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July 16, 2018 / Posted by:

Teletubby Custard from Burger King!

Back when Teletubbies were at the peak of their fame and were greedy money whores who were selling everything from Beanie Babies to dildos (I’m not going to Google that mess, but I’m guessing Teletubby dildos are real), they got together with Burger King and Jell-O to sell their custard to the masses for a limited time in the 90s.

There’s many Teletubby custard recipes out there, but Burger King made theirs with Jell-O, leche, and probably enough preservatives and chemicals to cause one of your internal organs to mutate into an evil Teletubby that ate you from the inside/out (and not in a sexy way). I never tried Burger King’s Teletubby custard, but apparently it tasted like getting a blow job from an angel with no teeth while being handfed sugar-dipped raspberries by Idris Elba wearing a loin cloth spun from gold.

Here’s the video of the Teletubbies making their custard, and because of the farts and splash-sounds, this video is definitely some sucio freak’s idea of porn.

And do we really want to know what the secret ingredient of Teletubby custard was? Well, if the secret ingredient was what I think it was, then I guess those Teletubbies ate a lot of pineapple, because that stuff was supposedly sweeter than a sugar cube slathered with honey.

Pic: Burger King

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