U.S. Rep. Mark Sanford’s House Was The One To Avoid On Halloween

November 1, 2018 / Posted by:

A good Halloween is when the kid down the street tells you his recon mission around the neighborhood yielded at least five houses passing out full-sized candy bars for trick-or-treaters. Sadly, that was not the case for anyone who lives in the neighborhood of U.S. Rep. from South Carolina Mark Sanford. I mainly know about Mark because I like Evita, and Mark apparently can’t stop crying for Argentina because he was having an affair with an Argentinian woman while he was governor. Kids in his neighborhood know him now as “That punk-ass bitch whose house we wanted to egg.” Rather than passing out candy like a normal human, Mark decided pocket-sized U.S. Constitutions were better. Bah humbug, Halloween Scrooge!

The Huffington Post noticed Mark decided to give his trick-or-treaters reading material rather than treats of any kind. Psh, that’s what school is for.

While Donald Trump might need to peruse that whole basket, most people with a working brain figured Mark’s house would be the target for every roll of toilet paper and egg down at the local Piggly Wiggly.

Some even brought up the whole Argentinian affair.

Mark lost out on his re-election campaign during the Republican primary this year, so I really hope he takes all his free time to connect with the people, and learn that Halloween is less about amendments and all about Butterfingers, spiked apple cider, and dressing like a total THOT. Save the civics lesson for the Easter Bunny!

Pic: Twitter

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