Night Crumbs

Netflix is doing a two-part limited series on Selena (don’t even ask “Gomez?”) that will debut in 2020. Well, I guess Selena’s family making that money from a TV series is better than making that money from putting her face on a grocery bag. But what I’m wondering is, who’s going to play Selena. Since this is Hollywood, I’m going to guess that Latina actress/singer Ariana Grande will be cast – Just Jared

Ashanti to the internet: Get ready, I’m going to break you. The internet to Ashanti: Err, is it in yet? – Lainey Gossip

This Lord of the Tainted Love Dance had me at “left nipple,” but I’m wondering why he’s doing this in what looks like the lobby of a funeral home – Towleroad

Shay Mitchell is giving you “Krystle Carrington as a Christmas tree (a Krystemas tree, if you will)” glamour – Popoholic

And Gigi Hadid is giving you “Lil Orphan Orange Otter pop as an 80s business woman” glamour – Drunken Stepfather

Lisa Vanderpump doesn’t have a credit card because she pays everything with diamonds, obviously – Reality Tea

If Sofia Richie wishes her grown boyfriend would spend more time with her in the VIP section at Chuck E. Cheese, and less time with the mother of his kids, she should find a dude with no kids – Celebitchy

Dames of the glamour table (sans Joan Collins, obviously) – SOW

Pic: Netflix