Kraft Is Calling Salad Dressing “Salad Frosting” To Get Kids To Eat It

Kraft has come up with an idea to get kids to eat more of their ranch dressing: LYING! Just lie to their sweet, innocent, dumb little faces but only because it’s about something really important like their ranch dressing. Kraft has put their ranch dressing in a container that looks like a frosting container and called it “Salad Frosting” in hopes to get kids to eat more salad covered in ranch. My first thought was, “How much healthier is ranch dressing compared to actual frosting?” The answer is not much. Ranch dressing is basically the chocolate sauce of salad dressing.

According to HuffPo:

It’s worth noting that ranch dressing isn’t necessarily that much healthier than actual frosting. Pillsbury Creamy Supreme vanilla frosting has 140 calories and 5 grams of fat per 2-tablespoon serving, while Kraft’s Classis Ranch Dressing has 110 calories and 11 grams of fat for the same serving size. The Pillsbury frosting has more sugar, however, with 20 grams versus 1 gram for the Kraft dressing.

Maybe instead of lying to our kids to make them marginally healthier, let’s just say fuck it and be who we are and put actual frosting on our salads. I mean with the invention of Cotton Candy Cereal, Sour Patch Kid Cereal, and Lucky Charm Flavored Beer we don’t have that much further to fall. Even our president rewards top college athletes with fast food.

Kraft is claiming that kids will eat anything with frosting, so this will create dinner time bliss and promote healthy eating. I bet all he people working hard on childhood obesity are thinking, “Why didn’t we just call ranch dressing ‘frosting’?” Problem Solved!

According to a recent study, Ranch dressing is the most popular dressing in the United States, and kids will eat anything with frosting, right?” the press release notes. “It’s a match made for dinnertime bliss. Now, convincing children to eat salad, broccoli and carrots may be a whole lot easier. Just add Kraft Salad ‘Frosting.”

Turns out Kraft wasn’t the first one to think of calling ranch dressing “salad frosting“:

Interestingly, the idea of “salad frosting” doesn’t seem to originate with Kraft ― or with parents, for that matter. Prolific Twitter dad James Breakwell’s 6-year-old was way ahead of the brand. In February, he tweeted, “My 6-year-old called ranch dressing ‘salad frosting’ and now I’ll never call it anything else.

My 6-year-old called ranch dressing "salad frosting" and now I'll never call it anything else.

— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 3, 2019

I’ve seen a few examples of children calling food by different names and it’s pretty adorable. My friend Amanda’s daughter called parmesan cheese “spaghetti sugar” and my daughter called her blood “boo-boo juice” which just means anything liquid (including blood) is juice in her eyes. I’m probably giving her too much juice but don’t worry I’ll let her cover her salad in ranch forsting so we can continue on our fit family journey.

Pic: The Kraft Heinz Company