Research has been done, and FridaBalls is an actual product, so this isn’t some jokey joke. Goldie Hawn’s actor son Oliver Hudson (he’s been in several thousand forgettable shows but he’s into balls so he can’t be that bad a guy) posted this homemade ad for FridaBaby’s FridaBalls underwear line on Instagram. Wait a minute, this is probably one of those product placement things, isn’t it? This is a total Kardashian move. Has Goldie approved this, Oliver? Then again, she was in that movie with Amy Schumer so her judgement is obviously not what it used to be.
This underwear actually makes sense. Even dudes without children know that little kids unerringly go for the nut shot every single time. I’m pretty sure my nephews are going to grow up to be some sort of kinky trampling people judging by the number of times they’ve literally STOOD ON MY CROTCH while I’m sitting on the couch and they want me to read them a story and they climb up TO FOR SOME REASON STAND ON MY CROTCH before settling down beside me. The story is read in a halting whisper and I vow to never get near those little bastards again. You can tell them NOT TO DO IT and next thing you know they’re running to hug you goodbye and HEADBUTTING your balls. Yeah – OW. Little kids are assholes.