Three weeks after we laughed off the silly rumor that Kate Beckinsale and Pete Davidson were new boo things because they – GASP – left a Golden Globes party at the SAME TIME, it appears that despite no engagement ring in sight (yet), Kate and Pete are definitely a thing. Just give me a sec to process this highly important late BREAKING news!
Kate and Pete were photographed holding hands as they left his stand-up show together early this morning. Holding hands leaving a bar is the clothes wearing equivalent of doing it, so they were definitely 100% heading home to hump. In fact, they are probably still lounging around together in bed at this very moment checking their names in Google Alerts. via People
The Saturday Night Live star, 25, stepped out with rumored flame Kate Beckinsale, 45. The duo held hands as they left famed music and comedy venue Largo at the Coronet in West Hollywood, California.
Davidson’s latest set featured some material from his Jan. 12 show at the Tarrytown Music Hall in New York — including a joke about ex-fiancée Ariana Grande‘s infamous comment about the size of his penis, which he called a “mean” but “also genius” move.
Pete’s supposed Big Dick Energy must be lending it’s, er, “hand” to help Kate oversee his beyond scrubby skater boy fashion. Actually, Pete’s high school look is probably adding fuel to Kate’s crotch fire, because she definitely has a type these days: young, dumb and full of cum. As for Pete’s taste, Kate is a minuscule brunette babe with a chisled jaw a la Ariana Grande, give or take two decades and two feet or so of fake hair. With this highly scientific data, it’s clear that this couple is a match made in Heaven!
And because I am a reputable news journalist, here’s a timeline of their relationship, or whatever you want to call it:
January 6: Kate and Pete are seen
eating cannoli canoodling at a Golden Globes afterparty.
January 12: Pete “smiled sheepishly” and said “Yes” when an audience member yelled out “Kate Beckinsale” during his stand-up
paddle board show.
February 2: Present day hand holding while leaving bar scenario.
Where I was first hasty to blame the random couple generator for this hook up based on age difference and class status alone (posh Brit movie star versus TV comedian), in hind site, Pete and Kate are all kinds of of course, I can’t wait to see what the next three weeks hold for PECK. Because can’t we all agree that PECK is the best name for them, and that three more weeks is about all we can depend on? And even that’s pretty generous.