Archives: March 2019

Birthday Sluts

March 26, 2019 / Posted by:
Diana Ross (75)
Nina Agdal (27)
Carly Chaikin (29)
Jonathan Groff (34)
Keira Knightley (34)
Sara Jean Underwood (35)
Amy Smart (43)
Natasha Leggero (45)
T. R. Knight (46)
Larry Page (46)
Leslie Mann (47)
James Iha (51)
Kenny Chesney (51)
Michael Imperioli (53)

Pic: Wenn.com

Eric Allen Kramer (57)
Jennifer Grey (59)
Leeza Gibbons (62)
Martin Short (69)
Vicki Lawrence (70)
Steven Tyler (71)
James Caan (79)
Nancy Pelosi (79)
Alan Arkin (85)
Sandra Day O’Connor (88)
Leonard Nimoy (1931-2015)
Tennessee Williams (1911-1983)
Robert Frost (1874-1963)
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Night Crumbs

March 25, 2019 / Posted by:

Us brought in $70 million over the weekend, and $12 of that came from me, and another $12 came from the woman in front of me who threw up her hands and cheered every time someone got killed. First of all, I’m glad that the bunnies from The Favourite got more work. Second of all, I hope Lupita Nyong’o isn’t forgotten during awards season because she deserves several trophies for her (SPOILER ALERT) impeccable voice impersonation of Elizabeth Holmes with dry mouth – A.V. Club

Jon Hamm took the Hammaconda (not pictured) out for a night on the town – Lainey Gossip

Alanis Morrissette and Souleye made another baby, so prepare for a baby name that sounds like a cross between an indica strain and a Hunger Games character – SOW

The tears of gays is still the secret ingredient in Chick-fil-A’s chicken batter  – Pajiba

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Ben Affleck Runs On Dunkin’ Donuts And Thinks He’s Behind Its West Coast Expansion

March 25, 2019 / Posted by:

OK, at least laying claim to stale jelly-filled doughnuts and iced coffee isn’t as bad as, y’know, being a white woman who thinks she birthed the ancient practice of yoga. Ben Affleck is a Boston boy, and apparently some Masshole traits have moved with him to Hollywood, like rooting for the Red Sox, foul taste in body art, and starting the day with a giant vat of Dunkin’ Donuts coffee.

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Wendy Williams Stepped Out Without Her Wedding Ring

March 25, 2019 / Posted by:

It was just a few short weeks ago that Wendy Williams channeled the ghost of Charlton Heston and told us somebody’d have to pry her wedding ring from her cold dead hands. Well, I guess Hell done froze over because even though she said we’d never see her without her wedding ring onin this lifetime”, Wendy was spotted leaving her sober house about 20 lbs of diamonds lighter. Maybe she had to hock it on Diamonds4Diapers.com to pay for her husband Kevin Hunter‘s rumored new baby.

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Pauly D Allegedly Got “Ab Etching”

March 25, 2019 / Posted by:

You know how the Jersey Shore douches are all about that GTL (gym, tan, laundry) life? Well, that was years ago and now sources are saying that Pauly D is currently more about that PTL (plastic surgery, tan, laundry) life, because they say his hard cum gutters are from something called ab etching.

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Open Post: Hosted By The Selfie That Pissed Off Gwyneth Paltrow’s Daughter

March 25, 2019 / Posted by:

I feel like being Gwyneth Paltrow’s kid has to be a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, you’re living one fancy life, you get Blythe Danner as a grandma, and you’re bound to get first dibs on whatever $1,200 plain-ass T-shirt GOOP is hawking that month. On the other hand, you’re probably inundated with people asking shit like “How many vaj steamers does your mom have?” and “Does your mom REALLY think she invented yoga?Apple Martin is Gwyn’s kid with consciously uncoupled ex-husband Chris Martin, and Apple looks A LOT like Gwyneth and she is also VERY MUCH going through her teenage years. Of course, Gwyn thought it’d be cute to share a selfie on Instagram of the two of them on a ski trip that likely cost more than a normal person’s lifetime earnings. Apple was NOT here for that.

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