Madamoiselle Belcalis Marlenis Almánzar, aka Our Stripper Queen of the Bronx, Cardi B, is here to make it clear that you will never see her baby Kulture Kiari Cephus, at least not until she is good and ready. How serious is Cardi B about not letting you see her baby? Dead serious. Shoe-throw serious. $1 million serious.
People is reporting that Cardi B, who’s newest song is literally called “Money” turned down a shit-ton of money instead of show off her baby to the world. Cardi claims that she and husband Offset are just not ready to pimp out their baby pics for a cash sum, regardless how large that sum is. Don’t worry, you’ll get there. While speaking with Apple Music’s Ebro Darden, she said:
“Me and my husband… We just don’t wanna show our baby right now… I got offered seven figures [for baby pictures], but I’m just not ready yet.”
‘Scuse? Seven figures for a few pictures of you and your man cradling a wrinkly newborn and you turned that down? That is the easiest money I’ve heard of! Put that kid in hiding afterwards, you know what I mean? Like: yeah you saw my baby but then you won’t see this little thing until they’re 16. Right? Have a baby reveal and then a young-adult reveal, make twice the pay checks, honey!
Since the baby was born back in July, the couple has shared only a few images of the baby and it’s usually of like a leg, or a hand, or a finger, or something. She also mentioned Kulture in her new single, rapping about her right after rapping about getting fucked for breakfast:
“I was born to flex, diamonds on my neck / I like boardin’ jets, I like mornin’ sex / But nothing in this world that I like more than Kulture.”
It’s strange to me that Cardi B, someone who should take as many checks as she can while she can, would turn down a million dollars (minimum because she said seven figures, she didn’t say what those figures were, eh?) for pictures of their baby. We are in a time when people have opened Facebook accounts for their newborns with no friends and Cardi out here worried about some pictures so she turns down a million… Like damn. If I was a celebrity, I would have a baby exclusively to sell the pictures of it. How rich is this lady that she was like “pass” to a million dollars? …Nicki Minaj ain’t stop nothing.
But the real story is, who is offering $1 million for pictures of Cardi B’s baby? Are they really that hard up for a tax write-off?