Chrissy Teigen Has Some Advice For Public Breast Feeding Shamers

July 8, 2018 / Posted by:

Meme icon Chrissy Teigen gave birth to her and husband John Legend’s second child, Miles Theodore, back in May. Miles has been enjoying the beautiful life nectar that emits from mom’s bosoms, and mom doesn’t have an issue with posting pics of the process. But other people do. Teigen recently posted a pic on Instagram of her breastfeeding Miles while simultaneously faux-nursing two-year-old daughter Luna’s babydoll. Most of her followers thought this was sweet and thanked her for continuing to normalize breastfeeding. One didn’t. In addition to milk, Chrissy’s got plenty of sass coming out of those boobs and expressed some just for her nay-sayer.

Here’s the pic Chrissy posted:

Luna making me feed her babydoll so I guess I have twins now

A post shared by chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) on

Glamour tallied up the positive tweets about Chrissy’s pic.

But there’s always that one person…

“Christ in a hand basket,” the Twitter user wrote. “Menstruating, childbirth and sex are natural, too, but that doesn’t mean I want to see pics of it and/or celebrities like @chrissyteigen taking a bath or nursing. We get it.”

Chrissy’s digital STFU not only cleverly worked boobs into her response but also addressed our ongoing “boring Instagram posts” crisis.

See what she did there? CALM YOUR TITS AND DEAL WITH MINE! CALM YOUR TITS is the perfect utilitarian response for so many situations. Is your WASP-y grandmother panicking over the canapes? CALM YOUR TITS. Is your child having a tantrum because his Happy Meal didn’t have the right Incredibles 2 toy inside? CALM YOUR TITS. Is your boss chewing you out for showing up drunk to work and not sending that spreadsheet? CALM YOUR TITS. (You’ll probably get fired in that last situation but it will be worth it.)

And what’s the big with the boobies? A friend of mine who was nursing brought her newborn to a party one time. And when she had to feed the kid, she went off into another room in the house and unfolded this “hooter hider” thing. It was like a tent for her tits! So she’s struggling with trying to set it up and her husband’s trying to help her but failing and the kid’s screaming cuz’ it’s hungry. She shouldn’t have to set up camping equipment to be able to feed her kid. Just whip it out and throw a little cloth over it so you’re not flashing nip if that’s a concern. Hell, Mayim Bialik’s kid is like 7 and practically mouth-latched on to her boob on the subway. It’s not like these moms are masturbating in public. Don’t do that, moms.

Pic: Instagram

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