A pregnant Cardi B almost died. The harrowing near-death experience will likely haunt her for the rest of her days. According to People, Cardi B and her fiance Offset were co-headlining at a festival when the near-miss accident took place. Also, depending on how good your close reading skills are, she gave birth at the venue.
While giving her last performance before giving birth at Washington D.C.’s Broccoli City Festival — which both the pregnant 25-year-old and her fiancé Offset were headlining — Cardi almost took a tumble out of her golf cart when the front wheels of the vehicle suddenly lifted off the ground.
Here’s the footage. TRIGGER WARNING: If you’re squeamish, have a weak heart, are afraid of heights, are pregnant yourself, think The Goonies is overrated, always misplace your keys but never actually lose them, have a gluten allergy or would be willing to travel to the Bay Area to duet with me on All Cried Out by Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam at karaoke; you have been warned!
I sat here and watched this 20 times and it just got funnier and funnier with each viewing, although the repeated cries of “too much weight, too much weight” and “somebody too big, somebody too big” reminded me of the time I helped capsize by uncle’s boat when proper attention was not paid to weight distribution. We all knew better but didn’t heed the age old adage, “Don’t put the two fat cousins on the opposite side of the two skinny cousins. See also: picnic benches”. I feel for that big brother on the back, I really do. But he should have known. They all should have known!