleopatra 2525! Dreamy needs their help.

The Sun reports that a plot to cripple his ass was thwarted by prison officials. He was told that chokey drug dealers want to hurt him, because he owes them money for heroin. Dreamboat has been getting the shit on credit and IOUs. Dealers are pissed, because he hasn't paid them a penny yet. And the bitch never will.

A source said that when Dreamy learned of the plot, he turned "white with fear." That's better than his usual shade of green.

Officials have moved him to a secure part of the prison. The source also said, “There are some very heavy people who have lost money and want to hurt him bad. They won’t kill him – but it will be a pan of boiling water job with sugar in it, to scar him good and proper.”

A pan of boiling water job with sugar in it? Sounds delicious! Like candy!

Adrien Brody is slowly melting my tar heart by continuing to have a fraudulent relationship with that Elsa chick. I have nothing against the broad, but she better step off if she doesn't want her face on a milk carton. That gorgeous Afghan Hound belongs to me and not her. The tattoo on my nalgas proves it. Not really, but if Adrien wanted me to ink my foreskin with his initials, I'd do it. Ugh, they are totally going to have beautiful Afghan Hound puppies together. Bringin' on the heartbreak...

Here's Adrien with homewrecker at a party for Conde Nasty Traveler in NYC on Thursday night. I've also added some Milo Ventimiglia, because I know you whores get sticky for him. Oh and this post would not be complete without Lady Miss Kier.

Katie Price and Peter Andre should not have been allowed into this country without Harvey in tow. That should be illegal. It's not right.

Anyway, these two terra cotta pots landed at LAX last night with Junior and Princess Tiaamii. I don't know if it was Katie and Peter's intention, but every time I read that poor child's name, I can only think of some Disney princess singing about birds and shit. That girl has to grow up to be a Disney princess or I just don't know.

While the whole family is in America, Harvey better be raising hell in the Andre mansion. He must take revenge for being left in England. Harvey is the one that should be trying to conquer America, not their orange asses!

Halle Berry popped out baby Nahla Areola (it's Ariela, but I like Areola better) a little more than a month ago and she's already getting back to work. Somebody's got to pay the bills around there. Halle will produce and star in the psychological drama "Frankie & Alice" reports Variety.

Halle obviously wants that second Oscar, because the movie is about a chick with multiple personality disorder. The lady is torn between who she is and a racist white alter-personality that preys upon her mind. High drama.

Hopefully, Halle will get all this dramatic shit out of her system, so she can finally do the most anticipated movie of her career. I'm talking about a sequel to B.A.P.S! That shit is one of my favorite cinematic masterpieces of all time. It has everything you could ever want in a movie. It has dance sequences, major wigs, latex suits and Martin Landau! I mean, what else do you need? Clip below: