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Oprah has left Stedman out of her will! Damn, he better start secretly stashing away her crap, so he can sell it on eBay later if he needs some dough. The National Enquirer (via MSNBC) reports that Oprah's partner of 21-years is nowhere on the will. She reportedly gives most of her $2 billion fortune to charities and her children. Yeah, her children. A source said Oprah wants to adopt 3 girls and raise them alone.

The source said, “It’s something she has always wanted to do. There’s no talk of her adopting the children with Stedman — this is something she’s going to do by herself.”

Alone my ass. What about Ope's beloved Gayle King? I can see those two getting old together, running some school. That shit will be like The Children's Hour.

I believe it, because there's no way Oprah's going to go down like that. She will give half of it to the Oprah Is God Forever And Always Foundation and the other half to Gayle and her 200 dogs. Gayle deserves it. She's been sucking Oprah's ass long enough.

Thanks M.E.

Zac Efron spilled his kissing techniques to J14 Magazine. Zac doesn't do it for me, but when I was reading this shit I got a little turned on.

Zac said, "Be respectful of the other person and don't just get on in there and grope all over the place. My favorite kisses happen when I've taken it nice and slow."

Uh...huh....what else Zac? Hold on...let me take off my pants. Ok, go ahead. "When girls rotate their tongues around your mouth like a washing machine, that's not a good idea. I've never experienced a washing-machine kiss, but I've heard about them." Girls? Uh...huh.. well...washing-machine kisses aren't meant for the lips. Well, not the lips on your face anyway. Keep going Zac.....don't stop. I'm almost there.

"Go easy and take your time. Don't try to swallow the person you're kissing by opening your mouth so wide!" Did you say swallow? Homerun! You're so dirty Zac Efron.

VIA Page Six

This is just a bad....bad....idea. David Fincher had a little chat with MTV where he mentioned doing a Fight Club musical. It doesn't look like he was joking. He wants to debut it on Broadway in 2009. That's the 10th Anniversary of the movie. Chuck Palahniuk, the author of Fight Club, is reportedly on board. Trent Reznor is considering writing the music.

Listen, I'm all about shirtless dudes singing and dancing, but this has "major embarrassment" written all over it. Think of the insurance costs alone. These Broadway actors will not like being hit over and over again and even with "fake stage fighting" it's bound to happen. They are too precious and pretty for that. They are queens! Hearing Tyler Durden screech a high pitch "owwww" after accidentally being hit is not my idea of a good time.

Bail on this Fincher. Bail on it now! Spiderman the Musical with music by Bono is bad enough.

Harvey's smiling! He's usually so grouchy. He probably bit Jordan's hand after this picture was taken. Well, she was probably hassling him, so she deserved it. Jordan brought the entire family to Australia to visit with Peter Andre's family. Of course reality TV cameras followed them. She probably also wanted to show off her new nose and tits too.

Here she is today with Harvey and her daughter Princess Tiamamaiamamamwaami or whatever the hell that poor child's name is.

Fame Pictures

Here's a clip from this Tuesday's "One Tree Hill" where KFed plays some rock dude. This shit makes the "rock" segments from Kids Incorporated look like death metal. I feel for the two actress that have to pretend that his shit is good. They probably had to film them separate, because those girls couldn't keep a straight face. There's a reason they are unsigned. They suck!

Rock out KFed! That head bob makes you so hardcore.

Click here if you can't see the video

"Little People, Big World" star and overall hot bitch, Matt Roloff, was acquitted for drunken driving in Oregon today. Matt was arrested last June after failing a field sobriety test. He has been in court for the past 3 days fighting the charges.

The jury deliberated for 4 hours, but the judge found out some of them were looking shit up on the internet. Midget porn! No, they were researching terms or something like that. They were told not to do that. Instead of declaring a mistral Matt's lawyer asked if it could be a court trial instead. The judge told the jurors they were dumb bitches and that they did a disservice to the entire legal system by not following court orders.

The state's only evidence was the failing results of the HGN. Matt claims he was driving messed up, because it was his wife's car and he wasn't used to the pedal extensions. The judge declared Matt not guilty of two minor infractions of not staying in his own lane and failing to take a breathalyzer.

Free at last!!! That is the best mug shot of all-time.

Source

Are times a tough at the Bonham Carter/Burton household or something? Helena Bonham Carter's dress looks like it was made using leftover Christmas wrapping paper. Poor thing. Johnny Depp is sex in a Salvation Army suit, but I just don't know about that hair. It only bring one person to mind...KEN PAVES! Johnny do yourself a favor and cut the Paves out of your life.

Here's these two wrecks at the Sweeney Todd premiere in London today.