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The moment we've been waiting for (not really) has arrived and Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are officially husband and wife. Katie wore an off the shoulder Armani gown and Tom wore a blue suit. Boring and yawn.

People Magazine reports:

The sunset ceremony was performed by a Scientology minister, according to a statement from their reps. The wedding party included Cruise's children, Isabella and Connor, the best man was Cruise's best friend, David Miscavige – the head of the Church of Scientology – and Katie's sister Nancy Blaylock served as the matron of honor. Though initially there were questions about whether Cruise and Holmes's marriage on Saturday was official – the Mayor of Bracciano, Italy, said the couple needed to have a civil ceremony in town in order to make it legal – Cruise's reps say Tom and Katie took care of everything beforehand. "As is customary for couples marrying outside of the United States, Cruise and Holmes officialized their marriage in Los Angeles prior to their departure for Italy," according to the statement.

Posh Beckham used this moment as her own fashion catwalk. Bitch looks way hot and I'm sure she was going for that alien look. David couldn't attend the wedding, because he was due back for training. I think he got in trouble. Anyway, I'm sure there will be a hell more pictures and I can't wait (sarcastic yawn.)

Kimbo and Jack Osbourne at Light Nightclub in Vegas 11/17

I'm JOKING! About, the unfortunately part anyway. Ok, not really. Ok, I am. Anyway, Kimbo Stewart has said that her father is a damn liar. Rod earlier said that Kimbo had liver disease from being a drunk ho. She wants to set the record straight and said, "I love my dad but sometimes he has a big mouth and not just when he's singing. I don't have a liver disease. I was exhausted and feeling sick from burning the candle at both ends, and my doctor told me to cut back on drinking and smoking, which I have, and I feel so much better."

Burning the candle at both ends? She means that in a sexual way, right? Homegirl does NOT work, so I know she's not talking about. She doesn't have liver disease, but she has FUG face disease and there's no cure for that.

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Looks like Britney Spears is back to looking like hell. She dropped her new short hair and instead went back to her old ways with a tired weave. Brit was with her bodyguard yesterday and some white dude. He's probably the one who put that broke, kitchen-ass weave on her. Oh Britney, you make it so hard.

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KFed performed with Biz Markie last night at Mansion in Miami Beach. He carried around a bottle of champagne like he's balling. You know that's some Andre, dumbass can't afford anything more than that. He apparently didn't talk to many ladies and kept to his friends. Um...cause he can't afford to buy their ass a drink! Poor KFed. Damn, he's such a tool.

Katie Holmes will be Mrs. Tom Crazy in less than 30 minutes. The ceremony will be held at 5pm Italy time. It is currently raining and Katie arrived with her family at the castle earlier in the afternoon. Andrea Bocelli has arrived and he's due to sing "Ave Maria" at the ceremony. The guest list includes John Travolta, Kelly Preston, Posh & Becks, Brooke Shields, Jim Carrey, Jenny McCarthy, Will Smith, Jada Pinkett Smith, J.J. Abrams and more. The sleepy town of Bracciano has hung signs in windows and restaurants have dedicated menus to Tom in honor of this day.

Oh well, Katie has really done it now! Poor bitch. I almost feel sorry for her.

Yawnsville and boring! Happy TomKat Wedding Day!

Eva Green

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