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Britney Spears wore her most elegant outfit out to shop at Target with her friend on January 29th. Brit purchased some good for her kids. She obviously didn't purchase a bra, shampoo or laundry soap. My eyes don't have one safe place to sit. From her greasy mop to her dirty shirt to her wonky ass nipples. Let's discuss these nipples. SPF and JJ must already have teefs, because those things look like they've been through hell! I don't even want to....

Just why? WHY?! Britney please get a clue and then get your nipples fixed and change your damn shirt! That thing has jizz all over it you know it.

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Here are some more gems from ParisExposed.com. The birthdates on Paris Hilton's passport and drivers license don't match. Her drivers license name is also mispelled, so that could be a fake. Her pictures still look like they were taken from the back pages of The Village Voice, the escort section. I've also included a lovely video of Paris and Nicky Hilton trying to dance.

Money can't buy you moves.

UPDATE - That DL is a fakety fake. Click here to see the letter she wrote the fake DL makers. Why does she keep this crap?!

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Thanks Jill

Yesterday, a rumor that Courtney Love was in talks to replace Paula Abdul on American Idol swept the internet. UsWeekly reported that Courtney received a call from Executive Producer Nigel Lythgoe to possibly guest judge on American Idol and possibly replace Paula. Courtney confirmed the call, but wouldn't say anything else.

Nigel said today, "I did not call Courtney Love and am afraid someone may have misrepresented me. Courtney Love is a very talented artist, but the judges for American Idol are Paula, Randy and Simon. We have no plans to add to or replace any of them."

So who called Courtney? A source close to her said her ass was pranked! Ahahaha!!! You know it was Paula Abdul! Didn't Court wonder why Nigel suddenly sounded like a drunken piece of trash?!

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Over the past few days I have received at least 15 emails with the above video. It's some bride on her wedding day that completely freaks out after getting her hair done. She throws a huge tantrum and takes the scissors to her hair to "fix the problem." When I first saw it, I was pretty skeptical. I've seen more believable meltdowns on "Fashion House." According to Dlisted reader vZa the video is a complete phoney. The bride is aspiring Canadian actress Jodi Behan. You can find her on Facebook. She WAS a student at Loretto Abbey Catholic Secondary School.

Sorry to burst your Bridezilla bubble!

Last December, Lane Garrison was involved in a car accident that killed a 17-year-old boy. It was discovered that he had been drinking that night. Lane met the 17-year-old boy and two 15-year-old girls at a gas station where the kids recognized him from his role on Prison Break. They invited him to a party and he went. Later that night, when going to get more booze his Land Rover hit a tree.

TMZ is reporting that the Beverly Hills police department will hold a press conference at 4pm today. Reportedly, they have sent the cast to the Los Angeles County District attorney and are recommending criminal prosecution. His blood alcohol level was said to be "high" and the DA will decide whether or not to press manslaughter charges against him.

He better get busy on doing his asshole exercises, because that thing is going to be put to good use in the clink!

I haven't seen KFed out and about for a while. He's currently in Miami for what else....Super Bowl. Here he is today with DJ Irie at the Delano. I'm guessing he's staying at the Motel 6 since he probably can't afford the Delano.

UsWeekly has obtained a receipt of things Britney Spears bought at the grocery store. Damn! Can't a fatty buy buttermilk in private? Here's the list and there's aren't any surprises:

Hot dogs......$4.19
Doritos......$1.88
Lean Cuisine One Dish Favorite frozen meal (5)....$10.00
Diet Coke and 7-Up, 12-packs....$7.79
Florida’s Natural orange juice (2)....$6.00
Bib...............$3.99
Pampers Easy-ups, size 6.......$10.79
Pampers Swaddlers, size 1..........$10.49

Britney was also spotted wearing the Star of David sparking rumors that she's Jewish now! The necklace actually belongs to Isaac Cohen. She can't be Jewish if she's eating hot dogs!

Image Source: People

Jengelina! - Popbytes

Keifer Sutherland burned his own doll - Hollywood Rag

Christina Aguilera's Candyman video - Just Jared

Did Paris Hilton have an abortion as Amber Taylar? - IDLYITW

Who's Fergie Ferg's new man? - Hollywood Tuna

Nicolas Cage's hair twin - Cityrag

Gwen Stefani's just a girl - Mollygood

Sienna Miller drops the F bomb - Defamer

Fall '07 is all about meggings - BryanBoy

Paris Hilton on damage control with her fans - Popsugar

Sienna Miller in a slutty jailbird dress - Egotastic!

ScarJo really broke that Josh Hartnett's heart - ASL

Thanks to T-Pot from B97 in New Orleans for shouting out to Dlisted this afternoon!

Denise Richards and Richie Sambora are currently in Maui after Denise has just finished wrapping "2 Dumb Bitches" aka "Blonde and Blonder" with Pamela Anderson. Denise has an almost perfect body, but I still don't know why she's hittin' that. How does Richie continue to get hot chicks? He must have a dick of gold and a tongue like the energizer bunny.

Visit FlynetOnline to see more pics of these two....

Here's the video to go with the Pete Doherty story I posted earlier. He needs to go on A&E's Intervention. Don't worry the video isn't that graphic.

Click here if you can't see the vide above