Open Post: Hosted By The Nearly 6-Foot Long CVS Receipt

November 11, 2018 / Posted by:

This was BOUND to happen someday. As a patron of CVS, this receipt length thing has gotten ridiculous. Just ask Washington D.C.’s Emma Keane. Fox 5 DC (via The Takeout) reported on Emma leaving CVS one day with a LONG RECEIPT that measure in at 5’8″. That receipt is as tall as me! It’s like someone asked a 65-year-old pathological liar for the receipts for all of their lies!

And get this – she only bought three items!

Keane is a really good person for this to have happened to, as she definitely possesses the sense of humor required to take full advantage of brief moments of viral fame. She even put up the receipt at her workplace for her coworkers to compare their heights against, with a Post-It asking, “How many CVS receipts tall are you?”

It turns out I myself am just one. Emma needs her own show because she posted pics of the receipt from her kitchen and discovered the Internet is snarky and concerned about her drinking.

The theory is that Emma is part of the ExtraCare program at CVS which prints out a MASS of coupons every time you buy anything there. It’s true. I have that card. So I wait for that damn anaconda-sized receipt to print out and eventually reach the floor and start curling up around my ankles. You know why? ExtraBucks Rewards. Sometimes you qualify for free money. So there’s a thrill when you get a receipt that says you’re getting two dollars back to spend any way you please! It’s worth waiting two months for the damn thing to finish printing out because free money is so exciting. It’s the little things that matter.

Pic: Twitter

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