It would have been a nearly all-black fashion show at the BAFTAs in London last night, in honor of the Time’s Up movement. But the class average was brought down by Duchess Kate (who was prevented from wearing black by royal no-politics protocol), and Frances McDormand (who just didn’t feel like it and showed up in pink-on-black instead).
For mostly everyone else, it was a multitude of black. Or black with a random kick of not-black, like Allison Janney. And by random, I mean a satin choker bolero on top of a Bibhu Mohapatra dress. It looks like a shirt made from the bottom half of Roger the Alien from American Dad that was put on backwards and upside down.
Natalie Dormer from Game of Thrones did weird, loose sleeves and a choker too. But her Alberta Ferretti gown gave me more of a scheming evil twin from a 70s soap opera who just inherited the family castle after someone had an unfortunate “accident.”
When I was younger, I was obsessed with vintage sequin floral appliqués, so much so that I kept my most favorite cherished one (gold sequins in a rose shape with dangly beads) in a jewelry box. All I wanted was a dress nice enough to slap all my appliqués on. Salma Hayek in Gucci looks like a picture I would have ripped out and pinned in the middle of a vision board.
Last but not least is British presenter AJ Odudu, who wore basically underwear and a curtain panel by a designer named Kolchagov Barba. It is winter in the UK, which means AJ was most likely the opposite of warm and comfortable, but you do what you’ve gotta do! Besides, if she got too cold, I’m sure she could have asked Allison Janney to borrow her emergency blanket-looking sleeves.
Here’s a whole lot more fashion from the BAFTAs last night. Honorable mention goes to Leslie Bibb whose dress kind of looks like the neon lighting on a casino floor.