Kris Jenner Claims That Her Spawn Make At Least Six Figures Each To Plug Shit On Social Media

April 13, 2019 / Posted by:

Unrealized Disney villainess Kris Jenner tells CBS News in an upcoming interview that her plastic-molded clan of overinflated innertube terrors “definitely” make “six figures” when it comes to pushing products like laxative tea to their millions of followers. People get paid less for internal organs in order to save lives. This can’t be life.

In an interview that’s going to run on CBS Sunday Morning tomorrow, Kris gets into the amount of money her Koven members make for doing this:

 

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#ad You guys all know I looove @flattummyco shakes. I’ve just restarted them (it’s Day 2 today) and I’m already feeling so good. We had a huuuuge Christmas this year and between that, New Years and everything inbetween… I felt like it was impossible to fit in my regular work outs and eat healthy. But this program is giving me a kick in the right direction that I need. These meal replacement shakes are so good and they’re helping me get my tummy back to flat. I’m already feeling amazing and I’m so excited for the next few weeks. Because they’re all about getting women back on track… they’ve got a 20% off sale going on right now, so if you want to start 2019 off right… trust me, you’re going to want to check them out. PS. I’m doing the chocolate program🍫

A post shared by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

And this:

 

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Blue for my hair + pink for my body! @sugarbearhair has the most delicious vitamins #ad #sugarbearhair

A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on

Kris dribbled this out:

And every time they post something touting a product, they’re putting money in their pockets, Jenner said. “My daughters are constantly getting offers to post something for a company, or a brand, on social media,” she told Smith. “They have a fee for a post, or a fee for a story, a fee for Facebook … they have a fee schedule.”

Well, how much exactly, we reluctantly want to know?

Jenner, who has guided her daughters’ careers, said there’s a sliding scale that’s all over the board when it comes to pricing, depending on the post’s subject, or who – Kim, Kylie – is doing the posting. “I mean, it’s definitely six figures,” Jenner said.

I hope Jamie Lee Curtis got the same sort of scratch for pushing Activia. Because that’s a product that makes you dash to the toilet, too, and Jamie Lee’s at least likable. Jenner also noted that the Kardashian/K-Jenner Koven have no problem with jacking up their prices depending on the product.

She added that if the pitch is for “a pharmaceutical product, if it’s something that you’re going to drink, or ingest, or put on your body” the price goes up.

In addition to revealing that she doesn’t stay in touch with  Caitlyn Jenner (“The kids do. Yeah, the kids are good.”), the genius who patented legal child trafficking also got into how she trademarked the term “momager.” Because she’s malevolent and there weren’t any words almost as evil as the n-word in our public lexicon, I’m guessing?

As for trademarking “Momager,” Jenner said she thought it would be a good opportunity. “I do that from time to time because I feel like something’s important,” Jenner said. “And I want to protect it.”

You know those times when you’re totally nauseous yet can’t throw up and don’t want to possibly injure yourself by cramming your fingers down your throat? May I suggest setting your DVR to record Kris’ interview and never erase it so you can use it for those moments? Problem solved!

Pic: CBS

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