If it looks like a doddering old pepaw, and makes weird, questionable remarks like a doddering old pepaw, then guess what. It’s a doddering old peeaw! That’s the lesson learned from Burt Reynolds’ attempt to explain his “say what now?” comments to Hoda Kotb on Today about her purdy mouth and his love of a 7-year-old Sally Field who he didn’t actually meet until she was 31.
Burt’s still doing the rounds plugging The Last Movie Star and was interviewed by USA Today. He was asked to explain his previous remarks. In doing so, he pretty much confessed that he has no idea what he’s saying half the time and the other half of the time he’s napping.
By way of explanation, Reynolds says he mangled an attempt to compliment the host’s lips. “It didn’t come out like that. I don’t know what the hell I said,” says Reynolds. “But I got so (hacked) off at people being (hacked) off at me for hurting Kotb.”
That’s 10 pepaw points for archaic vocabulary (5 for each use of “hacked off”), 20 points for not knowing “what the hell” he said and a 2 point deduction for even remembering that it happened in the first place. Burt also earned himself 30 bonus points for courtly gentlemanship.
He said he sent Kotb a note afterward. “I never, ever meant to hurt her. I think she’s the best at doing what she does. And that laugh is to die for.”
Burt continued to rack up points for his explanation of why he said he fell in love with Sally at age 7.
“I didn’t say 7. I said 37, I think.”
The blanket denial was 20 points alone but the addition of “I think” at the end pumped those up to Triple Value Points, adding up to a whopping 60 points for the exchange!
Burt’s a winner, baby! His doddering old pepaw prize* is a free pass on all future banally sexist remarks and a lifetime supply of Turtle Wax (for his mustache).
*all prizes are subject to the approval of the court of public opinion. This is not a paid endorsement.