Former “American Idol” Host Brian Dunkleman Drives For Uber And Dares You To Say Something
It’s 2019 and the economy is terrible. Most people rely on more than one stream of income and sometimes that means selling your items online, or selling weed to your neighbors, or selling ass, or getting a part-time gig like driving for Uber. Last year, former Cosby Show actor Geoffrey Owens was called out by a moron for having a job at Trader Joe’s, but the support he got far outweighed the shame. Which brings us to a true throwback in the form of Brian Dunkleman, who you may remember as Ryan Seacrest’s co-host during the first season of the show that refuses to die, American Idol. Brian was recently discovered driving for Uber and before anyone had an opportunity to give him any shit about it, Brian hit them with “Oh no the hell you won’t today!”
Currently Brian is going through a messy divorce and custody battle with his wife Kalea so he did the responsible thing and got a steadier job to provide for his five-year-old son Jackson. And what job is steadier than Uber? There will always be some glassy-eyed drunk mu’fucka at 2am slurring their words then falling asleep before getting dropped off at Denny’s. Job security on 100!
Since 2016, Brian has endured the joys of having random people in his car to keep food on the table, and when TMZ reported Brian’s current financial situation, they broke it all the way down to the very last cent. Well, Brian isn’t here for the shaming or hiding so he took to Twitter to go off on TMZ and Harvey Levin for putting his finances on blast.
I chose to stop doing standup comedy and started driving an Uber so I could be there for my son as much as he needed after our life as we knew it was destroyed.
Print that.@TMZ @HarveyLevinTMZ— Brian Dunkleman (@briandunkleman) January 4, 2019
And I make over a grand on a good week motherfuckers.@TMZ @HarveyLevinTMZ #HumanBarnacles
— Brian Dunkleman (@briandunkleman) January 4, 2019
And you know that saying, “Behind every good man there’s a woman ready to slice you to ribbons with her words“? Of course you don’t because I just made that shit up. But Brian’s girlfriend Andrea Whitney 100% had his back by posting a bikini photo of herself (???).
This is what an Uber driver’s girlfriend looks like. Fuck you @TMZ #ImInLoveWithAnUberDriver@briandunkleman pic.twitter.com/nnchL9eySP
— Andrea Whitney (@avocado515) January 4, 2019
This is why he’s an Uber driver.
Fuck you @TMZ #ImInLoveWithAnUberDriver@briandunkleman pic.twitter.com/EY02CNPLlw— Andrea Whitney (@avocado515) January 4, 2019
You know, you can have all the money and fame in the world and still be a terrible parent (see: Kardashians, All). And sidebar, #HumanBarnacles may just be my new favorite hashtag of 2019 since it already means so much in this day and age (see: Trumps, All).
Pic: Wenn.com