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Tuesday, July 17th 2007

BUNNY?!???!!!!!??!!!

 
WTF?! It was reported a few months ago that Jordan was planning on naming her daughter "Crystal" after the title character in her second novel. Well, ONTD has a scan of the latest OK! Magazine where Jordan and Peter reveal their daughter's name as BUNNY! FUCKING BUNNY ANDRE!!!!! BUNNY! YES! B-U-N-N-Y! BUNNY! 
 
Go to ONTD to see for yourself. I am not making this up and I wish I was. BUNNY!  
 
Poor thing has only a few choices in career now: porn star, stripper, cocktail waitress or hairdresser!
 
BUNNY! I don't know what to say. You know Harvey can't wait to tell Bunny to hop her ass right out of there!
 
Bunny's pic courtesy of Cute Overload
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, July 17th 2007

We're Doing This Again?

Paris Hilton will get a second album. The first one was met with lukewarm sales and really didn't produce any hit singles. So why the hell are they giving that skank a second chance? Paris told E! that she's working with Scott Storch on a second album.

She said, "I'm already working on my new record. I've been in meetings with Scott [Storch] and we've been working on it."

Sources close to her say that she's been taking vocal lessons and she's really serious about her music career. Paris......sweetie....taking two dicks in your mouth at once is an art form in itself, but I really wouldn't call that "vocal lessons."

I mean do I really have to remind people that she can't sing! Listen below to hear her completely obliterate Rod Stewart's "Do Ya Think I'm Sexy?" The answer is NO!


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Oh and that's Paris and her new piece, Tyler Atkins, this past weekend. So in love. Tard love.

Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, July 17th 2007

Pay Up Skanks

 
A tribunal ordered Sting and his troll wife, Trude Styler, to cough up $51,000 to their former chef after she won a sexual-harassment claim last May.
 
Jane Martin, said that she was fired after she got knocked up. She claimed Trudie became angry when she got pregnant and made her work long hours and caused a fuss when she took days off due to illness.
 
The panel ruled that Jane was unlawfully dismissed and ordered Sting and wifey to pay up. They still haven't coughed up the cash and said they would appeal.
 
What the hell is $51,000 to them?! Just pay the woman and be done with them. Trude is a straight up witch! No wonder they have tantric sex. She couldn't produce semen from a battleship. Yeah that was lame, basically she can't get her man off! 
 
Thanks Christal
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, July 17th 2007

Possible Future Fug Baby Alert?

 
Accordng to Popcrunch Asshlee Simpson and Pete Wentz are engaged and possibly knocked up! Yeah, chew on that one. Tastes like a deviated septum, eh? They claim Petey popped the question at Live Earth. How green of him.
 
The source said, “Ashlee wasn’t expecting it at all, it was a total surprise. Pete whipped out a big engagement ring, dropped down on one knee, and asked Ashlee to be his bride. Ashlee says it was romantic, sexy — and that she said yes right away.”
 
This source said they want to keep it a secret. They also said that her behavior at a recent family wedding has sparked rumors that she has a bun in the ovent.
 
The source said, “Ashlee may have helped start the rumours herself. She was at a family wedding and was wandering around rubbing her belly. And she refused to drink anything. She probably didn’t drink that night because her dad was around."
 
I'm going to say not true. Papa Joe would never ever let this happen.  I doubt these two even have sex. They are probably just into heavy petting 
 
VIA ONTD
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, July 17th 2007

PANIC! Will Becks Play On Saturday?

 
David Beckham may not make his highly-anticipated debut as part of the L.A. Galaxy on Saturday due to a little ankle problem. The Galaxy are set to play against Chelsea at The Home Depot Center. As of yesterday, Becks' ankle was still sore and swollen.
 
1,000 fans showed up yesterday to watch Becks train with his team. Becks told reporters that he hopes he'll be alright.
 
The coach said, "There's always a possibility that he will not be playing because of his injury, but hopefully he will be.

"We're not going to force him to play. That would be wrong. If he's ready to play, he will, but we'll wait and see. We won't put him in any danger of making it long-term."

 
FORCE HIM! You paid enough. He probably hurt his ankle from kicking a table after he heard Posh say "mayjah" (see below) for the 1,000,000th time. I can't say I blame him.
 
Becks needs a nurse, so I'm going to head over to L.A. STAT to help him heal. He can put the sore in me and I don't mean the ankle! I'm not into foosting (getting fucked with a foot).
 
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, July 17th 2007

Not A "Mayjah" Hit

 
Victoria Beckham: Farting Coming to America was supposed to be a 6-part series and instead was filed down to a 1-hour special on NBC. A re-run of "Wife Swap" beat the show last night and it tied with re-runs of "Old Christine" and "How I Met Your Mother" so I wouldn't really call Posh' reality show a hit. The critics also beat it bloody.
 
Posh is completely pleasant, not annoying and that is the problem. The producers tried to make the show a little more exciting by putting in scripted and lame scenarios like Posh getting pulled over, Posh asking for her DMV photo to be re-touched and Posh having some weird lunch with the socialites of Beverly Hills (the hottest one is pictured above).
 
There just isn't enough there to make an interesting TV show. She wasn't dumb enough, bitchy enough or funny enough to keep my attention. Every now and again you can tell they gave her a few funny things to say, but it failed flat.
 
I like my Posh better silent and dressed to the nines.
I will say that if I hear the word "mayjah" (British for Major) one more time I'm going to make a "mayjah" fist and pound Posh in her "mayjah" head and send her to a "mayjah" hospital. That's "mayjah."
 
When this shit comes out on DVD we should hold a big party and take shots of whatever booze is laying around everytime her ass says "mayjah." We will "mayjah-ly" end up in St. Vincent's by the end of the night.
 
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, July 17th 2007

Afternoon Crumbs

 
Best served with raisins and a drizzle of honey - Hollywood Tuna 
 
Nike for feminists - Cityrag 
 
Kiki's saggy ass tits are hitting her knees - Egotastic! 
 
Cameron Diaz isn't ugly as usual - IDLYITW 
 
Kelly Osbourne sucks on two popsicles - Drunken Stepfather
 
Posh disses Eddie Murphy - Hollywood Rag 
 
Sheryl Crow brings baby out - Just Jared 
 
Eva and Tony are back and still as boring as ever - Popsugar 
 
Homo Efron wanted his co-star from the beginning - ASL
 
Kylie Minogue takes back the dude that cheated on her ass - HM! 
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, July 17th 2007

3 Nipples Are Better Than 2


Lily Allen happily whips out her third nipple for all to see on a British TV show. It looks more like a dick bruise than a third nipple, but I'll believe her.

VIA Gawker

Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, July 17th 2007

Caterpillar Brows

 
For being 61, Liza Minnelli doesn't have a bad bod. I mean she has a better body than Britney, but who doesn't? She should've chucked the see-through pajama pants altogether and just went for it. BLECH! Ok, I don't know if America is ready for that.
 
While the bottom looks good, the top part is a mess! The women of the World need to stop drawing their eyebrows with Sharpees!
 
Here's Liza with Nikki Blonsky at the Hairspray premeire in NYC last night. 
 
 
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Liza with Nikki Blonsky

Liza with Nikki Blonsky