THE QUEEN Had To Skip Out On Church Because Of An Illness 

June 28, 2018 / Posted by:

After decades on the job of being a royal, THE QUEEN fell under the weather and had to bail on a church service, so she sent her cousin, the Duke of Kent, instead. Ha! That’s like finding out the local high school production of Hello, Dolly! will be taking over for Bette Middler on Broadway this evening!

People says Queen Lizzy was supposed to attend a church service to celebrate a bicentenary of an order of chivalry, but she skipped because she was feeling ill, per her spokesperson:

“The Queen is feeling under the weather today and has decided not to attend this morning’s service at St. Paul’s Cathedral marking the 200th anniversary of the Order of St. Michael and St. George.”

Methinks QE2 doth protest under the veil of illness! That huss has been sitting on the throne for nearly 70 years, and she’s still kicking! How about give her a bi-weekly celebration for outlasting any dude who tried to run the country? Anyway, sources say it’s nothing to get too upset over because they didn’t even bother calling a doctor, and she’s still scheduled to head to Windsor Castle later today. Ain’t nothing going to keep a monarch and her corgis from some time in the country! Though, I’m sure there are some passive aggressive notes being sent to Duchess Meghan and Susan Sarandon that say, “We’re not saying THE QUEEN is feeling nauseated because of your barbaric bare shoulders and your uncouth handshake, but she definitely told us both instances made her wanna barf up shepherd’s pie.


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