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February 20, 2018 / Posted by:

Lucky Charms’ new Magical Unicorn Marshmallow!

General Mills announced not too long ago that time was finally up for that raggedy ass looking hourglass marshmallow from Lucky Charms cereal after ten years. That was a good move, because nobody wants a stupid hourglass to remind them that it’s only a matter of time before they get diabetes from eating so many bowls of Lucky Charms. General Mills said yesterday that the dusty, old hourglass (no hate to the Days of Our Lives opening theme) will get replaced by the IT bitch of 2017: a unicorn! Unicorns were everywhere last year, and yes, Lucky Charms is late to the game, but it’s better to be late than unicorn-less. General Mills said that their magical unicorn marshmallows will be in Lucky Charms boxes next month.

“Our goal is to not only create a cereal that families and cereal fans will love and enjoy, but to inspire magical possibilities and help spark imagination and fun no matter what the age. That’s why, after 10 years, we decided to introduce a new charm with the help of the keepers of magic themselves – kids. They spoke, and after hearing their love for the magical unicorn, we listened.”

This is what the unicorn marshmallow will  look like in its real-form…so basically like Liberace’s kidney stones.

The magical unicorn marshmallow will become the 8th charm along with hearts, stars, horseshoes, clovers, blue moons, rainbows and red balloons.  While I’m all for magical unicorn marshmallows because they make Lucky Charms even gayer, and who wouldn’t want to have a big bowl of gay for breakfast, I do think they need to add a charm that celebrates their Irish heritage more. That’s why I’m going to petition for Lucky Charms to replace the red balloon with a Sheamus bulge marshmallow.

Pics: General Mills

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