Who Is September’s Hot Slut Of The Month?

October 8, 2018 / Posted by:

The Hot Slut of the Month fight between humans and animals rages on! The animal kingdom has won five of this year’s HSOTM titles so far, while the humans have only won three. (Sorry, inanimate objects, but the HSOTM voters obviously hate you, because you haven’t won shit.) This battle-within-a-battle could either get as tight as a virgin gay flea’s clenched asshole or widen like a pass around bottom’s b-hole after an orgy, because there’s a beloved human and a beloved animal in this month’s HSOTM contest.

Like always, the first four finalists got the most Facebook likes for the month. The fourth was picked by me, and of course I had to pick a member of the species that will one day rule us all. Your choices for September are:

Terry Lauerman, the earth angel pepaw who proved that humanity isn’t totally a rotten corn kernel clinging to a shit log by visiting a cat shelter on the daily to nap and cuddle with the pussies.

The Microsoft Windows Solitaire Deck, the digital deck of cards on Microsoft Windows in the 90s that caused families to be torn apart because people shouldn’t could agree on which card cover to make the default.

The Ribbed Dick Building Of China, the glorious white uncut dick that was erected in the province of Guangxi and instantly became a temple in China for us dick worshipers to go, especially since it shot a hot load (aka fireworks) out of its tip during its launch party.

The Bread Thief Raccoon, who along with his friends, broke into a woman’s Toronto apartment and wouldn’t leave until it finished every last crumb of her bread while not giving a milli-ounce of a fuck.

Voting is below. Our new reigning HSOTM champion will be announced this Friday.


Pics: Facebook, Reddit, Shanghaiist, Jenny Serwylo

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