Hot Slut Of The Day!
The Cat With A Human Face!
“The Cat With A Human Face” is my favorite Wonderful World Of Disney movie (starring Ricky Schroder) that never was. Catkind was not going to be outdone by the dog with a human face (aka Nick Offerman 95% through with shape-shifting into a pooch), so the Instagram page of a Russian breeder spit up videos and pictures of Valkyrie, a human-faced pussy, not to be confused with insufferable human-faced pussy, Donald Trump Jr. (and now I’ve just wrongly offended pussies everywhere).
Valkyrie the Maine Coon Cat has been getting attention from the internet because of her human-like facial features, which confuse my brain, because I half-see a cat who is thinking very cat-like thoughts (like the beautiful demise of humans) and I also half-see a human making the same “oh, I pity you stupid bitch for trying this move” face that a bank teller makes when I try to take $100 out of my account when I’ve only got $0.87 in there.
Here’s a video of the Cheshire Cat’s Russian cousin looking like people!
And here’s a video of Valkyrie nailing her audition for the live-action Thundercats movie without even trying:
And lastly, a disturbing video of a human showing off Valkyrie as a baby. This is the most terrifying and slightly adorable horror movie ever:
Valkyrie and I have something in common besides being able to freak people out with our faces. We’re both “fagot” born!
I have a feeling that one of two things is going to happen: Valkyrie is going to use her human-ish face to pretend to be Jocelyn Wildenstein and get her paws on the millions that Jocelyn is supposedly owed so she can use that money to take down shady breeders everywhere before taking over the world! Or Valkyrie’s going to run off to NYC and pay her dues waiting tables before she’s cast as Grizabella in the next revival of Cats. When I look deep into her eyes, I do hear her singing, “Meeeeeeeemurrrieees.” Or maybe I hear her saying, “I’m going to get you fucking humans for giving me this human face!” Either or!
Pic: Instagram