Hot Slut Of The Day!
The Iceberg Queen of Iceland!
Elsa, who? Jadis, wha? Nicole Kidman, huh? The new ice queen we should all bow down to is Judith Streng, an American grandma who majestically ruled her icy kingdom while floating on an iceberg throne made by Snow Miser just for her!
Judith Streng lives far, far away from Iceland in Texas, but she and her son decided to go on vacation there. Why do I have a feeling that one night, while playing Solitaire on her phone (the current day memaw’s version of the Reader’s Digest crossword puzzle) with Deadly Women (the current day memaw’s version of Unsolved Mysteries) on in the background and a cup of psyllium husk tea (the current day memaw’s version of Metamucil) at her side, Judith felt a chill when ethereal frosty voices whispered in her ears, “Come back to Iceland, our queen, we need your guidance, come back to Iceland…” So Judith booked a trip to Iceland! And she tells Good Morning America that while visiting Jökulsárlón Lagoon, she noticed an iceberg shaped like a throne and it called to her. It was as though Judith’s loyal subjects (the penguins, seals, and narwals) created that throne just for her: THEIR QUEEN! So Iceberg Queen Judith took her rightful place on the throne:
“It was shaped like an easy place to sit. You can tell by looking at the shape of it, and I thought well it looks like fun.”
After Iceberg Queen Judith regally posed for her royal portrait, a wave crashed onto her iceberg throne, causing it to rock and break away into the ocean. Queen Judith was carried off to her destiny: to rule her icy kingdom! But sadly for the sea creatures of Iceland, their Queen was taken from them when a boat captain from Florida happened to be in the area and rescued Judith. Florida, ruining shit again!
Judith’s son sent the pictures of her ruling her icy kingdom to his daughter who posted it on Twitter where it went viral. And that’s how we all learned the tale of Iceberg Queen Judith’s way-too-short reign.
Grandma swept out to sea on an iceberg while posing for a picture. @JanaiNorman has the viral moment. https://t.co/W1vUNMab63 pic.twitter.com/HqN5wg7aUp
— Good Morning America (@GMA) March 1, 2019
Now THIS is what really happened to Rose from Titanic.
But seriously, Iceberg Queen Judith getting rescued is bittersweet, because yes, she gets to return to her family, but now her loyal subjects are without her. But it could be worse, better to be without a queen than with a queen who warbles out that annoying ass Let It Go song every five minutes.
Pic: Twitter