Hot Slut Of The Day!
Dash Dog!
The next time you need to dig deep within yourself to find the will to resist something (examples: resist eating an entire thing of ice cream, resist some good dick attached to an asshole, etc…), think of Dash Dog. If Dash Dog can resist eating a delicious hot dog long enough for his human to take a picture in the name of Instagram fame, you can resist anything! (Real talk: You’re probably going to eat that entire thing of ice cream and bounce on that asshole dick anyway, but at least you can say you tried to resist for a split second thanks to Dash Dog.)
Dash has an Instagram page, because duh, it’s 2018, and his human Ande fills it with pictures of him doing stuff all over their homeland of Seattle. Ande took Dash to a Mariners game, and instead of watching that boring baseball crap, he spent his time perfecting the perfect shot of his pooch patiently holding on to a hot dog with his mouth. Someone took a video of Ande doing his stage dad thing while taking the above picture of Dash. If you listen closely, you can hear Ande say, “You’re doing amazing, sweetie!” But unlike Pimp Mama Kris, Ande is speaking the truth! Dash IS doing amazing, sweetie.
That video made the rounds and got Dash more internet attention. But even though Dash is now an INTERNET STAH, he hasn’t let the fame go to his head and is still happy to mingle with the people!
And hot dogs aren’t the only delicious things that Dash can resist the urge to swallow immediately.
There’s no way I could hold onto a potato tornado that long without gobbling it up. How does Dash do it? Either he’s watching his figure since he’s a celebrity. Or he knows that shit ain’t good for him. Or he knows that by fighting his natural instinct to eat that crap up, he’ll gain Instagram followers, which may lead to endorsement deals, which will give him and dog-kind more money in their fight against catmanity to finally take over the world. And when the dogs take over the world, he can gobble up as much people food as he wants. Dash IS keeping his eye on the big prize.
Pic: Instagram