Hot Slut Of The Day!

Jason Hardesty, the puppy poser of UPS!

The war between delivery people and dogs is a long one, and there’s been many, many bloody battles. And since lots of us constantly order shit online because we don’t want to leave our houses (example: me ordering water and lube from Amazon because I know it’ll get to me before I make the decision to finally leave the house), it has caused a rise in dog attacks against delivery people. But one UPS delivery dude from New Orleans is bridging that divide with a bridge made out of awww-inducing PUPPEH PICS!

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Birthday Sluts

Night Crumbs

For decades the shores of Brittany in France have looked like the graveyard of broken 80s tween bedroom dreams, because busted Garfield phones have been washing up onto land, sometimes 200 a year. Just when HBO was about to make True Detective season 4 about the mystery of Le Garfield Phone Beach, it has been solved! A farmer revealed that a major storm in the 80s most likely knocked a container off of a ship and the container ended up in a nearby cave where its cargo, the Garfield phones, have been slowly leaking out. Treasure historians can now update their files, because the greatest and biggest treasure ever found is the mountain of Garfield phones in Brittany! – Vice

Jake Gyllenhaal is looking at the pap’s camera like he doesn’t know if he wants to whoop a trick’s ass or fuck a trick’s ass. Or both! – Lainey Gossip 

Um, okay, but if you truly want to see some Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark just watch CNN – Pajiba

If you’re in the year 1983 and suffering from cold ankles and overheated crotch, wear the mess that Brooke Burke is wearing here – Drunken Stepfather

Be right back, Googling “Ivan Lendl’s huge dick” – Towleroad

Miley Cyrus as Hannah Montana or Miley Cyrus as Tish Cyrus? – SOW

What in Tootsie getting attacked by a mutant Muppet HELL is Goopy Paltrow wearing? – Celebitchy

Agnes Varda has died and she should be honored for many things including the legendary move she pulled when she sent a cardboard cutout of herself to the Oscar nominees luncheon last year – Just Jared

Pic: Facebook

Open Post: Hosted By Lil Pump Continuing To Make Good Choices By Investing In A $250,000 Grill

Today in Lil rapper news, Denmark’s worst nightmare, Lil Pump, has turned his attention from terrorizing quiet living citizens of Europe with his unruly antics to terrorizing his dentist. Showing off what he calls his “million dollar smile”, Lil Pump posted a video on Instagram of his most recent sound investment, a dazzling set of 18-carat diamond and rose gold teef. According to Hot New Hip Hop, he paid $250,000 for the grill, leaving one to wonder where the other $750,000 went. I guess you really just can’t put a price on a young man’s smile.

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Nicolas Cage Claimed Fraud As The Reason Why He Wants His Fourth Marriage Annulled

As you know, Nicolas Cage got married over the weekend in a messy Las Vegas strip wedding and quickly decided he was not into it and filed for an annulment four days later. Just when you thought it couldn’t get any weirder, Nicolas Cage comes swooping in deciding he wants to pull a 2004 Britney Spears.

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It Took An Anger Management Class To Teach Alec Baldwin That He Doesn’t Have An Anger Problem

Alec Baldwin does not have an anger problem, he has a problem with people accusing him of having an anger problem and if you don’t leave him the fuck alone about it you can say goodbye to your three favorite teeth. Alec recently appeared on Howard Stern, the combination nearly causing a cataclysmic climate event by pumping toxic levels of hot air into the atmosphere, and claimed that he’s not really an angry guy. He realized this while attending his court ordered anger management classes for that parking spot fracas from last November. Turns out, compared to the other rageaholics in his class, Alec thinks he’s a real pussycat.

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