Chris Pratt And Katherine Schwarzenegger Probably Won’t Take Anna Faris Up On Her Offer To Officiate Their Wedding

January 16, 2019 / Posted by:

Chris Pratt and Anna Faris had one of the politest and most efficient divorces in recent memory (even if it seemed to have lasted an eternity), so it’s not surprising that they maintain a warm and supportive relationship. Both have moved on, Anna’s got her cinematographer boyfriend, and Chris just got engaged to Jesus by way of Katherine Schwarzenegger. Anna recently addressed the engagement on her podcast Unqualified and said that Chris texted her the news the very next morning. She was so happy for them, she hinted she would be willing to officiate the wedding herself! But it’s unlikely they’d accept. According to People, they will probably want Jesus to handle it.

On her pod, Anna said that she knew that her “sweet Chris” (sweet, Jesus) would announce his intentions to ensure Katherine remains an honest woman for the rest of her days very soon. And she was right:

“I knew that it was gonna happen, and I love her and I love him. I’m just so happy that they found each other.”

She continued, “Chris texted me this morning and he was like, you know, I proposed to Katherine last night. And I was like ahhh, that’s amazing. And I texted him back like, just want to remind you I’m an ordained minister!”

I’m guessing Anna’s an ordained minister like I’m an ordained minister. Sometime in the mid-90s I patiently waited for my modem to connect and for a website to load so I could register online to become a minister in the Universal Life Church. Somehow I don’t think that qualification will be sufficient for a Hillsong wedding. According to Town & Country, Katherine’s mom Maria Shriver is friends with the Hillsong’s OTHER creepy hipster pastor Chad Veach.

People says that multiple sources have stated the obvious.

“They’re going to want a religious wedding,” says a source. “I know that Chris does, and I assume that she does, too. God is going to be a part of this marriage.”

So sorry, Anna. Your heathen services will not be needed.

Pic: Instagram

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